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Old March 7th, 2006, 05:35 PM
.unknown. .unknown. is offline
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No Pets to save your own heart?

I've heard from a person i work with that she would not own another pet, because when they die it's just too painful.

I find this mentality SO PERPLEXING.

I understand that heart ache is harder to deal with for some, but why would you negate the possibility of SO MANY great experiences just to save a few tears when it's that time?

In the case of animals, i really do think it's a strong case for the "It's better to have loved and lost, than to have never loved at all" saying. They bring such wonderful light into our worlds that to never consider doing it again seems so drastic to me.

I can't honestly imagine a life without a furry companion or three to run around and be crazy with.

I understand that not all people think like this, but it makes me feel really sad inside to hear people talk about pets that have passed on, and how much joy they brought and yet they won't give another little friend a chance because they will eventually die.

The same feelings get conjured up when i hear of people who've had to euthanize their dear friends and didn't end up staying with them for their last moments... I am not condemning anyone for doing it, but i just really feel that at that point it's not about YOU, it's about them and helping them go on to a better place with you holding their paw all the way.

I couldn't imagine being sick and scared because i was in this strange place with wierd people around me, and not knowing what was happening....

anyway, just a little rant.


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  #2  
Old March 7th, 2006, 05:43 PM
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I adopted a 14yr old which died on Friday after only having him for 6 weeks, but I would still do it again. No matter how much it hurts when they die, I will always get another. I'm a pet lover for life.
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Old March 7th, 2006, 05:57 PM
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I don't know, but I kind of find that a littlt selfish, it's like they're more concerned about their fellings, then they are about what a difference it can make to a dog to give it a LIFE.
What about all the joy and love before the dog dies? Does that just all go away after the dog passes?

Cathy1, I find what you did amazing! You gave that dog some joy and love in his final days!! your an totally selfless, you did it for the dog, and not your own fellings, or worry about the dog dying!
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Old March 7th, 2006, 06:45 PM
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I know one of these people very well. Although she seems pretty tough, she does not like the idea of a pet that will die eventually. Someone got her a cat about 15 years ago (the cat is still alive) and although she has had years of hapiness with the cat, she still says she would not have got one if it had been up to her. She also will not let her husband get a dog once the cat is gone. I don't get it personally, but I do respect her view. I think that pain is just part of life; you have to take the good with the bad, right?
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Old March 7th, 2006, 06:59 PM
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i took my husband almost 2 years and constant bugging giving him no option for us to get another dog after his buddy died. he finds it too hard to accept death. it took almost a year before he would go upto a strangers dog. funny that in the long run we rescued another airedale
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Old March 7th, 2006, 07:30 PM
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I don't think it's selfish. People can get dogs and cats from breeders too, not just rescue. I think it's just sad. I think dogs and cats give us so much and teach us so much about how to love and how to take advantage to life. I think it's sad when people give that up after losing a pet, especially when I know for me, the best way to get over a lost pet is to cuddle one.

But I think in general, people who haven't grown up with pets and live an animal-less life are missing out too. They judge from the outside and call us nuts for devoting so much time and energy to our pets, but they'll never know why. They'll never feel it.
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Old March 7th, 2006, 07:52 PM
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After my last dog was pts, my hubby said no more I just told him that if you went through life feeling that way you would never marry or have children. No matter what you always end up losing someone that is close to you, life goes on. My hubby couldn't stay with Travis when he was pts, I was angry with him as this dog loved him the most. But I stayed I couldn't let a dog that loved us so much go be pts without one of us there. I thought for all he had given us this was a final thing I could do for him. He went to sleep with me rubbing in his ears and talking to him, at the end I kissed him on the forehead and said bye baby, mummy loves you.
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Old March 7th, 2006, 08:16 PM
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I feel it's my duty to protect and love those who otherwise would be cast aside, no matter how short their lives are in comparison to mine. Part of me will die the day that Peaches and Simon go to the bridge, but I have an obligation to provide a loving home to those abandoned and abused, and will do so again and again and again. I do understand as people get older, it gets harder, my parents are proof of that. While they've offered REPEATEDLY to take Simon and Peach and have taken my brother's puppy on weekends, I know they're still mourning Max and are in no hurry to take on another dog permanently. I do know they will do so soon, my dad needs a companion and my mom needs a furry to split the couch and pizza crusts with. Just a matter of time before they head to the SPCA for another rescue
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  #9  
Old March 7th, 2006, 09:08 PM
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Life without dogs and cats....ooooh noooo. Life would be awful lonely and quiet! Hmmm quiet.....nope, I can live without it. The love we get from our pets is something so special and pure. That woman is missing out on a lot, her loss. We all have had pets come and go, and the memories will live on forever in our hearts and TONS of photos! And they also say pets keep you healthy, as in lower blood pressure I believe. I just know mine keep me happy!!
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Old March 7th, 2006, 09:15 PM
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As Jawert said, it's definitely my duty to give an animal a healthy, warm, loving home. My life is better and I know I'm a better person because of Jesse. She's my pride and joy. When the time comes years from now, I will be right there with her to see her off to the rainbow bridge and will once again open my home.

