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  #1  
Old October 30th, 2005, 09:30 AM
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mercy or cruelty?

THIS POST HAS BEEN EDITED.


I have no intention of having Princess the cat euthanized, before anyone says anything else.


A friend and I were discussing what her future would hold in a few years time after my grandmother dies and Princess is no longer able to stay in her home.

If, for any reason at all, I would not be able to find a home for her or keep her myself,
If after that period of time her mental and emotional condition had not improved
We concluded that rather than dump her in a shelter (she is terrified of being in cages) euthanization would be a gentler option.

As I am not able to keep her, I am in contact with the rescue I adopted her from at the beginning of the month and we will be trying to rehome her. Being put in a shelter is not an option, but we'll figure something out.

Regardless, I wanted to know what people on this board thought of euthanization of an animal with no physical health problems. The only health problems are mental and emotional.

Sorry if my post was confusing.

Last edited by cutiecherise; October 31st, 2005 at 10:37 AM. Reason: Edited for Clarity
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  #2  
Old October 30th, 2005, 09:47 AM
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I’m sure you are about to be flamed but at least you are asking so I don’t believe you are convinced that your solution is either the right one or the only one.

If I am clear here you got a cat for your grandmother and you thought that might take you to a point some two years away before you would need to make a ‘decision’.

That decision should have been made BEFORE you adopted the cat. It is up to you to find a home for that cat now. Somebody here has the signature of ‘you are forever responsible for what you tame’ or something like that. You are responsible for this cat.

Here’s the easy way out - if the rescue you got Princess from can't help search for and contact another cat rescue in your area and beg them to find a home for this cat and make a donation too – if you need to buy your way out of this situation then get out your wallet. Do not take this cat to the SPCA or Humane Society, as many don’t make it out.
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Old October 30th, 2005, 10:09 AM
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mew

twodogsandacat:

Maybe I'm wrong for thinking this, but you can't save every cat! Am I wrong?

There are thousands of homeless cats packed into shelters everywhere that are sociable and affectionate, that can't find homes.

I admit that adopting this cat was a mistake, and I should have picked on that was more suited to my grandmother's needs. As well if she had been more affectionate, or even more suitable to adapting, I would have been able to find her another stable home, or even bring her with me as I move from apartment to apartment.
I did feel sorry for Princess and wanted to see If I she could fit in here.
Was that a mistake?

Yeah, I'm sure I'm a terrible person for feeling this way but If it was just an issue of finding a new home THAT ISN'T THE PROBLEM!
The problem is this poor creature is going to be going through all this torture and trauma!
It's been bad enough for her!

The foster family she was with (wonderful people) had a house full of cats that she was terrified of. Her not being there meant they could foster more kittens that needed constant care etc.
I'm not saying it's better to kill than bother finding a new home,
I'm saying that it's bad enough she's been so abused that she's afraid of a hand reaching toward her,
and the more she moves around the harder it will be.
I knew that I would need to find a solution to a cat with no home before I adopted Princess.

I did NOT know enough about princess.
That's my fault more than anyone,
but regardless.
It's not a matter of what's easiest for me. I could stick her in a cage and move her around with me, cramp her into a new apartment every six months and do my best to take care of her,
but what kind of life would that be for her?
Other cats can handle that, and THAT is what I was expecting.

Because I now know she's not suited to this lifestyle, I am dealing with this NOW.
One month after adopting her, rather than two years.
Trouble for me? Yeah, a little. Trauma for her? More than she needs.
But I'm dealing with it.

I just want to know if I'm the only one on this site who thinks that you can't save every cat.
I have already contacted the foster family, and the rescue I adopted her from are going to call me back next week.
We'll figure this out,
but in my mind it's not as simple as a normal adoption because this isn't a normal cat. Go to a shelter and see how the cats climb their wire cage doors to get to you. Those cats have a chance, and they're sad, and lonely, but their life isn't living hell because they can adapt. Cats are amazing resilient animals, and can pull through almost anything,
but at what point do you say
"Enough suffering."

