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Old June 29th, 2005, 01:09 AM
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Shamrock Shamrock is offline
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Happy Cat/Sad Cat

Five months ago I adopted my 2-yr old male Zack ( neutered) He's a great cat - happy, healthy and well adjusted. We're delighted with him in every way - except for one issue. I'd posted on this about a month ago, and it's still a BIG problem that disturbs me highly.
He views my 5 yr-old spayed female cat as some kind of moving target- and without fail, puts the run on her the moment she comes into view.
She seems a nervous wreck with the constant chasing and tackling. (it doesnt help that she is half his size)
I run after him, clapping my hands and scold him for this - spray him with a water bottle when I can catch him. I try to engage him in playful activities as he has LOTS of energy. It isnt changing a thing,.. discouraging.

I keep them seperated as much as possible - her food, water and a litterbox are in a spare bedroom where she spends most of her days. She used to like joining in with any activity, hanging out. I call her the white phantom now, only see her flitting by quickly or carefully peeking around corners.. poor thing.
In the warm summer evenings, I've always brought my cats out into the back yard with me. (high fence) Time to play and run around - their "happy hour"
I tried this tonight, but he instantly chased her off. Behind the garden shed she ran..and stayed. :sad: This really made me feel bad - she cant have any fun anymore, always seems to be nervously, looking over her shoulder for an ambush. If he isnt put away from her, one comes too - sending her right back to her retreat.
Zack gets along very well with my other male cat and the dog - and with us.
I dont know what is is with Miranda - I'm sure no expert on cat behaviour. He IS exuberant, but not agressive. Yet- this seems like a type of "bullying", and that is why it bothers me so.
I'm responsible for my animal's health and wellbeing, It's getting hard to deny the negative effects on the quality of her life as the months go by, and no change for the better.
I'm actually going to talk to my vet about this tomorrow. Not sure what she can suggest, but dont know who else to ask - or what else I can do...
I thought it wouldnt hurt to ask here for any thoughts you might have too?
Do you think that this might still change between them, or unlikely now after five months? I love all my cats dearly, want my home to be a safe, secure haven for them - where they can live in reasonable happiness and contentment.

What's troubling me is I dont have this now - for all of them.
Am I doing right by Miranda, clearly pretty unhappy in her home now?
Or am I unfairly subjecting her to daily stress,.. the cost to her too high..
I'd hate to think that it was..

Maybe cats cope better than I think in these instances.
I worry a lot..
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Last edited by Shamrock; June 29th, 2005 at 01:15 AM.
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Old June 29th, 2005, 01:19 AM
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Sneaky2006 Sneaky2006 is offline
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Quote:
I keep them seperated as much as possible - her food, water and a litterbox are in a spare bedroom where she spends most of her days. She used to like joining in with any activity, hanging out. I call her the white phantom now, only see her flitting by quickly or carefully peeking around corners.. poor thing.
I don't want to take your thread (as this is the first time I am saying this on the board) but we had to rehome Yukon mainly because of this very thing, except it was the dog making all of the cats feel that way. It is very depressing to once have them all romping together to having them look paranoid like something is following them. We tried for about the same amount of time, maybe a bit more and we saw no change for the better either.
Just remember you're not alone. I wish we could all keep the peace in our homes but sometimes I think teenagers would be easier to raise!
Good luck to you with whatever you decide. :love:
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Old June 29th, 2005, 07:30 AM
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Copper'sMom Copper'sMom is offline
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I've had the same situation in my house as well except I have a cat and a dog(Zoe) chasing CJ. She's a tiny cat and George and Zoe always chase her. She has always been skittish and likes to hide but over the years she has come out of her shell a little. She only comes around when all is quite. I have always worried about her as she used to live in my bedroom! She wouldn't come out - even when it was just her and Copper and myself living together.

George and Zoe are both learning to leave her alone. Although, George is missing right now :sad: and Zoe is slowly learning. If Zack is being a real pain in the butt, can you try isolating him once in awhile so Miranda can come out and socialize?

One cat we had growing up, whom now I have custody of - Mookie, is about 18 years old. She has always been a nasty cat towards everyone and all the other animals. She wouldn't chase them but she wouldn't let them walk by her either without taking a swipe or a hiss!

If I were you SHamrock, give it more time. Just try to make xtra special time for Miranda and if need be, put Zack in a room so he won't bother her.