As for lower blood pressure, I would like to revise that. Blood pressure is lowered once dogs and cats are out of the baby/teenager years.
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Old March 7th, 2006, 09:19 PM
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Oh how true! I forgot about the teenage years... lol!!
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Old March 7th, 2006, 09:58 PM
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Cathy1: Every animal in my house, and there are three forever dogs, two foster dogs, three forever cats, one foster cat and her five teeny babies--all just said, in unison, God bless you and God bless Teddy. You are a beautiful human being.
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Old March 8th, 2006, 05:52 AM
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I refuse to judge anyone for their feelings - we all have experienced different things in our lives and some of us can handle some situations better. I have to admit when my bunny died (and I was so bonded with him,), I said that was it , no more pets - now granted, he died in my arms after having 3 heart attacks. And I had attempted CPR. Even my close friends worried about me for awhile (they did not tell me this till later, lol) since I was sooo upset about losing him. So I can understand her saying that.

In my case, I see death all too often I guess and I hated to deal with it in my own home.

But I found myself drwn to looking at rabbits and still helping the local rescue and decided I would get the love of my life, a Siamese!!! I certainly do not regret that, lol

There mayt well be a time in this person's life when she feels ready - we all need time to mourn and we do not people to judge as we do it, You can help her by understanding where she is coming from and not giving her your opinion, just your support. She may well eventually want another aniinal in time. And if she doesn't, wqell, not all of us can be furparents just as I appreciate it when people realize they were not made to be parents of human children. Maybe she knows her limits.
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Old March 10th, 2006, 07:26 PM
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Maybe it's because I'm pregnant but this thread has got me in tears.... I just love reading from people out there who so selflessly give their hearts and homes to their animals.

I have to admit I have mixed feelings on the subject and I can understand both views.

Herc is only 3, and almost daily I feel a surge of dread and terror through my heart when I think of the time when I will have to part with him. That being said, the countless minutes of joy he brings me FAR outweigh my fear of heartbreak. Every second with him makes it worthwhile. I just can't imagine giving up one day of waking up next to 100 lbs of and a wet nose sticking in my eye.
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Old March 10th, 2006, 07:33 PM
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Congrats on your pregnancy!
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Old March 10th, 2006, 11:05 PM
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I honestly dont know how I will feel, I try not to think about it, Rocky will be seven next month. My daughter and I always had a house full of pets (not dogs though, Rocky is my first dog) but our three cats died within two years. They were all around nineteen. Rocky was still a puppy when they died. It was very sad, and difficult to deal with all three, but having a pittie puppy to take care of still demanded so much of my attention. I realised then though going through what i did with the cats, that it would be absolutely horrific, or ofcourse will be, when I am without Rocky...see I cant even type it. For a while after I lost the cats I felt like I actually may have made a mistake getting a dog cause I love him so much that it scares me. Thinking about it now I would say I would have to get another dog immediately, but not having gone through it, and having gone through losing a human companion I know from that experience that one simply cant predict how one will react to tragedy until it happens. The emotions are always a surprise so I guess theres no telling. I do know friends though, that had the same reaction, no more pets! One of my neighbours dogs died this week and I have a s trong feeling that he will not get another, but I hope that Im wrong!
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Old March 11th, 2006, 06:31 AM
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I have had animals in our home all my life. When I was 15 and left home I convinced my mother to get a cat we drove her to the humane society on Kennedy road where she adopted 'Sammy' the orange cat as he was the loudest one there meowing to get out.

