Go Back   Pet forum for dogs cats and humans - Pets.ca > Discussion Groups - mainly cats and dogs > General Forum for cats and dogs

Reply
 
Thread Tools Display Modes
  #1  
Old February 8th, 2007, 11:51 PM
technodoll's Avatar
technodoll technodoll is offline
Honest Contributor
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Montreal, QC
Posts: 5,900
Wink Strict, Unbending Rules For Dealing With Stray Cats

STRICT, UNBENDING RULES FOR DEALING WITH STRAY CATS

1. Stray cats will not be fed.

2. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food.

3. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food moistened with a little milk.

4. Stray cats will not be fed anything except dry cat food moistened with warm milk, yummy treats and leftover fish scraps.

5. Stray cats will not be encouraged to make this house their permanent residence.

6. Stray cats will not be petted, played with or picked up and cuddled unnecessarily.

7. Stray cats that are petted, played with, picked up and cuddled will absolutely not be given a name.

8. Stray cats with or without a name will not be allowed inside the house at any time.

9. Stray cats will not be allowed inside the house except at certain times.

10. Stray cats will not be allowed inside the house except on days ending in "y".

11. Stray cats allowed inside will not be permitted to jump up on or sharpen their claws on the furniture.

12. Stray cats will not be permitted to jump up on, or sharpen claws on the really good furniture.

13. Stray cats will be permitted on all furniture but must sharpen claws on new $114.99 sisal-rope cat-scratching post with three perches.

14. Stray cats will answer the call of nature outdoors in the sand.

15. Stray cats will answer the call of nature in the three-piece, high-impact plastic tray filled with Fresh'n'Sweet kitty litter.

16. Stray cats will answer the call of nature in the hooded litter pan with a three-panel privacy screen and plenty of head room.

17. Stray cats will sleep outside.

18. Stray cats will sleep in the garage.

19. Stray cats will sleep in the house.

20. Stray cats will sleep in a cardboard box lined with an old blanket.

21. Stray cats will sleep in the special Kitty-Komfort-Bed with non-allergenic lambs wool pillow.

22. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed.

23. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed, except at the foot.

24. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed under the covers.

25. Stray cats will not be allowed to sleep in our bed under the covers except at the foot.

26. Stray cats will not play on the desk.

27. Stray cats will not play on the desk near the computer.

28. Stray cats are forbidden to walk on the computer keyboard on the desk when the human is asdfjjhhkl;ljfd.;oier' puyykmm4hbdm9lo9j USING IT.
__________________
"Let Thy Food Be Thy Medicine"

Take nothing but pictures, leave nothing but footprints.

:love: ~Akitas Are Love~ :love:
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old February 8th, 2007, 11:59 PM
erykah1310's Avatar
erykah1310 erykah1310 is offline
Blue eyed funny farm
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Canada
Posts: 5,595
Oh so true....
__________________
Courage is being scared to death and saddling up anyways. ~John Wayne
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old February 9th, 2007, 12:04 AM
jiorji's Avatar
jiorji jiorji is offline
cat slave
 
Join Date: Mar 2005
Location: montreal
Posts: 5,599
hahha i think this applies to dogastrophe with Gracie

and of course me and Twiggy

Last edited by jiorji; February 10th, 2007 at 08:46 PM. Reason: the name..
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old February 9th, 2007, 12:39 AM
Dracko's Avatar
Dracko Dracko is offline
Senior Contributor
 
Join Date: Dec 2006
Location: Saskatchewan
Posts: 1,466
Reply With Quote
  #5  
Old February 9th, 2007, 06:04 AM
Dogastrophe's Avatar
Dogastrophe Dogastrophe is offline
Senior Member
Helicopter Champion
 
Join Date: May 2005
Location: Nova Scotia
Posts: 773
Great list, we are about half way down it.
__________________
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^
Lucy - 9 yr old border(?) terrier mix
Jack - 8 yr old yorkie terrier mix
Gracie - 7 yr old tuxedo kitty

Monty - RIP buddy
^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^

"If your dog doesn't like someone you probably shouldn't either." - Unknown
"If cats could talk they would lie to you"
Reply With Quote
  #6  
Old February 9th, 2007, 10:48 AM
Kristin7's Avatar
Kristin7 Kristin7 is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: US
Posts: 857
too funny, love it!
Reply With Quote
  #7  
Old February 9th, 2007, 12:47 PM
meb999's Avatar
meb999 meb999 is offline
Senior Contributor
 
