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Old February 27th, 2017, 05:18 PM
dbora32 dbora32 is offline
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Unhappy Help! Boyfriend with jealous dog and he doesn't believe in it... She is now biting.

Hi. My boyfriend and I have been together for 6 months. L-bombs have been dropped and the talk of a future together has seemed fairy tail-like... Just not to his other girlfriend of 8 years. His Weimaraner. I knew when I met her when I finally came back to his small 1 bedroom apartment for the first time that she was anxious and not very well trained. However, I had dogs before. I thought maybe I could at least help her remember some of the basic commands through some positive reinforcement training. Plus, I thought, what better way to bond with his furry child than to have her associate me with treats? Right? It was the least I could do after he came and stayed the night over at my house a couple of times to keep my cat company while I was out of state for work. (A keeper!)

She never liked us touching at all from the start. I thought this would subside over time as I pointed out to him that her never trimmed, eagle like talons hurt badly when she jumped up and broke blood vessels all over my chest upon entering the apartment or touching him in any way. She also apparently never at all learned the commands "down" or "stay".

Things started to get a bit worse when we started spending more time around each other. He must stop anything we are doing every 45 minutes to an hour to go home and take her out to pee. Needless to say, we have been to one theatre movie ever. She also started trying to get between us on the couch, if we kiss, in the bed, etc etc. He would pet her and say it was cute. I would warn that it seemed a little like jealous behavior toward me and decided to keep an eye on it. He at that time at least started taking measures so that we could be out more than 45 mins to an hour at a time after I made the point that she must be used to it when he is at work all day and then off to the gym by himself for hours.

She is a good sized almost 70lb Weimaraner and, as I said, he does not keep her claws trimmed. This has made co-habitating in the bed impossible. So I had to ask that she not sleep in the bed due to injury. This led to confusion for her because she was allowed when I wasn't there and not when I was. I am now "stealing her place". She started peeing in the house. He started saying it was because we were leaving her too long before potty breaks even if she did it right after being taken on a potty break. I told him that I believe she needs more consistency and it was seemingly making her anxiety worse.

I was now next to him, in her spot, watching movies on the couch. She would start with a few minutes of moping, then get up and stand in front of us staring (I swear without even blinking in true Weim form), and wait for him to scold me away. When this did not happen, and his universe was not yet again revolving around her, she would come up and push physically on him for attention. If I tried to give it to her (which I actually believe in ignoring until the behavior you want appears for rewards) I was nipped. "Haha! How cute! She played with you!" Then he would pet her and reinforce this unhealthy behavior. Now, if she feels like he is not looking at her enough, or if he even goes to the bathroom, she walks over and bites me. Not even a nip anymore if I don't pull away fast enough. She also has now peed on the floor twice from him turning his back on her while I tell her to sit... regardless of my relentless attempts at being the one to give her water or treats. I even have been trying to find activities that are dog friendly (we like hiking and I would love to picnic at a park where a ball can be thrown) sine she does not get anywhere near enough exercise for her breed.

I have tried to send him countless articles and still "She is a good dog!" even though she doesn't even sit anymore until he yells for the third time and has to stand over her. She bit me hard yesterday when I am sure she believed I hid him away from her in the bathroom. She did not break skin, but what if she did that to someone on a walk (she lunges and has no concept of heal). He just chalks it up to her being a Weim. I disagree. I truly believe it is inconsistent hierarchy. He told me to hit her if she bites. I don't believe that is the solution either if he will contradict training in the next moment... Not even 20 minutes after the bite, she is in his face at the couch for more attention, he knows about the bite, and he was trying to hide that he was petting her for being there under the blanket... Apologies if part of this is sounding like relationship woes rather than dog worry... but what if him basically telling her this is ok leads to her biting someone who is not tolerant and takes legal action???? He said he takes the training seriously, but expects me to administer all the reprimands while he quietly gives her what she demands.

She has the rule of the roost when he is not home (much of the day due to work) and has now for 3 years of conditioning to being this way before anyone even entered the apartment aside from the landlord when supervised. He actually told me to "Watch yourself and what you say about my family" yesterday when I had been tired of the biting and moved to a more serious note about her training. This really concerns me that he believes she should go on this aggressive path because she is fine with him and other people that don't actually touch him.

It has been 6 months and no real training is actually happening. Do I give up on it and risk that she gets put down for biting a neighborhood kid in the hall?? I don't know what to do about this.... Let alone what would have to be done to train her to be prepared to meet my cat. He talks about wanting a child at some point. I don't believe this dog could handle that. There are so many other situational examples of this that I am not going to keep listing due to the length already.

Please advise.
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Old February 27th, 2017, 07:58 PM
Barkingdog Barkingdog is offline
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I didn't read your whole , but I am concerned about the dog not getting her nails trimmed . She is going to end up getting an infection if her nails grow into her paw . Poor dog ! Can't you bring the dog to get her nails trimmed ?? Ingrown nails are very painful ,and this could part of why she biting at people .
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Old February 27th, 2017, 11:13 PM
Lynne&Co. Lynne&Co. is offline
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Wow there is an awful lot you have brought up here.

