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Old February 16th, 2007, 12:01 AM
magsangel04 magsangel04 is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2007
Posts: 1
My little maggieee :(

Hi everyone! i just found this site tonight and im so glad that i did!

I'm 18 and i just started going to college this year a few hours away from home. About a month and a half after i left, my english setter, maggie (who also went by the nickname "shnuffy" ) started to get very very sick. It was such a shock because she was like 13 years old, and she still looked and acted like she was 4! In fact, i thought she was 4 untill my dad told me she wasnt haha. Well maggie started to get really weak and my parents had no idea what was going on, when my mom would talk to me on the phone about it i just figured she was blowing the whole thing out of proportion, and shnuff was fine. My mom is notorious for making things a bigger deal than they are. But she started to get really really bad in the next couole of weeks.My dad took her to a really good pet clinic, they did an ultrasound and found out she had a tumor on her heart. The tumor was causing fluid to fill up and push against her lungs so she couldnt breathe and it made it really hard for her heart to function. The vet said my dad could leave her there overnight and they could do a procedure to drain the fluid as a temporary cure, but of course they couldnt remove the tumor because it was on her heart. When my dad went to pick her up the next day, she was perfectly fine, acting all goofy and like a puppy. Like nothing had ever happened to her. I was so happy to hear this, and im really optimistic so i thought she would be fine, and most of the times after that first procedure when i came home, she was. She would always greet me at the door, so excited and making the weirdest, funniest "talking noises" (if youre an english setter owner, im sure you know what im talking about). But unfortunately, shes wasnt fine for long.
One of my saddest memories is a weekend when i came home from college to visit everyone, i went to the back door of my house and maggie was just laying there looking at me, trying to wag her tail and act excited. You could tell she was excited, but too weak to do anything about it. I just started to cry, id never seen her like that before. Ill never forget how sad that made me, i knew what was going to happen. My dad explained to me she was sick again, and they were oging to do the procedure. They did it, and she came out acting like a puppy again, but she got sick again in a shorter amount of time than the first time they did the procedure. I hated myself for being away, and i still do today. I started to go home every weekend, just to see her. I loved maggie with all my heart and i still do, i wanted to be there for her as much as i possibly could. The last weekend i saw her, she looked fine. I was just leaving and i hugged her and kissed her on the head for like 20 minutes. She seemed fine the whole time i was home. When i was about o leave i said " Bye shnuffy i loove youuu, dont dieee! Bye babyyy!" And i started to cry a little bit, not because i thought she was actually gonna die, but because i just hated leaving her. I defanitly would not have thought that within the next 4 days, my baby would be gone forever.
My dad called me on wednesday at about 1130, i had just gotten out of a test. He explained to me that maggie got really really bad the night before. They brought her into the emergency clinic at like 1 in the morning. He tried to explain it to me but all i kept asking was if she was dead or not. She was. They decided to put her down because she was just in so much pain, and she probably would have died that night in much more pain if they didnt put her down. I tried to hold it together for as long as i could. My roomate drove me home because my parents didnt want me driving. When we got home i just couldnt help it. I started crying hysterically. I hated being in my house and not hearing her little feet running around, or her weird noises greeting me at the door. I still hate being in my house today becase i just miss her so much.

I just wish i could have been there for her when she needed me. Im still in college but there isnt a day that goes by that i dont think about her. Maggie was my dog, i picked her out from the breeder when i was a little girl, i had her through junior high and high school. We grew up together, and had an unconditional love that every pet owner knows they have with their pet. Its an irreplacable thing that you never forget. I still cry all the time about it because i miss hr so much, but a lot of times i wont admit to it because i dont like to show how extremely upset i still am about it. Im so filled with guilt that i went away, and she was left alone without me. I have no brothers or sisters, she she was kinda like that to me, and i know i was like that to her.

I have a new puppy, and i really love her a lot, but its just so hard adjusting. Im still so sad. I just hope shes happy and she knows how much i love her .
and to whoever reads this whole thing, haha thank you, youre a trooper. It was really hard for me to type this, im pretty buck crying my eyes out rihgt now haha. I just really needed to get this all out:love:
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