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  #1  
Old January 14th, 2013, 03:33 PM
Jull Jull is offline
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Unhappy is there something wrong with me?

A few weeks back I had posted about my furkid, (yorkie mix) who has been having trouble adjusting to the new puppy we brought home at the beginning of December, we are still having problems, my older dog who has always been the sweetest dog I have ever met, has started to intentionally bite the puppy's legs at all times! so it scares me that no matter what we try, things will keep escalating between them, so I am still thinking about re-homing the puppy? (we have been doing a lot of reading and practicing all the tips on how to deal with a new puppy)

On the other hand, I spent a lot of time thinking about it this weekend, I've had a couple people that were interested in taking the puppy, but after a couple simple questions about their lives, I replied with a big fat No... neither seem like the kind of homes I would want for him, I want the best of the best for him obviously. Then, I started thinking about it really hard, why do I want to find him a new home, yet nobody is good enough for him?

Yes, it is because it breaks my heart that both little guys are not getting along, then I started to ask my self how I felt about the whole thing? I think maybe I was really not emotionally ready to get a second dog , I love him, how could you not? he has the sweetest little face (see pics below) but I feel no bond to him at all, when I think about finding him a new home I feel like a horrible human being for doing that to him, on the other hand I miss the days when it was just my oldest, and how much easier things felt, for example we do a lot of road trips to visit family so travelling with 2 dogs is a different story; I also cannot stand the way he looks at me when I am playing or holding the puppy, I just feel torn all over the place, and I keep wondering if there is something wrong with me?

I have a very special bond to my oldest or maybe I am too attached to him, but when I see him hurting I hurt too. And that is when I think, yes I have to find the new puppy another home, so nobody gets hurt.

When I was a kid I had pets all the time, several at a time, and never felt this way. But I don't know... I just feel like there is a connection missing, and I don't want to take anything away from my oldest either, does that make sense at all?

I think I may not be making much sense at all! and please do not judge me but I needed to vent , I really do care about both of them, and my main concern is both of their well being, but I just couldn't stop thinking about it - he doesn't feel like my "kid" and at the same time I think nobody is good enough to take him home either. I don't want one to feel hurt and replaced, and I don't want the puppy to feel like the "ugly duckling" either.

I really don't know what to do, I don't think I have ever felt this confused in my life

this is the puppy -
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  #2  
Old January 14th, 2013, 04:09 PM
Barkingdog Barkingdog is offline
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can you afford to have a dog behaviorist go to your house so they can see just what is going on with the two dogs and you? Maybe your older dog is picking up your mixed feeling about puppy and think he need to protect you.
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Old January 14th, 2013, 04:48 PM
Longblades Longblades is offline
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I would never criticize you for rehoming a puppy that is in danger from your other dog. Sometimes dogs just don't get along. Sometimes you could work through it if only you had the knowledge, time, money or maybe all three at once.

I have a wild thought. Are you sure both dogs are healthy? Your older dog might have any number of ill health problems that make him less tolerant of a youngster.

The puppy might have health problems and the older dog senses them. I have known a perfectly nice dog to attack a newly met one-eyed dog for instance. Now that's an obvious ailment with the one dog but the same thing is known to happen with other health problems we can't see. Sometimes dogs get rid of less fit members due to some age old instinct kicking in to seize an opportunity to get rid of a competitor. In wild animals it would be to remove a competitor from breeding or eating rights but in our mix of human/dog society it could be guarding the resource that dispenses food and attention, you in other words. Just kinda pondering out loud here.
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Old January 14th, 2013, 05:15 PM
Jull Jull is offline
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Barkingdog - maybe he does sense that I have all these mix feelings, he always knows when I am sad and gives me kisses like there is no tomorrow.