My Mom was a real loner , so her and Sammy became fast pals, he was a very nervous cat and would hide whenever someone came over to visit her, everyone called him 'The Phantom cat'

Sammy soon learned that I was a regular visitor and seemed to stay to long for him to hide out and I seemed just as kind as Mom so he learned to venture out when he heard my voice and would even eventually let me pet him but would never cuddle with me like he did with Mom.

I was an adopted child, and about 6 months later Mom announced that Sammy was my new adopted brother that Dad would never let her adopt for me. So for 13 years when people asked if I had any siblings I told them "Yes, I have a brother, his name is Sammy, he is orange and white and Mom says he has an attitude similar to mine.

In the end of Sammy's 12th year he became very ill with kidney problems , Mom had him at the vets constantly she was on Social assistance and she was fast putting herself in debt as there was nothing she wouldn't do for her Sammy.

It got to a point where there was nothing more they could do for Sam, he was not eating and was in pain the vet told mom it was time, she looked at the vet in horror and brought Sammy home and called me. When I got there she was in a mess of tears. She informed me of what the vet had said and asked me if I could go and be with Sammy as she just couldn't bear it.

At the vets I took Sammy out of the cage and for the first time Sammy let me hold him and caress him without even trying to get away, (I think he knew it was time) I talked to him for 10 minutes while I held him in my arms and told him he was the greatest brother a girl could have. Sammy went peacefully RIP.:sad:

I understood why Mom couldn't be with Sammy and never asked her why she would not be with him. People handle grief in many ways, it is their pain and they own it, I for one never question someone on how they handle things unless they offer an explanation first.

Mom went through great pain and refused my offering of "Tippy", one of TC's kittens at the time but one day 3 months later I brought Tippy to mom's for a visit. He was a cuddly, loving fluffy black cat with a white tip on his tail and cute as can be. When I left that day Tippy was all comfy in Mom's lap sleeping and thats just where she wanted him to stay.
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Old March 11th, 2006, 08:10 AM
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At one time I've felt that I would be betraying my dog if I got another one (that's how I felt with my childhood dog and it took me a while to warm up to my parents new dog). But in all honesty, after being on this site and experiencing the things that everyone goes through with their pets, I feel I've become a stronger person. I feel it's more of an honor for me to welcome these pets into my home and give them a good life -- for however long it is. I just feel it's my duty. I will never go without a pet.
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Last edited by jesse's mommy; March 11th, 2006 at 10:57 PM.
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Old March 11th, 2006, 02:31 PM
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My first dog died in a car accident. Inky was my dear love and I cried for two days straight. It took me several years before I could face getting another dog. I just wasn't ready. Now we have four furry loves. The dog we adopted after Inky was a dear little dog we called Elvis. Poor Elvis didn't live too long he was killed by some animal (coyote or owl). I had to wait a long time again, before I could face another puppy. Elvis and Inky are still the measures I use for a good dog. My fear now is that I will go before my babies as they are all very young. And incase you wonder, I now have a fenced in space for the little ones so no more cars or animals.

People greave in very different ways and sometimes it takes awhile before you can face that commitment(owning and loving and maybe losing a pet) again.
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Old March 11th, 2006, 10:55 PM
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jesse's mommy
At one time I've felt that I would be betraying my dog if I got another one (that's how I felt with my childhood dog and it took me a while to warm up to my parents new dog).
Im sure that would be part of the emotions I would have to overcome as well.
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Old March 12th, 2006, 01:30 AM
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I felt that way after losing my second rat. It felt like a tribute to him to end my rat ownership with him... But then I got another one... I didn't bond too well with the last one though. I think it had a neurological disorder... It couldn't learn and wasn't social at all. Anyway, after that one, I decided to stop until I had enough room to make them a great habitat..

My point was I see how it could happen. How you could feel like you're betraying your lost beloved animal. That's sort of how I feel about dobies too. The love of my life was a dobie and I could never get another because it wouldn't be fair to the new dobie to be compared to my old doggy and vice-versa.
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Old March 12th, 2006, 07:03 AM
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How many times have we all said or heard...he/she was the best dog ever, there will never be another one like him/her? I know I have said it a time or two myself. And I am probably guilty of "saying no more animals" But here I am with 10 heartbreaks waitng to happen and THEY are now the best dogs and cats at this time, along with all their little quirks. Pets are like people....no two are ever alike! Thats what makes them special!! And as mine pass, if I am able to help one more orphan or abused fur baby...he/she will be the best!! They need us!!!
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