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  #91  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:00 PM
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heidiho heidiho is offline
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Princess and Luba thank you,i have every plans on getting a cat or kitten from the shelter out here,and you are so right,i cant see walking in the door to an empty apt...I already did figure two would be a good idea,so they have each other,not sure what the way is to housebreak a kitten???Meaning clawing furniture and the litter box?? God i just wish this didnt turn out like this,i never thought he would have such issues....And you are also right i need a pet i can smother with attention[well not smother] but one that can sleep in my bed and i can play with.................I cant describe how sad i am,he was MY boy......................We would go everywhere together.........Neighbors all knew us,this one lady would always say YOU AND THAT DAMN DOG'...................
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  #92  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:04 PM
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I am sure he would, but i had him help me pay for the emergency room when i took him,and i dont want to ask for help,i need to be able to have a pet i can support myself,i know damien pretty well,and i honestly will never be able to say 100 percent that i will trust him,i have lost the trust in him that i need to have there,and before he does get older i would rather him learn to adjust now while he is young and at a adoptable age that people like..........
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  #93  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:05 PM
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Luba Luba is offline
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So I bet you are worried about what your neighbours will say huh?

Don't worry, forget about it and what they say. Just tell them that Damien is too smart to be a family pet and he's gone off to persue a career.

As for the cats, lets get Damien's situation settled first okey dokey.

Why did u call him Damien?
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  #94  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:09 PM
sammiec sammiec is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by heidiho
I am sure he would, but i had him help me pay for the emergency room when i took him,and i dont want to ask for help,i need to be able to have a pet i can support myself,i know damien pretty well,and i honestly will never be able to say 100 percent that i will trust him,i have lost the trust in him that i need to have there,and before he does get older i would rather him learn to adjust now while he is young and at a adoptable age that people like..........
How can he "learn to adjust"?

Was the emergency room to do with Damien?

You can't trust him? Was that because of the other day?
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  #95  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:10 PM
Goldenmom Goldenmom is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LuckyRescue
I have fostered dogs and then given them up to new homes. One of them I had for 3 months and loved dearly. I shed many tears when she left.

But I KNEW I was doing what was right for those dogs, and was sending them to homes where they would get what I couldn't give them. Not easy, but necessary sometimes.

Very well put! I agree 100%. I like the "necessary sometimes"

Heather
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  #96  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:13 PM
sammiec sammiec is offline
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Heidi, I have posted about this book before, but I don't think it was on one of your threads... it's called Good Onwers, Great Dogs
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg...97517?v=glance

if you can't afford training, there is basic traing methods in there, the books like 15 bucks (US) It's excellent.
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  #97  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:15 PM
Goldenmom Goldenmom is offline
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I am going to disagree with a couple people here. Heidi should NOT get 2 kittens. Why? Because they are expensive to spay/neuter and because they will do damage to the furniture. Heidi needs one cat to start and then maybe another later. See how one does Heidi, ok? I really think you will enjoy a cat and you can surely find one that is very affectionate and keeps you company.

Heather
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  #98  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:16 PM
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Luba that is to weird you said that,cause everyone at work always asks about him,well i am not telling people i work with,cause i dont want to hear there crap,very gossipy here..I just always loved that name,i think it means sweet and harmless,how funny is that......By saying about the adjusting i just think while he is only 6 months old it will be easier for him,than if i was to keep him and he is a year old and we are more attached.....
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  #99  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:18 PM
Goldenmom Goldenmom is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by sammiec
Heidi, I have posted about this book before, but I don't think it was on one of your threads... it's called Good Onwers, Great Dogs
http://www.amazon.com/exec/obidos/tg...97517?v=glance

if you can't afford training, there is basic traing methods in there, the books like 15 bucks (US) It's excellent.

I have that book here at home and I agree, it is a great book! Its obviously too late for Heidi to read this book, as she has made the decision to give Damien to rescue.