I'm sure you're all about to say that point is much further along than this.
Regardless, you can all start throwing your torches now.
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Old October 30th, 2005, 10:12 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by twodogsandacat
Here’s the easy way out - if the rescue you got Princess from can't help search for and contact another cat rescue in your area and beg them to find a home for this cat and make a donation too – if you need to buy your way out of this situation then get out your wallet.
That may be the easy way out for me, but nothing about that is going to be easy for Princess, and not the rescue she ends up with either.
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Old October 30th, 2005, 10:12 AM
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First and foremost, I am confused as to why YOU chose a cat for someone else. I am not suprised that they are not a "perfect match" seeing as how your grandmother didn't even pick her out. I agree with 2dogsandacat, you are committed to this cat, simply saying that your grandmother is getting fed up with it is NO excuse. NONE.
If anything, it should be your responsibility to care for the cat (both now, and after your grandmother passes) as it was you who "rescued" the cat in the first place.
Euthanization is a solution to severe, endless pain and suffering, not to an anoyance.
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Old October 30th, 2005, 10:22 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Puppyluv
First and foremost, I am confused as to why YOU chose a cat for someone else. I am not suprised that they are not a "perfect match" seeing as how your grandmother didn't even pick her out.
The cat my grandmother wants belongs to someone else, about three houses down. She is a very lonely woman, and loves cats, however, this cat has bitten her. If I had known that the cat was a biter, or that my grandmother couldn't read cat body language, I would have chosen another cat.

Is it uncommon for people to "try out" cats from shelters?
I can't see it as being possible that any cat from any shelter would fit in with any family.
If my grandmother didn't get along with the cat it had always been my intention to return the cat to the shelter within the first week.
I kept princess longer because I was hoping once my grandmother saw her settled down she would get along with her,
but she doesn't want this cat.

Yes I paid that 50$, and the cat is my responsability.
Which is why I am seeking to find the best possible solution for this cat.
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Old October 30th, 2005, 10:38 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thalia is Crazy
twodogsandacat:

Maybe I'm wrong for thinking this, but you can't save every cat! Am I wrong?
If you didn't take her from the rescue in the first place she may of found a more suited home so I still refer to the original 'you become responsible' statement.

As for the other question can every cat be saved I would say this isn’t every cat it is a cat you took responsibility for. Somebody else uses the signature 'saving a cat or dog may not make a difference to the world but it will make a world of difference to that one dog or cat'.

Belief in that statement (or more accurately the story attached below) is why I drove 1500 miles into a hurricane zone under the threat of a second hurricane. I do believe this statement right down to my bones. There are many animals that can't be saved but please read paragraph one again. You OWE this cat.

Do you have kids? What lesson will you be teaching them and how will it affect them later in life? Having this cat destroyed is the easy way out. Having problems in school - walk away. Having problems in your marriage - walk away.

Imagine that the survival of the universe itself depended on this cat finding a home yet you couldn’t tell anyone that...could you find a home for it then?


THE STARFISH

In Maine, they tell of an old man walking along the beach with his grandson. The boy picked up each starfish they passed and threw it back in the ocean. "If I left them here", said the boy, "they would dry up and die. I'm saving their lives."

The old man said, "But the beach goes on for miles, and there are millions of starfish. What you're doing won't make any difference."

The boy looked at the starfish in his hand, threw it in the water, and answered: "It makes a difference to this one."

Adapted from Loren C. Eiseley's,
The Star Thrower
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Old October 30th, 2005, 10:41 AM
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ahh well I set myself up for this one.

I'm sorry If I don't think the same way as all of you do, and I don't understand you.
I love animals. I loved my cat Tragic more than anyone could know, even though she peed on all my clothing and anything she could find. I kept her, and even after I couldn't figure out how cure that problem Instead of getting rid of her, i just accepted cat pee as part of my life.
I am willing to accept living in cat pee stained houses for the love of my pets.

But this cat isn't my pet.
This is a cat I adopted from a rescue. I made a mistake. The cat doesn't suit my lifestyle, and I don't think she will be happy living with me if she stays here after my grandmother dies.
In fact I think her life will be a living hell.
I don't love this cat. I care about her like I would care about any other cat in the world, and no more. But I still respect her, and I do not want to cause her undue suffering.

So now that I've tried having her fit in around here and it hasn't worked out, I am asking the rescue to take her back. They dont have any foster family who is willing/able to take her.
So I am looking elsewhere.


I am not looking to kill something that bothers me.
I am not bothered by princess.
It makes me sad that she's happy but not wanted here. It would make me feel even worse to see her suffer through the constant moving around that I will be doing. Other cats can handle that, and If I had known she wouldn't be able to adjust well, and that my grandmother wouldn't get along with her, I wouldn't have adopted her!
But now that she's been in my care for a month, and is still not fitting in, I am trying to find somewhere else for her to live.

