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Old September 16th, 2006, 10:59 AM
stevie.uk98 stevie.uk98 is offline
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Busters story, did i do the right thing was there anything i could have done

buster my beloved dog was, is my best friend iv never been popular or had many mates, but when i was 6years old i found him, i found my best friend he was a 7week old Springer spaniel puppy, he was the only brown and white pup from a litter where all the rest where black and white, i loved him from the beginning.

iv spent everyday with him since, when i was a kid i played with him for hours building huts, throwing balls, wrestling over a stick, and when i was a little older i took him for massive walks up countryside and mountains, through rivers and forests. every where i went he went with me and every where i wanted to be he was there. I loved him so much and he never showed me nothing but affection

when i was older still and went to secondary school i stopped playing with him as much i still walked him everyday without exception but usually i didn’t spend more than 20mins a day playing with him, the massive cross country walks stopped all together. but recently in the last few years iv learned who my true mates are and I realised that i was ignoring one of my best. so i started to play with him again he was just as lively as he had been as a pup,

when my auntie died my mum took in her dog he is a lovely white bichon fries a real charmer who can win over anyone’s heart, and he sure did everyone started to pay attention to the new dog because he was a loveable house pet who could stay with you all day and night if ya wanted, not like buster who stayed outside and smelled terrible whether he was wet or not,

so it went back to being me and buster against the world once again, and I loved it the long walks started up again the last was only a few weeks ago when we had some good weather, he was getting a little older and we had to take things at a slightly slower pace. Everything was great up until 5 days ago when he went off his food at first I wasn’t worried he usually did this now and then but would always eat the next day, so when he didn’t I got a little worried I started to feed him my dinner, chicken ,beacon ,ham, all the things dogs love but he would only pick at them or eat just a little

I noticed a few days ago that he was walking slower and closer to me than normal, I honestly just thought it was a bug that would pass and hed get better. Yesterday he could barely walk at all I was moving at a snails pace and he was struggling to keep up, I had to stop the cars long enough for him to cross the road. At home he found it difficult to even stand I knew something was seriously wrong then, I stayed with him and petted him in his bed as I had done the night before and begged him to get better. I even prayed something I never do, I went into the house and cried slowly pleading for god to make him better.

I couldn’t sleep that night so went back outside to him lying in bed struggling to turn over I knew he hadn’t eaten in days so I got the only thing in the fridge that was a tin of tuna and put it into a dish for him I sat it in his bed and tried to hand feed him but he wouldn’t take it I left the dish and went to bed. The next day early in the morning my ma woke me up saying buster cant get up I went outside to find him lying beside his water dish on the wet ground his paws and tummy soaked , I checked his bed and saw that he had tried to eat the tuna but dropped most of it , I lifted him up and brought him to the front garden where it was sunny and warmer. My dad came up and we drove to the vets I held him in my arms the entire time asking him begging him to feel better . we told his story and they said they wanted to do tests, he needed to be held for a few hours observation I left him not knowing if hed make it or not I was devastated. We got the call back saying it wasn’t good news and drove back to see him

i was forced to put my 12year old Springer spaniel down a few hours ago everyone including the vet said it was unlikely he would recover from renal disease (kidney failure), too far gone. but he only got ill a few days ago and he has always been lively and fit. just 4 days ago he was perfect, . I was the only one who didn’t want to give up, i need to know if anything could have been done. here is his blood works
ALB 38 .....25-44
ALP 40 .....20-150
ALT 65 .....10-118
AMY 1576* ....200-1200
TBIL 5 ....2-10
BUN >64* ....2-9
CA++ 2.54 ....2.15-2.95
PHOS 6.45 ....0.93-2.13
CRE 893* ....27-124
GLU 9.7* ....3.3-6.1
NA+ 140 ....138-160
K+ 4.1 ....3.7-5.8
TP 80 ....54-82
GLOB 42 ....23-52

PLEASE DONT SPARE MY FEELINGS be completely honest and if it possible could you describe what these readings mean, i really need to know if anything could have been done now or earlier when he first went off his food i thought i was doing the right thing at the time because he seemed to be suffering but now all i can think about is that i should have fought, i should have made him fight.