Heather
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  #100  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:19 PM
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I am telling you i have read soooooo much on tips about training,i honestly believe i have lost damiens respect in that aspect and i have come to see we are not improving we are getting more problems showing up,i appreciate the thought though..........I just think it is now or never,being with him each day makes it harder and harder...Goldenmom i think when you get one from a shelter here they are spayed first[i will be getting a female] but i see your point about the money thing..
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  #101  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:20 PM
sammiec sammiec is offline
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I agree - one cat first.. and when you get one from the shelter they can be declawed already, so that would save the couch!!!
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  #102  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:24 PM
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glasslass glasslass is offline
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Dogs do remember and mourn. It's been almost a year since our friend John died. Den-Den still won't go into his room and is just recently beginning to be his old self again. It's not about you feeling better. It's about facing reality as to what's best for Damien and what you're doing to him.
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  #103  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:31 PM
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heidiho heidiho is offline
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So are you saying damien will be in mourning that long??I think what will ease my mind is knowing he is fine and not sad ...
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  #104  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:37 PM
sammiec sammiec is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by heidiho
So are you saying damien will be in mourning that long??I think what will ease my mind is knowing he is fine and not sad ...
I don't think that Damien would blame you for giving him up. After seeing those photos of him jumping and playing with those other dogs..... I think he would remember you but he would be SOOOO happy if he could do that ALL day long every day, wouldn't you!?!?
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  #105  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:37 PM
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I think i am gonna breakdown,it is taking everything i have got,not to start losing it,and have all the tears pour out here at work............
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  #106  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:37 PM
Goldenmom Goldenmom is offline
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Heidi, every dog is different. Some will be having so much fun where they are, that they will forget. Damien is still a pup, so therefore, I think that he will be just fine adjusting to a new environment. We just had a 12-yr old foster lab here and this guy would adjust to anywhere, as long as he was loved and cared for.

Don't worry about Damien, he will do just fine throughout this.

Heather
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  #107  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:39 PM
Goldenmom Goldenmom is offline
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Quote:
Originally Posted by heidiho
I think i am gonna breakdown,it is taking everything i have got,not to start losing it,and have all the tears pour out here at work............

Heidi, this is all normal. You will feel like this for some time. Keep yourself busy. Go to the Humane Society this weekend and find a cat or older kitten. I agree that when I saw the pictures of Damien running with all the other dogs... well, this is what being a dog is all about and who wouldn't want that!

Heather
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  #108  
Old June 25th, 2004, 03:49 PM
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I also feel like i am betraying him,like that is his apt. to, iknow that sounds crazy,but that is how i feel.I will be at shelters all weekend,looking,my friends daughter is gonna stay the night with me tomorrow,so i will take her to go look at kittens,she is 10 so she will like that,i am also not gonna bring him home tonight,i dont think i can deal with it,he is gonna stay with my friend tonight i will take him in the morning to the shelter,the longer i am with him the harder it will be to let him go...............
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  #109  
Old June 25th, 2004, 04:03 PM
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Heidi I am SO PROUD of you. I know this is so hard but you are doing the right thing. Just hang in there. Cats for the most part pick up really fast on the liter thing. Are you wanting a kitten or and older cat. If you get an older cat most of the time they are liter trainned already! That will help you out. This is hard but it will get better. You have been a good mommie and this just proves that even more! Good luck on finding your baby at the shelther. You will not regret it cats are wonderful friends and they are great cuddlers.
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  #110  
Old June 25th, 2004, 04:06 PM
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Thanks,i dont feel like a good mom right now,i leave here in about 20 minutes gonna go to a shelter over here and look..Cant bring myslef to pick damien up and bring him home tonight.because if i see the slightest change in him,i will think hey i dont need to give him up.........
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  #111  
Old June 25th, 2004, 04:11 PM
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Well i am off,thanks for the support,this will be this worst weekend ever...I will let you know monday all the stuff that happens....uhhhh!!! I am dying inside............Have a good weekend..
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  #112  
Old June 25th, 2004, 04:17 PM
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Hey I just looked on www.petfinder.com under Phoenix, Arizona and they have some very pretty cats take a look! Good luck!
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  #113  
Old June 25th, 2004, 04:39 PM
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Luba Luba is offline
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Heidi you are not dying inside now stop that nonsense!