I made a mistake. I'm trying to fix it.

But that's not the issue.
What I'm asking about is at what point is euthanization cruel, and at what point is it merciful?

You are all welcome to flame as much as you like,
but my belief is this: If I could save a hundred cats or one, I would save a hundred.
If I could save fifty cats or one, I would save fifty.
If I could save ten cats or one, I would save eleven.
Some cats require as much care as a hundred cats. Some cats require more.
But then you have a hundred other cats that are left uncared for.
I don't think it would be unlikely for Princess to remain in a shelter or rescue for the rest of her life, but that's not fair to her. I tried to give her a chance, but it was a chance I couldn't give her.

Once again, I made a mistake. I kept princess here for a month. I will look for a new home for her. I apologize for making mistakes.
This 'mistake' has been a lucky break for princess, who was confined to a single room in foster care for fear of other cats. here she has run of the whole house. It's quiet here and she's content. However, as lovely as this may have been for her, it was doomed from the start.
All because of my mistakes.
Which I admit to and am responsible for.
I adopted the wrong cat. I made a mistake. I am not going to kill her because she is an annoyance. I do not find her annoying. I will not keep her here any longer because if she bites my grandmother and if my grandmother gets an infection it's likely she could die, and then I would have to be responsible for that as well as adopting the wrong cat.

Does everyone else here have the good fortune of finding the perfect cat at a glance?
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Old October 30th, 2005, 11:52 AM
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Keep in mind that taking the cat from a rescue and then giving it up again is not saving it. Saving it involves keeping it for the duration of its life.

Soooo many people use the excuse "I got the wrong cat". If you had adopted Boo and he puked every night for 4 months and cost you $2000, would he be the wrong dog? A rescue is just that. If you wanted to pick out all the characteristics of the cat, you probably should have gotten a doll. Every rescue has its past, and the truth is, you're just adding to this cat's sad past.

And this irks me:
Quote:
But this cat isn't my pet.
This is a cat I adopted from a rescue.
That is saying "I adopted this cat but it's not my responsibility." That's a load of BULL. If you get an animal to give to somebody and the person can't take the animal, it IS your pet. You signed the papers that promised this animal a home. Give her a home. Just because you failed at it, doesn't mean this cat has to be euthanized either. Find somebody who really wants to SAVE a cat.
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Old October 30th, 2005, 12:14 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thalia is Crazy
But this cat isn't my pet.
This is a cat I adopted from a rescue. I made a mistake. The cat doesn't suit my lifestyle, and I don't think she will be happy living with me if she stays here after my grandmother dies.
In fact I think her life will be a living hell.
I don't love this cat. I care about her like I would care about any other cat in the world, and no more. But I still respect her, and I do not want to cause her undue suffering.
YOU adopted her, YOU "rescued" her, you made a commitment. This is not a "hmm lemme just try this one out.... nope don't like her... lemme try another" We're not talking about shoes here! We're talking about animals! LIVES!!!

I still don't get why YOU would pick out someone elses cat! SInce your grandmother is the one with it all day, SHE should have picked it out! (Assuming she even wanted a cat)
What sort of rescue did you get her from? Did they not do any screening? Surely they would have noticed that you were picking out an animal for someone else, someone with a short life expectancy no less.... I know if I had told the rescue i got my dog from that "Oh yeah, well I think my grandmother, who may not live more than 2-3 years, would like this dog, so I want to adopt the dog for her. Oh no, my grandmother doesn't need to meet the dog, I'll make the decisions..." They would have rejected me on the spot!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Thalia is Crazy
But now that she's been in my care for a month, and is still not fitting in, I am trying to find somewhere else for her to live.
How is Princess not fitting in??? You havent even explained this.
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Old October 30th, 2005, 01:01 PM
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I'm sorry Thalia - I don't see the problem. You adopted the cat - or chose Princess for your grandmother. Therefore, this makes you responsible for her. Totally!! She had a bad life BEFORE being rescued and if she unhappy at your grandmother's, then it is up to you to find a home - if that home is not yours - for her. And euthenization is never an option for an otherwise healthy cat. I can't believe you would even consider it. My heart actually constricted when I read this. You did not create the abuse but you knew the cat's background when you adopted her and you admit it was a mistake. Call the people at the rescue and ask them for help - if they are a no kill rescue. I am sure they'd be unhappy to hear of your plans for Princess. There are many families where Princess would fit in. A cat is not like a piece of furniture that "doesn't fit in" with the decor - Princess is a living vibrant being who depends on you to help her, not to kill her!!!