i was with him at the end when the vet put him down. im a typical 19 year old guy who would rather take a punch than cry in public. My brother took of his collar and my mum and dad petted him but as he lay there looking at me trying to get up when i petted him, i broke down i fell to the floor beside him just so i could hold him, comfort him and tell him im sorry ,so sorry. i asked everyone to leave us just so i could cuddle him in the last few moments as i held him and cried he passed away never taking his eyes off me. I begged for more time but was escorted out of the vets by my parents and started to drive away but before we left the car park I jumped out and ran back aging, he was still lying there on the floor I cried more than I have ever before in my life and told him, told everyone, that he couldn’t leave me he just couldn’t

I came home to do research on kidney problems and found this website like I said im a typical guy who wont cry in front of people so when I was comforted by my family I just blocked all my emotions and refused to speak a few minuets ago my mum went outside and lifted his dog dish and closed his door that’s when I knew I needed to let it out I need to tell my story I needed to know if there was anything I could have done I needed to make sure that I would never forget my best friend


thank you so much

Last edited by stevie.uk98; September 16th, 2006 at 11:07 AM. Reason: BETTER UNDERSTANDING
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Old September 16th, 2006, 11:34 AM
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badger badger is offline
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I'm sure everyone who reads your post will want to reach out and give you a big hug. Mourning our friends is normal, even if it is in private, you must let yourself cry. Soon you will remember the good times and how much pleasure you both took in your rambles and the way his coat smelled when it was wet and his absolute fidelity.

It is never a good sign when a dog stops eating and perhaps (BIG perhaps) you might have been able to help him if the vet had seen him earlier. But it is more than likely that by the time he stopped eating he was in the final stages of his disease and beyond repair. Letting him go was the kindest thing you could have done.

If you came here for a good beating, you won't get it. We have all been through this experience and wondered if we did enough (or sometimes too much, not wanting to let them go). So hang in there, it may not seem like it now, but the happier memories will come.

Last edited by badger; September 17th, 2006 at 09:39 AM.
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Old September 16th, 2006, 02:02 PM
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chico2 chico2 is offline
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Stevie,go ahead and cry,you have me in tears,just from reading yours and Busters story:sad:
You've lost a friend whom you loved and yes,most of us here have been through it,me several times..
There are always doubts and regrets,but as far as Buster,he is now without pain and at peace,please remember that and allow yourself to grieve,crying for the loss of someone you love,makes you so much more of a man:love:
Buster
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Old September 16th, 2006, 02:46 PM
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we3beagles we3beagles is offline
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Please believe me when I tell you that everyone who has to put their dog to sleep in the end questions whether they did the right thing or not. Please let these feelings of guilt go and mourn your friend safe in the knowlege you did what only a really strong friend could. Give him a new life free of pain and full of happiness. In the end my dog was in a coma from which he wasn't coming back and even I questioned if I did the right thing. I know it feels so very wrong, but I'm telling you it was the only thing you could do.
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Old September 16th, 2006, 03:54 PM
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meb999 meb999 is offline
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You did the right thing, if you're looking for someone who'll beat you up, I agree with Badger, you won't find it here.

It's hard having your pet put down. you always have doubts as to what more you could have done. You were with him until the end, and i'm sure that meant more to him than anything in this world. He wouldn't want you beating yourself up.

Our pets look to us to release them from their pain. If the vet said nothing more could be done and your dog was in pain, then it would have been selfish to keep him alive.

Take the time to mourn. Losing a beloved pet is very hard. If everyone cared about their animals like you cared, the shelters wouldn't be full of abandoned pets. Buster was very lucky to have such a caring owner.
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Old September 16th, 2006, 07:18 PM
stevie.uk98 stevie.uk98 is offline
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thanks

iv spent the entire day remembering and grieving buster, i have hundreds of photos but i lost it when i saw these, its only been 12 hours and i miss him so much already





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Old November 23rd, 2006, 05:26 AM
rosti rosti is offline
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Oh My G__!!!!

check out http://www.marvistavet.com/html/body...l_failure.html for sample of normal - severe blood panels. I am awaiting copy of my pet's panel. He has undergone euresis past 3 days.
Hard to say if 4 days sick or just noticed for 4 days, often symptoms dont show until later. Why were you forced? just curious cuz i am in similar predicament, well, not being forced or suggested to put down pet as relatively painless end in itself although some of the attending complications if existing - though our case insofar absent, can be painful. But moreso similar in that I am told my pet has renal failure. I have also heard CRF is often misdiagnosed as babegiosis tick disease so i am currently exploring that as well.
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Old December 1st, 2006, 09:59 AM
debolm debolm is offline
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Buster's lab work

