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Old April 7th, 2005, 02:18 PM
Shamrock's Avatar
Shamrock Shamrock is offline
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Location: B.C.
Posts: 1,485
Cats the Musical - Featuring real cats

CATS - The Musical" was the longest-running show on Broadway. The show romanticised the lives and habits of Britain and America's most popular pet. But even with the lively dancing and popular songs, "CATS" didn't capture the true-to-life behaviour of our feline companions. Below is a list of how "CATS" could more accurately portray the true essence of domestic felines.
Audience members enter the auditorium only to find their seats had been clawed and covered with fur.
The antagonist in the show is a giant vacuum cleaner.
Sometimes the cast would perform, but sometimes not - depending on their mood.
Performers leap off the stage and run up the aisles at the recorded sound of a can opener in the lobby.
The leading character refuses to perform until he had his tummy tickled by the director.
When certain audience members open their playbills, a cast member attempts to lay down on it.
When the curtains open, the cast chase after them and try to catch them.
In the middle of a performance various cast members curl up and go to sleep, even in the middle of a song.
For no apparent reason, cast members randomly run to the lobby, and then back to the stage at top speed. They then continue the play as if nothing has happened.
A special audience member finds a headless bird in his/her seat after the intermission.
Snack bar employees are constantly reprimanding cast members for walking on the counter.
Open the stall door and guess who is drinking from the toilet.
Part of the performance includes the cast climbing and shredding the theatre curtains.
The stage is stained from someone coughing up a hairball and then eating it.
Performers find sand in the lobby ashtrays and - well, you can guess.
The understudy leaves a wet patch on the aisle carpet ‘in protest’.
The show has several intervals to allow cast members to "bathe" themselves.
Most of the final act consists of the cast just staring at the audience.
The big finale features a giant ball of yarn, feathers on a pole, and stray strands of dental floss.
Theatre patrons waiting outside the stage door after performances get their legs rubbed, if they are lucky.
Cast members never cash their salary cheques, they just play with them.
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Old April 7th, 2005, 04:21 PM
chico2's Avatar
chico2 chico2 is offline
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Join Date: Jan 2004
Location: Oakville Ontario
Posts: 26,591
Shamrock,thats cute,except cats would never eat their furballs,at least mine would not...cats are finicky eaters
I saw the real production,still to this day,I cry hearing the song "Memory"about the old unwanted scruffy cat :sad:
"The cruelest animal is the Human animal"
3 kitties,Rocky(r.i.p my boy),Chico,Vinnie
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Old April 7th, 2005, 04:33 PM
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Sneaky2006 Sneaky2006 is offline
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Join Date: Jun 2004
Location: PA
Posts: 2,006
My cats don't eat their furballs, or other vomit... just each others, YUCK!

Cute story...
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