To me, this is not complicated. You have responsibility for Princess. If you do not want her, for God's sake (and for Princess's), find someone who will look after her and where she will "fit in". She deserves a good home after all this.

I won't say I admire your honesty tho at least you are honest and the only admirable trait here was that you at one time wanted to help Princess and you are weighing this in your mind so you are not completely amoral. You perhaps should have given more thought before getting Princess and possiblyan older kitty might have been a better choice for your grandmother. BUT get some help from the organization from whom you adopted Princess from and find her a new home.
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Old October 30th, 2005, 01:25 PM
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ok seriously lets get this straight.

I am not going to kill/destroy/maim or otherwise harm princess.

The more I think about it, the more I realize it is way too extreme. I did consider it as an option, not because I didn't want to deal with her, but because I was unsure of her future in someone elses hands.
Euthanization raelly is unneccessary for a healthy cat. I now agree, now that I've thought about it some more. I wouldn't have rushed into it anyhow, but because it had crossed my mind i wanted tobring it up.
and I appreciate people standing up and talking about it.
I asked for that.


But I never said Princess wasn't my responsability, and never claimed to have "saved" her or "rescued" her. But I haven't ruined her life either.

The rescue I adopted her from was also informed that this cat was to be a companion for my grandmother, who may not live very long. That was a bridge to be crossed at a later date.
I am not going to give the name of the rescue, believe me they've done nothing wrong other than try to find a home for a cat in their care. It didn't work out, so she'll have to try again.

And as for how she doesn't fit in, I've said already my grandmother has expressed that she severely dislikes this animal. Princess bit my grandmother, not that it was Princess' fault. I blame my grandmother who is apparently too senile to understand that petting a cat that is hissing isn't going to make the cat happier.

I made a mistake of adopting a cat that was not suited to my family and now I have to return that cat to a rescue.

No she's not a shoe.
She's alive. I understand.
I never said she wasn't my responsability. I never claimed to have "saved" her.

I am going to put the happiness of my family member above the happiness of a stranger.
I won't apologize for that.

Any more torches to throw?
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Old October 30th, 2005, 02:14 PM
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Well, I was not throwing torches tho to be honest I am not sure what you mean by that - it doesn't sound nice tho so I assume you are accusing me of something???? Not sure, a flame thrower in my book is one who starts things or makes accusations and I had no intention of doing that.As for flaming in the "internet communication" context, I most assuredly did not deliberately flame you or anyone. You asked for opinions and I gave you mine. I did not suggest you hurt the cat. In fact, I think elderly ppl can benefit from a cat or an animal if there is a plan in place for the pet after that person dies. I know several of my young patients who have pets but they also have parents who can care for the pets later. (However, in a few situations, the family has rehomed the pet because it reminded them too much of their deceased child, sigh!! But that's another issue Most are the exact opposite and care for the pet as a tribute to their child.)

Can I ask - and I am just trying to understand here so pls don''t jump down my throat (I can't take that today, this is supposed to be my refuge away from death and mayhem) - why you adopted a kitty for your grandmother if you knew she did not like cats? Or did you not know? Or did you think you could convert her to becoming a cat person? Or, did she develop demetia later and then said she disliked the cat? Most rescues interview everyone in a family before they will permit an animal to go to a family - how did your grandmother get by that? (Just wondering about the rescue here and why they would allow a cat to be adopted by someone who hated her - to be honest, it makes no sense at all!) I realize your grandmother (if she was ill at the time) may have had difficulty going to their office but surely they did a home visit.

I think your best option is to either contact the Rescue (tho to be frank, they do not sound all that good at what they do , in the sense that clearly Princess and your grandmother are not all a good match!) or find another Cat or Animal Rescue that can assist you to rehome Princess. Can you foster her in the meantime or have a friend who could of you do not want her around your grandmother?

Re: this somment " am going to put the happiness of my family member above the happiness of a stranger." I have no idea what you mean by that. Who is the stranger? And by family member, do you mea Princess or your grandmother? What ARE you talking about? I was up late last nite - could not sleep so maybe I just don't get it, lol

Anyway - good luck in rehoming Princess. What kind of of cat is she? Perhaps a breed specfic rescue might help?