I read your posts and it broke my heart, as I have called out for my pets that died. I am a woman, but I too try to hide my sometimes overwhelming emotions for them. They are our family and mostly the best part of family, yet I feel people will say what's wrong with you get over it, so I too grieve in private. I looked at Buster's labs. I'm a R.N. , so bear in mind I'm comparing it to human values, but a lot of it is similar. Not only was Buster in kidney failure, but his liver enzymes were mostly extremely elevated and his blood sugar was up. Some of it surely had to do with not eating, however they were quite high. This could suggest many things, but cancer rates pretty high on the list. I too lost my beloved cat to liver cancer. I too felt alot of guilt because I didn't give him as much attention after my babies came. I really think you did all you could for your Beautiful Buster and he knew you loved him. As for your missing Bishon, how about putting flyers out to your local groomers. If someone found him and goes to get him groomed, they may recognize him. All the best from :love:
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Old January 19th, 2007, 04:57 AM
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nikki4 nikki4 is offline
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time will heal you

Dear Stevie
I was really young when I got my 1st dog who also was a liver and white Eng. Springer Spaniel her name was Patchess. She was 11 when she had a tumor that ruptured on her spleen. I was devistated.
We didn't know until it was too late and had to have her euthanized.
What you are going through. All the doubt and sadness is normal. That was 15 yrs ago. I still miss her.
Reading your story brought all that back for me. I so understand what you are going through. I felt exactually like you do.
You made the right desicion. I know it is so hard. Time will heal you. Believe me it will. Although I still have times like now that I break down and can't seem to get it together, eventually you will remember the good times and it will make you smile. It only shows how much you loved Buster. The memories you created will bring you through the hurt. Buster knows how much love there was in your heart. Don't for one second doubt that. Loving him enough to let him go was the kindest most unselfish thing you could do. He was sick. I try to remind myself of that every time I feel that way.
I stayed up for days, was a zombie from no sleep after she was gone. One thing you can try (that helped me) was to put a photo album together of all her pics from puppy to the last pic I had of her. It made me cry my eyes out but I was able to get all that emotion out till I was drained.
It helped me with closure and whenever I feel sad about it I have something to remember her by. You'll need to do it in your own time.
Cherish those times and know that you gave him a life of love, and know that he loved you too.
You WILL heal, but just be gentle on yourself. Talk to your family about it. It's not wimpy for you to love.
Best Wishes
Nikki
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Old January 29th, 2007, 07:43 PM
stevie.uk98 stevie.uk98 is offline
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dear otter im sorry to hear that ur dog is not well , trust me when i say that i know how worried you must be, not knowing if theres anything u can do or if perhaps you are doing too much.

the only advise i can offer is that, only you know what you want to do, you love ur dog as much as i loved mine and i can only advise that you do what you fell is right.

look for as much information possible that u can about ur dogs condition it will help u make the right choice and u need to know that somethings we can do, somethings we cant, you need to know what you can do and not blame yourself for the things you cant

all my best wishes are with you and sweet chloe


thanks agin for eveyones support coming here helps when im feeling low
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Old September 16th, 2007, 12:49 PM
stevie.uk98 stevie.uk98 is offline
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1 year today

its was exactly 1 year ago today that my buster died. and iv missed him so much everyday since, I was surprised to see this thread was still here after all this time, and I wanted to say a sincere thank you to all those who showed support to me and a thanks the website itself it helped a lot in the first few months, When I wouldn’t turn to anybody else to grieve.

For everyone here who has lost a loved family member you have my sympathy’s, all I can say is that time really does help heal the pain u feel,

Although I still miss him I can now look back on my dog with the fond happy memories we shared, and not just the loss I felt when I said goodbye,

All my best wishes to everyone
steve
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Old September 16th, 2007, 03:46 PM
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chico2 chico2 is offline
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Stevie,thank you for posting again,I am glad you can now think of Buster with a smile on your face
I read your original post just to remind myself and I now have tears streaming down my face,your posts were so very heartfelt,full of emotions.
I am glad you are now ok,time does heal the pain,but the memories never go away.
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Old September 16th, 2007, 04:34 PM
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I think you did everything you could and you should try to recall al lthe wonderful times you shared with him over the years to sustain you at this terrible time. We all mourn our furry friends. They are family after all!
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Old September 16th, 2007, 07:37 PM
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Love4himies Love4himies is offline
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Good to hear you are doing all right, stevie. It is so painful to loose your best friend. Judging by the blood panel there was nothing you could have done. I am glad to hear you can talk about him with a smile on your face now. Any plans to get a new best friend?
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