Longblades - as far as I know and can tell, both of them are very healthy, puppy actually just had his 3rd shots and vet check this weekend, and he is doing well. As for my oldest, he is really good as well, except for, hmmm... it looks like is reverse sneezing problems, but it happens often, sometimes when he is stressed, others when he just wants attention. A while back we had him checked, because its very scary and had Xrays done and the Dr though it could just be a small infection or allergies so they gave us meds for both. But it is still happening, thankfully I have found a homeopathic Dr. in the city now and have an appointment coming up for him to check on that, (I have never been big on meds and chemical stuff for my body, so I want to keep my dogs as natural as possible too). Well, I rumbled a little bit here, but yes they are both pretty healthy.
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Old January 14th, 2013, 07:30 PM
Barkingdog Barkingdog is offline
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It bet this has to be very stressful for the puppy too, I guess you could set a date in how long you want to try and have the 2 dogs get long and if they are still not working out I would try to find a new home for the puppy. It is easier to find a puppy a new home than an older dog so I would not wait too long . The puppy could develop some bad traits living in a stressful situation too long.
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Old January 15th, 2013, 12:37 PM
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Dog Dancer Dog Dancer is offline
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Jull, I can imagine it's very stressful trying to figure out what is best. If you decide to rehome your pup, please consider using a reputable rescue to do so. They are very well versed in proper screening of potential owners. Also, do not give the dog away whatever you do. Sell the dog. Set a fee that is high enough so that only serious pet owners who are able to care for the dog would consider taking him. A free pet could become bait in a dog ring, or food for a snake. Not trying to scare you, just want to make sure you don't end up regretting another decision further down the road. Rescues can be a great resource, but you have to be careful and do your homework on them as well.
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Old January 15th, 2013, 01:03 PM
Jull Jull is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Dog Dancer View Post
Jull, I can imagine it's very stressful trying to figure out what is best. If you decide to rehome your pup, please consider using a reputable rescue to do so. They are very well versed in proper screening of potential owners. Also, do not give the dog away whatever you do. Sell the dog. Set a fee that is high enough so that only serious pet owners who are able to care for the dog would consider taking him. A free pet could become bait in a dog ring, or food for a snake. Not trying to scare you, just want to make sure you don't end up regretting another decision further down the road. Rescues can be a great resource, but you have to be careful and do your homework on them as well.
Yes I feel the same way, the way I look at it, if you cannot afford to pay for a dog (or any pet) how can you afford to take care of him properly? so I would absolutely not just give him away. I am trying to keep my self relaxed and not rush into any decisions, so I am doing a lot of thinking and carefully reviewing the situation, like you said I wouldn't want to rush into something and then regret it and then I would feel even worse! but also like Barkingdog said, I wont wait forever and then decide to give him a new home when he is older, that would be very unfair.

Not saying that people who get their fukids for free don't take care of the properly, I should clarify, but not all do unfortunately.
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Old January 15th, 2013, 01:09 PM
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Dog Dancer Dog Dancer is offline
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I would also be very careful because he's probably not neutered yet. Someone could take him and breed him unethically. I only say this to you because years and years ago when I was much younger I rehomed a dog of mine who just didn't seem happy in our home. He was a wanderer, about 6 months old and not neutered. I gave him away to one family who immediately lost him. A few days later he was returned to me as my tag was still on him. I kept him for a while longer and then someone who had seen him the first time I was rehoming him called me back and I gave him away, despite the fact I said I would not after he was found the first time. The fellow said he lived on a farm... blah blah, how would I know. I didn't know enough to check his credentials, address, talk to a vet, anything. To this day I feel I may have let this boy down, but I'll never know. So go cautiously into this Jull, it's not an easy undertaking, which is why I suggest a rescue group to help you out if you decide to rehome him. But do take your time, things may work themselves out yet. Oh, he is very darn cute!
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Old January 15th, 2013, 01:57 PM
Jull Jull is offline
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that is a scary and sad story; but you could not have known that is also what I keep thinking about as well, there is so many bad nature people out there, even if they seem very "normal", you just never know. Now days, you cannot be careful enough.

he is adorable for sure! and he has the saddest puppy eyes look... it just melts your heart.
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