Last edited by CyberKitten; October 30th, 2005 at 02:23 PM.
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Old October 30th, 2005, 04:47 PM
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CK I think she meant the stranger is the cat and the family is the grandma, meaning if grammy hates the cat, the cat has to go.
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Old October 30th, 2005, 05:21 PM
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I apologize ahead of time if this comes across as rude, that is not my intention.

I just think it's very cruel of you to consider putting this cat down when you are the one who took the responsibility of adopting it. I understand you adopted it for your grandmother, but it was still you who accepted the responsibility. If you thought that this would have been an issue to think about years down the road when your grandmother passes, that was extremely irresponsible on your part. Cats are not difficult animals to take care of. They are very self-sufficient, so I don't see why it would be an issue for you to care for the animal until YOU found it a decent home. It is your responsibility and it is very cruel of you to think of putting this animal down. Let's just think, are we permitted to put misbehaved or unwanted children down? NO, that is murder. Same goes for animals. It is our responsibility to keep animals safe. If everyone took the attitude "Whatever - someone else can deal with it." Then nothing would be accomplished and no animals would be safe. I just think you are very irresponsible to even consider this.
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Old October 30th, 2005, 06:30 PM
LL1 LL1 is offline
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A cat rescue with a $50 adoption?That sounds weird to me.Did they know you were giving the cat to your Grandma or did you lie to them?
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Old October 30th, 2005, 07:08 PM
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Quote:
I just want to know if I'm the only one on this site who thinks that you can't save every cat.
No, you're not the only one who thinks so. I certainly, and sadly, know that you can only save a teeny percentage of them. And yes, death is preferable to the misery that many animals suffer. But this one WAS saved, supposedly.

I"m not flaming you. You know you made a mistake picking a cat for an 87 year old woman, who you say is "senile", and knew would certainly will not be around to care for this cat. Your grandmother "loathes" her, you don't love her and you wonder why this poor despised animal is acting the way she does? She's probably never had anyone love her in her life.

Yes, we sometimes get an animal through circumstances that is not our ideal, but we must love them for what they are and not what we want them to be.
I have a cat here I can't even touch, but I took her in for better or for worse. She didn't ask to come live with me.

I really fear that this elderly, senile lady who hates this cat may be abusing her as well. It's hard to picture someone hating this poor animal, yet being kind to her. Poor kitty.

I can't imagine a rescue giving a cat to someone that old, who hadn't even SEEN the cat first, without a written guarantee that someone else would assume the care of the cat when your grandmother is no longer able to.

Either they wren't told the truth, or they are highly irresponsible. AND, no rescue would ever leave a cat with someone who hates her OR see her put to death for no reason other than that she's inconvenient and no one likes her. Something is wrong here.
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Old October 31st, 2005, 08:03 AM
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All too often people have their pets PTS because they are:
inconvenient
not suited to their "lifestyle"
pet doesn't "like" them
can't train them (usually don't bother trying)
too big
too needy
not a nice personality
etc., etc., etc.

You want my opinion? I do not think you are doing the cat a favor if you euthanize it. Just because she does not fit into your "lifestyle" doesn't mean she can't fit into someone elses. Also, she may have issues, that you and grandmother are unable to deal with, that doesn't mean that there aren't plenty of people out there who are willing to help her heal from her past abuse. It has and can be done.

Most people are not flaming you here, as you seem to be prepared for. You asked for opinions, and many folks around here have strong ones. I do agree that you cannot save every animal, but I do think you can try. Start by giving this cat a chance, I'm sure that there are people out there that are more than capable of showing this kitty un-conditional love, something she has never had before and surely needs to heal from her past.
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Old October 31st, 2005, 10:19 AM
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Thalia is crazy,

It's unfortunate that the match between Princess and your grandmother didn't work and more unfortunate that you didn't plan for the long term care and safety of your new family member. Everyone on this board, including myself, adopts/saves pets and keeps them for better or for worst. Many of us who rescue/adopt pets have more than a handful of rescued cats and dogs, not by choice, but because of other people's neglect or lack of good judgment.