Join Date: Nov 2004
Location: montreal
Posts: 2,673
I love it!!
__________________
Marie-Eve and Buster (5 year old-ish rescued Boxer)

Deep thought, by Jack Handey : "I think my new thing will be to try to be a real happy guy. I'll just walk around being real happy until some jerk says something stupid to me."
Reply With Quote
  #8  
Old February 9th, 2007, 01:32 PM
breeze's Avatar
breeze breeze is offline
Half Way To Crazy
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Posts: 10,716
This is great. It's funny how we all say no no no no ,then ok just this once, then the rest is history. into your heart and the word yes just keeps popping up .
__________________
Have a heart that never hardens, and a temper that never tires, and a touch that never hurts."
Reply With Quote
  #9  
Old February 9th, 2007, 02:19 PM
krdahmer's Avatar
krdahmer krdahmer is offline
~Cat Servent~
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Niagara Falls, Ontario
Posts: 5,229
Oh my husband would love that...that was pretty much what happened to him every time I took to another little poor lost soul. And it explains why we now have 6 and all my family's homes are full too. Too cute.
__________________
Windy~Smoke~Buddy~Palomine~Fagan~Asker~Mickey Blue Eyes Venus

“The greatness of a nation and its moral progress can be judged by the way its animals are treated” -Mahatma Gandhi

"We're the renegades, we're the people; With our own philosophies; We change the course of history; Everyday people like you and me"- R A T M
Reply With Quote
  #10  
Old February 10th, 2007, 08:27 PM
mummummum's Avatar
mummummum mummummum is offline
-
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: The Hammer
Posts: 8,534
yep...sounds just like the dog rules.

Nice to see you cat-people finally fessin'
Reply With Quote
  #11  
Old February 11th, 2007, 05:49 AM
sarenab sarenab is offline
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Feb 2007
Location: Oregon
Posts: 25
VERY cute and true.....I mean how could it not be true?
Reply With Quote
  #12  
Old February 11th, 2007, 09:00 AM
chico2's Avatar
chico2 chico2 is offline
Senior Contributor
 
Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Oakville Ontario
Posts: 26,591
Oh yes,I can soooo see that happening,thank's TD for posting that
I know you are no great lover of cats and was a little concerned opening this thread thinking...oh,oh what does she do to these poor strays
__________________
"The cruelest animal is the Human animal"
3 kitties,Rocky(r.i.p my boy),Chico,Vinnie
Reply With Quote
  #13  
Old February 11th, 2007, 06:30 PM
technodoll's Avatar
technodoll technodoll is offline
Honest Contributor
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: Montreal, QC
Posts: 5,900
chico i like cats fine! i'm just allergic, and hubby is deathly allergic, and the dogs only want to chomp into them so... no cats allowed anywhere near
__________________
"Let Thy Food Be Thy Medicine"

Take nothing but pictures, leave nothing but footprints.

:love: ~Akitas Are Love~ :love:
Reply With Quote
  #14  
Old February 11th, 2007, 07:52 PM
rainbow's Avatar
rainbow rainbow is offline
-
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Beautiful BC's Kootenay Country
Posts: 34,757
That was cute.
Reply With Quote
  #15  
Old February 13th, 2007, 11:11 PM
H.P.'s Avatar
H.P. H.P. is offline
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2006
Location: VA
Posts: 312
Got to send this to mom! Her cat (official name "Not My Cat") got to move into the garage tonight.
__________________
Allie the shy dog
Benny the failed foster
ShazBot shelter mutt
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools
Display Modes

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off


Forum Terms of Use

  • All Bulletin Board Posts are for personal/non-commercial use only.
  • Self-promotion and/or promotion in general is prohibited.
  • Debate is healthy but profane and deliberately rude posts will be deleted.
  • Posters not following the rules will be banned at the Admins' discretion.
  • Read the Full Forum Rules

Forum Details

  • Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.8
    Copyright ©2000 - 2017, vBulletin Solutions, Inc.
    vBulletin Optimisation by vB Optimise (Reduced on this page: MySQL 0%).
  • All times are GMT -5. The time now is 12:36 AM.