I feel so sad for this poor Weimaraner! It breaks my heart to hear she is being abused and not excercised physically or emotionally. Weims require at least two hours if not more of physical excercise each and every day. They were bred for hunting and if they don't hunt, participate in agility or otherwise get enough excercise then they will not do well emotionally. They are known to suffer from separation anxiety and become destructive to alleviate that pent up energy. It's not common for Weims to be aggressive towards people. The fact that your boyfriend suggests that you hit her makes me wonder if he also hits her? I would bite people too if they hit me.

Weims are extremely attached to their people and need to have very clear and consistent training. If your boyfriend won't or can't follow through with training then this poor pup hasn't got much of a chance. Weims are very clever thinking dogs and will figure out very quickly they can be in charge. They need gentle but consistent handling. Never ask her to do something if you don't plan on following through.

Please research the breed, seek out a trainer and insist your boyfriend attend the training with you and his pup. Everyone needs to be on the same page so this poor Weim has a chance to succeed. It's not that she isn't trained that she isn't complying. It's that she is stubborn and smart enough to know that she can do whatever she wants.

If your boyfriend refuses or denies there is a problem then perhaps the pup needs to be surrendered to a Weimaraner Rescue that will give her the training and care that she deserves.
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Old February 28th, 2017, 09:10 AM
rhynes rhynes is offline
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Put away the idea of training for a moment - I would take a different approach to the situation.

Give him the laws, regulations and consequences surrounding dog bites and the responsibilities of the owner, not something to be taken lightly. Your boyfriend is likely going to end up in some serious trouble at some point - and personally I wouldn't want any part of it.

Understand that you likely won't change the situation, if he's that head strong over his dog...

Weimaraners are wonderful dogs. They need lots of exercise, stimulation and a job. I can only imagine how bored and frustrated the dog is given what you posted.
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Old February 28th, 2017, 09:41 AM
dbora32 dbora32 is offline
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Thanks for the replies

Thank you all. Well he broke up with me after that bite and me getting serious about the action needing to be taken training/hierarchy wise. You were right Rhynes, the situation was not going to change because he claimed I was trying to get between him and the dog. So there is nothing I can do anymore I guess. I feel horrible for the dog.
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Old February 28th, 2017, 10:05 AM
rhynes rhynes is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dbora32 View Post
I feel horrible for the dog.
Your postings show that you're a good person. Sometimes there is nothing you can do. As much as I love my current pup, I wouldn't have a woman play second fiddle to him.

Good luck.
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Old February 28th, 2017, 07:16 PM
Barkingdog Barkingdog is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dbora32 View Post
Thank you all. Well he broke up with me after that bite and me getting serious about the action needing to be taken training/hierarchy wise. You were right Rhynes, the situation was not going to change because he claimed I was trying to get between him and the dog. So there is nothing I can do anymore I guess. I feel horrible for the dog.
This is not true ! You can still report the guy for animal abuse . Someone has to speak out for the poor dog before she does bite someone and will be put down . Pleases be this dog hero !
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Old March 1st, 2017, 09:08 AM
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hazelrunpack hazelrunpack is offline
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I don't think lack of training would qualify as animal abuse in most jurisdictions, Barkingdog. About the best she could do is report the dog as a biter, but the dog didn't break the skin, so there's really no evidence of that. It's a really sticky, sad situation.
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Old March 1st, 2017, 10:58 AM
Barkingdog Barkingdog is offline
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Hazel if the dog had bitten a child the same way she could had really had done some harm to him /she . The poor dog ,she may not be getting abused right now but I have a horrible feeling the guy is going to lose his temper one day and doing something to the dog. The guy is neglecting his dog by not taking proper care of her ,he not having her nails trimmed and neglect is abuse .

Last edited by Barkingdog; March 1st, 2017 at 11:32 AM.
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Old March 1st, 2017, 09:26 PM
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hazelrunpack hazelrunpack is offline
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I agree about the biting. But at this point, I doubt any agency would step in. They can't legally remove an animal because something might happen unless they pass some pretty restrictive laws that wouldn't be good for anyone. Laws are set up to deal with situations that have happened, not situations that might happen.

It doesn't sound like the guy is going to lose his temper--if anything, he's too tolerant of the dogs behavior. Sadly, that won't make him ineligible for dog ownership. He will, likely, end up without human companionship in his old age, though.
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Old March 19th, 2017, 09:19 PM
dbora32 dbora32 is offline
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Hello again, everyone. I thank you all again for your replies. Apparently he found this thread, recognized my screen name, and had quite an overwhelming realization that I was trying to help rather than hinder. After he tried to dive into some positive training techniques, he sadly came to the conclusion that he can't allocate the time the pup really needs. He is heart broken because he knows he needs to give her another home due to it being best for her. I have one contact for a Weimaraner Foundation in the Bay Area. However, I don't know if they can take anymore pups as of yet. Just in case, does anyone have any recommendations in the Bay area of California that take surrenders and/or find them new good homes? It would be great to at least soften the blow with a piece of mind that where she would go is recommended as reputable.
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Old March 27th, 2017, 10:13 AM
rhynes rhynes is offline
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Well, that was an unexpected turn of events...

"Jumped into positive training techniques", yep, the magic bullet that ends up in your foot instead of the dog.

Truth is, a dog with an aggressive history and biting will likely be put down in the future. It's a dog that's going to require time and patience, and it seems this day in age everyone is looking for the quick fix. You can't rehabilitate a dog like this with a bag of treats - it's never been "habilitated". Training has to go from bottom up but unfortunately, many fail trying to apply a top down approach.

I don't know what to tell you.
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