But I do want to thank you for choosing a cat from a rescue rather than a pet store as so many others do everyday. Thank you for choosing an older cat with a tumultuous past rather than the cute little kittens than tempt everyone’s hearts. Thank you for coming on this board seeking expert advice with your questions of euthanasia rather than listening to your friend’s suggestions. Thank you for trying to re-home this cat rather than releasing it outside like thousands do everyday even after the cat bit your senile grandma, even after the irresponsible shelter who sold you the cat has refused to take the cat back.

And above all, I want to thank you for admitting your mistake and learning from it. Unfortunately, it’s at the expense of this cat’s safety, but perhaps what you’ve learned about the lifelong commitment of pets will ensure that the people around you benefit from your knowledge and not repeat the same mistake.
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Old October 31st, 2005, 10:39 AM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by CyberKitten
why you adopted a kitty for your grandmother if you knew she did not like cats? Or did you not know?
She loves and has loved every cat that has ever come in the door. Princess is simply the only one that has ever bitten her.
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Old October 31st, 2005, 11:07 AM
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TIC--I don't think you're cold-hearted because this thought has crossed your mind or because you have adopted and don't feel the match is right. In fact, I think your motives were genuine and your heart was--and is--in the right place, however misguided. I do admire your honesty and your willingness to open yourself up to personal attack for the sake of deciding what is best for this cat.

I think euthanasia for this cat would not be euthanasia, but murder. It does no justice to this cat's life to kill it because you made a mistake.

You said, "It makes me sad that she's happy but not wanted here." If the cat is happy there, then she can be happy--and wanted--in someone else's home. It sounds as if there is no urgency to rehome her and find a good match with someone who has a quiet lifestyle, so take the time and find this for her. Rehoming is a stressful process for any cat, but it is a much gentler option than what you had been considering.

While it is true that you can't save every cat, you CAN save every cat whose life you have power over.

What about a little training for the biting issue? Even old dogs can learn new tricks--and I mean both the cat and your grandmother, with no disrespect intended. Is the biting the only thing standing between your grandmother bonding with this cat?
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  #22  
Old October 31st, 2005, 02:41 PM
amber416 amber416 is offline
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Thalia is crazy,

You are very right...you can't save them all. But you could save this one. If she is happy where she is (despite being unwanted) maybe you could work with her. Maybe you could come to love her and ultimately really save this poor kitty who probably has never been loved before. Rescue is such a commitment, whether you are doing the rescuing, the fostering, or the adopting, you take on a huge responsibility. I know it's hard to have another life in your hands and to be unsure of what's really best for this animal that has no voice to tell you him or herself. You have to be this cat's voice, now.

I have taken in a foster that is semi-feral and will probably never be adoptable, as she certainly is not a cute playful kitten or an affectionate lap cat, which is what most people seem to want. I could dump her back at the rescue i work with--i didn't adopt her, this was supposed to be a temporary foster-- see her released to an outdoor home or stuck in a cage for who knows how long, but I made the decision that each animal that passes through my home will have a home with me if needed. A home where they can know kindness and love and what it feels like to actually be wanted. Yes, that might mean i can save less, to prevent myself from getting over my head, but at the end of the day, i am actually SAVING them, not just going through the motions and letting the less than perfect cats slip through the cracks.

Anyway, I'm glad you decided not to euthanize her and i'm glad you thought about it and got other opinions before acting...you obviously care about her well being so why not give her more of a chance with you?
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  #23  
Old October 31st, 2005, 02:53 PM
Snooky'sMom Snooky'sMom is offline
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Good heavens, we've all made mistakes in our lives. I've made some big ones with my cats too. At least you see that you did. I'm not going to preach to you but only tell you from experience that euthanizing a cat is very hard to do. I just had to do it with my oldest kitty. He was 19 and I know it was the right decision ( He probably only had a few hours left to live) but it still didn't make it any easier. Who are we to play God with our pets? How can we make the decision on what they can or cannot live with? I just know though, if you make the decision to euthanize a healthy cat, it will be hard to live with the guilt. You seem like quite a caring person to me. No, we can't save every cat but if we all made the decision to at least save the cats that are part of our lives, then all the shelters wouldn't be so crammed. When we make the decision to have kids and become parents, there are good times and bad times when they are growing up. Some parents grow pretty grey!! LOL. The same goes for the pets. There are good times and bad times. My suggestion would be to continue to look for a home for the kitty but keep her with you while you do. Don't give up. Keep on looking.
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  #24  
Old October 31st, 2005, 03:10 PM
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Roxy's_MA Roxy's_MA is offline
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Forgive me, I already know this post will seem harsh, but not as harsh Princess possible fate.