OH my Sneaky, Yukon is gone? Sorry to hear that!
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Old June 29th, 2005, 08:07 AM
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Shamrock,I am sorry to hear this is still going on,I had a similar problem with Chico when Vinnie arrived,but it's now turned around and Chico will take no bull from Vinnie
I wish your little girl would do the same,but girl-kitties are often a bit more skittish..
It might turn around as they get older,Vinnie and Chico can sleep beside each other with no problem,but then Vinnie will carefully stretch his paws to touch Chico and the hissing and growling starts,enough to make Vinnie back off,no fights!
The problem is Zack gets a great kick out of the reaction from Miranda,just like bullies in a schoolyard and I have no idea how to fix that,other than giving Zack"time out"on his own and give Miranda extra attention to boost her confidence.
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Old June 29th, 2005, 02:00 PM
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Shamrock, I feel so bad for your little "white phantom". Unfortunately, I'm not sure if anything can be done to stop this behaviour (at least no more then you are doing already!)

I've gone through the same thing. And unfortunately, my skittish Siamese never recovered from the stalking of a rescued Maine Coon (major size difference!!) My poor Siamese spent the last few years of her life looking over her shoulder.

Minnow (new Siamese) made up for the unfortunate circumstances the my last Siamese faced by becoming the chaser of the Maine Coon. It wasn't so bad because the Main Coon wasn't scared, she just didn't want to be chased! As Minnow matured they got along much better and became cuddle buddies.

I hope that your little female doesn't get picked on forever. Give her lots of extra cuddles and some alone time, if possible.

If it's really bad, the only other thing I think you can do is put a harness and leash on Zack so that you can stop him if he tries to chase after the female. It's not really a solution but it might give her some peace!
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Old June 29th, 2005, 03:10 PM
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Peace out, cats!

Thanks, everyone, for your suggestions and input.
So sorry to hear that it didnt work out with Yukon, Sneaky, this must have been extremely difficult and painful for you

Coppersmom, I didnt know George was missing? I am so sorry to hear that... and hope he returns soon!

Well, I'll give it more time to dissuade Zack from doing what he's doing. I was VERY discouraged last night - Miranda hiding out, looking so .. frustrated.( if a cat can look that way) I feel sorry for her and guilty too. I did it, didnt I?

Its some encouragement to know that time can sometimes can in fact change the dynamics betweeen them.
Though he is the "offender" I think the root cause stems with Miranda - some feline interaction that I dont understand.
I say this as its the second time I've encountered this problem with her.
I see now that she doesnt tolerate other adult cats-at all. She initially gives out very hostile vibes, hissing and spitting in an attempt to drive the new cat out. Somehow, as times goes on.. SHE becomes the one who is picked on, driven out, and in exile. I've no clue why this happens, but she appears to be a target for bullying. She's a tiny 5 pounds, but I dont think that factors in.

I thought her issues were with female cats,that she'd be ok with a male.
That was my mistake - bringing in any new cat.
I will never, ever adopt another cat while I have Miranda, its not fair to either. I'm giving her a session of special attention and affection each day .. and she is very receptive of this. ( as long as its in "her" room) where she feels safe.
But Zack is here now, and we love him too.
Maybe he'lll mellow out and lay off her. Thats all I want - that all she wants.
I'll try stepping up the consequences a notch - more time outs, and for longer periods, more water sprays. He runs from my scolding words, so he seems to know he's done "something"
Zack is a beautiful purebred, (Ragdoll) young, healthy and clean. He would be a good candidate for a successful rehoming as a very desirable and very adaptable cat.
But this thought is something that causes me great distress..and I hope it wont come to that.
Wih one exception, we are happy to have him in our home -his home - what was to be his forever home. And he is happy to be here.
I'll do everything to avoid a change to this plan. pawprint:
I am not sure how long I should keep trying, though.
The window for this option gets smaller and smaller, each day he steals my heart more. :love:
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Last edited by Shamrock; June 29th, 2005 at 03:13 PM.
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Old June 29th, 2005, 03:32 PM
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I think we all feel the pull on our heart strings when you tell us this. Wish I had a solution for you. If I ever find out something new I'll definitely post it.

Sport is the same way with Clio but, she set him inline early on. Once I saw her run up the couch and push him off the back. He still pesters but, she can hold her own. Still I find myself scolding him at least a couple times a week.