You can't save every cat, but if you can't even save the animals you are resbonsible for....well that is very sad :sad:. When you adopt any animal, you are making a commitment for sometimes up to 20 years. This is exactly why people need to reasearch before running out and getting a pet.

I really hope that Princess does not end up part of the huge number of cats that is euthinzed everyday due to the irresponsibility of humans.

Sounds like you are completely desensitized to the fact that animals get dumped everyday. NO we can't save every cat, but you can save this cat if you really want to. Anything less would be just an exuse to justify to yourself what has happened. If Princess is put down, I really hope this is your last pet EVER!
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  #25  
Old October 31st, 2005, 03:16 PM
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BMDLuver BMDLuver is offline
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This cat belongs to a rescue whether adopted or not, this cat must be returned to the rescue, an adopter does not have the right to make a decision on euthanasia or what is right when the animal is being returned. It's surrendering, plain and simple, let them make the decisions.
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  #26  
Old October 31st, 2005, 03:57 PM
Lucky Rescue Lucky Rescue is offline
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Quote:
This cat belongs to a rescue whether adopted or not, this cat must be returned to the rescue, an adopter does not have the right to make a decision on euthanasia or what is right when the animal is being returned.
Absolutely. Our contract forbids anyone to sell, give away or kill an animal without our knowledge and consent. Any unwanted animals must be given back to us.

If this rescue won't take this cat back, they're no better than a kill shelter.

Sorry to repeat this, but the definition of "euthanization" is ending life to end suffering. For a healthy animal, the word is "killing". So please don't say you're going to euthanize a healthy young cat. I know it's sounds better, but it's not accurate.
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  #27  
Old October 31st, 2005, 11:42 PM
HaleyBug HaleyBug is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thalia is Crazy
twodogsandacat:

Yeah, I'm sure I'm a terrible person for feeling this way but If it was just an issue of finding a new home THAT ISN'T THE PROBLEM!
The problem is this poor creature is going to be going through all this torture and trauma!
It's been bad enough for her!
.
You are trying to justify killing this cat is better than the pain and suffering it may feel in another home?? Do you really think this cats only options this point in life is live with you and move from place to place where it isnt loved or be killed?? All because you think it would be torture to find it a home where someone will be committed to give it the love and respect it truly deserves. ...I have problem with this thinking only because my dog was brought into shelter 6 times. When I decided to take her they told me all her 'problems" and said she has already been brought to them 6 times and they were leary. Well that was 5 years ago and yes she had major psychological and emotional problems but I give her the love she needs and she has given me more than I ever wanted in return...There is someone out there who can LOVE this cat why not foster the cat for now until you find it a home..????
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  #28  
Old November 1st, 2005, 12:29 AM
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LM1313 LM1313 is offline
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I'm glad you decided euthanasia isn't the answer. But I still feel a need to comment.

As I write this, I'm listening to the jingle-jingle of Phantom slowly inching through the hall, pausing to sniff every rug. She is not the kind of cat who comes running to greet people. She is definitely not a lap cat. And I'm willing to bet that she's afraid of more things than Princess is. Phantom is absolutely paranoid. Trees, rugs, the vet, doorways, mops, certain rooms in the house, strangers in general and kids in particular--she's afraid of them all. She hisses at guests and claws them if they are foolish enough to try to pet. She bites if you pet her "too much." She has been known to hit ankles.

Phantom has NEVER been abused, so she has less reason than Princess to be afraid of things. She just develops random phobias of rugs or boxes or whatever. (I think she has mental problems.) She is not an "ideal cat" to most people's way of thinking. And she's scared a lot of the time.

But you know, watching her roll on her back on the patio or curl up on her cushion or--sometimes--purr and rub against legs with big, wild eyes, or sit on top of the playhouse, pretending she can't hear us calling her . . . you can tell that she is happy in her own way. She has a good quality of life. She has her own little missions, like watching out the window for the neighbor's cat, Calvin, competing with the dog for crabgrass, carrying around her toy seal, and sneaking into my mom's room where she's not allowed.

There is no way she would want to die because of the way she is. There is no way we would euthanize her, except for medical reasons. She's a living, breathing, feeling creature. She's our responsibility. And she's family.