Hope everything works out for the best.
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Old June 29th, 2005, 03:38 PM
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Awww Shamrock,I hope you don't even have to think of rehoming that beautiful,cat...you never know in what kind of home he would end up :sad:
When I got Vinnie,I actually did not want another cat,Rocky and Chico were in perfect harmony..but I just had to take him.
After a couple of weeks of trying to get my cats to adjust,one night I just tearfully called the people who found Vinnie to come and get him,I could not deal with it anymore.But the next morning I called back and said,no,this is his home,we'll work on it...and it did improve,although Chico will never like Vinnie.
I know you feel for little Miranda,she too is gorgeous...but hopefully,Zack will improve.You just have the 2 cats,right?
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Old June 29th, 2005, 04:58 PM
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Chico, arent you SO glad that you went back for him? It's great that Vinnie and Chico are ok now, even if its just a "truce" - it works! Its VERY stressful to see them in mortal combat all the time, isnt it?

I do have another male cat, Chico, my himalayan Basil. He is an extremely docile boy who gets on with everybody.That's why I thought she would be ok with another male. She doesnt like him either - never did. He came here as a kitten... and I thought she would "mother" him? Ha! She was hissing and swatting at him. Not HER kitten...(she is spayed, never had any)

But as he grew, they worked out an understanding. She is the queen and that is that. :queen: He steps aside for her to this day.

Zack came full grown and full of spunk, a different cat totally. Not only will he not defer to her - he's dethroned her. and she is in seclusion.

I hope too that it doesnt come to hard choices, Chico.
IF it did - I would ONLY consider rehoming Zack to the home of a relative, friend or neighbour. A place where I could see him from time to time, and confirm with my own eyes that he was being cared for properly and with love.
And where I could know that if they couldnt care for him any longer.. I could take him back.
And- I dont know of anyone, most having cat families of their own.
So, I will hope for a truce too...
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Last edited by Shamrock; June 29th, 2005 at 05:11 PM.
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Old June 29th, 2005, 08:05 PM
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WOW Shamrock! Your Miranda sounds exactly like my CJ!! Tiny, has her own room, skittish, hissing and spitting at the othr cats and the list goes on! Spooky!
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Old June 29th, 2005, 09:51 PM
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Shamrock...is that Zack???That is the cat I meant,he is absolutely gorgeous!!
I never had to go and get Vinnie back,I called them back before they came to pick him up.He was actually not the problem,Chico was...it was very stressful to listen to hissing and screaming all the time...but it passed and we now have relative harmony.
I hope for Zack's and Mirandas sake they can kiss and make up...
I've had many cats in my lifetime,but only one female,she was a little Tortie named Cookie and boy,was she spirited I believe that female cats are not as calm and layed back as males,but of course,I only ever had one female,so I might be wrong.
I wish Miranda would just turn around and put Zack in his place,I am sure he would cower if she stood her ground instead of hiding,but how do you tell her that...anyways,Good Luck!!
Here's Vinnie in all his glory!!
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Last edited by chico2; June 29th, 2005 at 10:07 PM.
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Old June 30th, 2005, 12:19 AM
JenSteele JenSteele is offline
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I'm assuming both cats are "fixed". Do they both have their claws? It sounds to me like the new guy is wanting to be "top dog".

We have a dog - Lily - and two cats. When we first brought Jim, the nutball, home he would not stop jumping on Gracie (who's now 16). He's been with us for 8 years now and every once in a while he gets in his head that Gracie MUST play with him. After 8 years Gracie has learned a good long hiss does the trick and she doesn't run from him. Gracie trained Lily the same way without us having to interfere at all.

Cats, just like dogs, have to sort out their pecking order. You can show your cats who has more seniority just by the order you feed them in, who gets a treat first etc... The oldest female cat is usually the one who will announce Queen of the Universe to every living thing in your home .. So my suggestion is show the new cat that the current cat has the throne. Don't make the Queen share her toys, her favorite nap spots, her food, or your attention - everyone in order of seniority. The new guy usually learns that the cat who was there first is the boss.

Hope that helps
Jen

That's Jim - I'll post a pic of Gracie tomorrow
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Last edited by JenSteele; June 30th, 2005 at 12:24 AM.
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Old June 30th, 2005, 12:39 AM
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The animals in my house get along nicely now, but it seriously took my middle cat, age 7, over 6 monthsto forgive me for bringing Justice(dog) home. Haylee wouldn't come near me, and would hiss i Justice even LOOKED at her
They now get along, Haylee will rub up against Justice when no human is giving her attention.

Dallas, the new lil boy, now 14 weeks, he's a lil leeian and I shoulda name him Kaos. He will not leave my older cat, Zeppo alone. but Zep is a pushover, and just fights with him..when she is sick of him she gets up and walks away. Haylee, doesn't bother to even try to amuse him, she hisses up a storm.
All the animals looked over their shoulders for thefirst few weeks with him .. now the only one that does so is Justice, as Dallas thinks Justice is his mommy. lol
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