~LM~
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  #29  
Old November 1st, 2005, 01:19 AM
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CyberKitten CyberKitten is offline
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Re: She loves and has loved every cat that has ever come in the door. Princess is simply the only one that has ever bitten her.

I was not going to make any more comments on this thread b/c I am not sure anything I say is going to make an iota bit of difference (I am just tired of reading about ppl hurting pets, emotionally or otherwise and trying to justify it.)

My cat has bitten me once. I'd had other cats bite me for one reason or another. And now I realize I should not have asked my questions b/c it only begs more to be asked. You will never convince me your grandmother likes cats - after your lenghty treatise almosty suggesting the cat is better off murdered than with her and while I almost know I will be sorry I asked, how can an adult - who holds all the power in a relationship with an innocent animal- be angry with the cat? My God, listen to what you are saying!!! Do you hate a child who hits you? Someone who says something mean /c they are ill? Surely, your grandmother must realize this cat had problems when she bit her. Cats do not bite for no reason!!!! This kitty was likely stressed and scared - and because she reacted in the only way she knew how, that is no reason for anyone , (I don;t care who it is) to be angry. If she does suffer from dementia, she herself needs help!! Elderly ppl do very well with a pet -provided there is a plan in place if something happens to them (tho we all need to have provisions made for our pets!) but your she is ill as you say, the shelter should not have given her a cat!!! She might benefit from a therapy cat but in a supervised setting. Are you her caretaker? Does she have homemakers or nurses coming in to help - saomething we have here for ppl with dementia ot senility. Even caretakers of elderly ppl need breaks or respite now and then so if that is why you are staying with her, you need to get some help as well for yourself. I cared for my grandmother when she was dying of breast cancer and I know how stressful it can be - and I was fortunate in that she always remembered she loved cats - and mine and my beagle were only too happy be with her!!

The best thing you can do is return this kitty to the Rescue tho I have to concur with whoever said there is something wrong here and we do not have the entire story. (Which is of course understandable - none of us likes to admit we did anything wrong and I do commend you for at lreast realize you made a mistake in bringing this cat home.)

The solutuon is simple - bring her back so the Rescue can find her a home where people will love her. You say the cat hates cages - surely this Rescue can find a family that will foster her. If you have probs with the Rescue - tho legally, you should return the kitty to them (They entrusted her care to you and your grandmother and don;t take this the wrong way but you have violated this agreement by keeping the animal when the situation seems to have made her more stressed. Can I ask (sigh - I know I should not do this) how it is you know this cat has these psychological probs? Have you read her medical history? Does she have a history of this? And no cat acts like they do naturally in a shelter - they all are stressed. You are lucky this cat has not become ill with the stress she is under at your grandmother's home. How were you able to adopt a cat if you have no home of your own? I am not suggesting that in itself is a bad thing - we all go thru times like that in our life when we are growing up and for whatever reason, need help. But no reputable rescue would adopt a cat to someone in your situation? Did you tell them - as you did me - that your grandmother loves cats? Did they even interview your grandmother? There is something wrong either with the shelter or with this story.

You need to let someone rescue this cat again - as she once was- so that she can find a family who truly wants her. In the right circumatances, she may well blossom. It's entirely possible that your grandmother's age or health problems have placed her in an untenable situation and you should also be looking to get her help as well. If she is senile, she may not even realize what she said or did to this cat. And this is unfair to both of them. Bring the cat to the rescue and tell them the truth!! It is the only way they can help the cat. I don't honeslt think in your situation that you can!
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  #30  
Old November 7th, 2005, 08:28 PM
shelly41 shelly41 is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Thalia is Crazy
My black kitty cat Tragic was an indoor/outdoor cat.
(Not because I wanted it that way, but because I live with my grandmother and she is unreasonable! It's her house, her rules.)
She dissapeared in April
From thread: indoor outdoor cats
Did your Cat return?

Push the palm of your hand into the cat's face and say "No!" - to discourage biting. This is a suggestion from catchow.com
http://www.catchow.com/askamentor_2.aspx
This is a wonderful site about cats. I have a cat that hated to be picked up, she hissed at us and acted like she wanted to be left alone. We tried a different way with her. Everytime we walked by her we petted her and talked sweet to her. Now she follows us around and sits in our lap and enjoys us loving her.
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