(kidding ,...was trying to provoke you haha)

You won't feel so bad if you keep reinforcing in your mind that he's going to be fine

If you're more worried about you...well thats another issue. You aren't betraying him at all....those people that want to get rid of their 15 year old dog cause it peed on the carpet are betraying their dog.

YOU aren't!
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  #114  
Old June 25th, 2004, 06:38 PM
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I get home from work, log on and....wow!

Heidi, do the right thing for Damien. I know you and I did not get along in the beginning, I said some hurtful things and so did you. I am sorry for my part. We have been able to converse on a few occasions through pm's.
You have been through some very tough times and it seems Damien is your only joy. Sometimes you do have to let go.
Sometimes a certain pet and household is not the perfect combination.
Just one of my opinions; You and Damien are 'butting heads', competing against each other more than working with each other. This is a very crucial stage in his social behavior and learning process. If you can't control him now you will miss this window. He will become a liabilty. The outcome will be his demise for starters and if could seriously do harm or kill a child or adult. And you will lose everything you own and your life will never be the same. You will also have to bear the guilt for the rest of your life. I know this is the worst case scenerio but it can happen in a heartbeat.
You and Damien are oil & water. His only chance is a new home. Heidi, in no way am I saying you are unfit. I'm only saying this is not a owner/pet match.


*stepping off the soap box*
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  #115  
Old June 25th, 2004, 08:16 PM
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i just dont understand, and you havent said why he was at the emergency??
i dont think you should get a cat yet, get your stuff together before getting a cat. perhaps you can look into cats as a pet and be a little more prepared this time. just give damien up, it is hard for him to be shuttled around all the time, because you cant make up your mind, make a decision and stick to it. perhaps you should get budgie or a pot plant, they can be loving as well and are far less maintance.
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  #116  
Old June 25th, 2004, 09:28 PM
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trescanis trescanis is offline
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No animals yet!

This is BY NO MEANS sarcasm, but I think Melanie has a fantastic idea. A potted plant.

If someone cannot afford money for training a dog, how in the heck can the same person afford the money for maintaining a cat?

Why not volunteer at a shelter and hug away? That I think would be the most unselfish thing you could do.
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  #117  
Old June 25th, 2004, 09:37 PM
Lucky Rescue Lucky Rescue is offline
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I agree Trescanis. Any pet can end up costing a lot of money. I had a rat who cost 315$
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  #118  
Old June 25th, 2004, 10:55 PM
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Luba Luba is offline
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If I'm not mistaken the type of training that Heidi indicated was going to be quite expensive.

Is it fair to say because she can't afford to spend several hundred or a thousand dollars on training for Damien that she can't get a cat? I don't think thats fair.

The issue isn't about money solely with Heidi .... as someone else said it's just not working out. That happens! She may be in over her head with this dog, so she hopefully will have him rehomed.

HEY she can always become a foster mommie to cats!! I'm sure rescues are looking all over for foster homes! hint hint Heidi!
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  #119  
Old June 25th, 2004, 11:52 PM
Lucky Rescue Lucky Rescue is offline
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Cats can be very expensive too. I know all about it I always said for what my last cat (20 yr old Monstrose) cost me, I could have gotten a racehorse!!

I think if heidi wants a cat, she should wait and read up on them and learn about them first. If she still wants one, I suggest a declawed adult for her.
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  #120  
Old June 26th, 2004, 08:35 AM
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I actually sympathize with Heidi,like I would be,she was ill prepared for a puppy,but could not easily give up on him.
However,I am not comfortable with the casual way some of you say"you can always get a cat/kitten".
Cats too cost money,cats too get sick and need a lot of love and care,they do live a lot longer than most dogs.
Heidi having a nasty boyfriend bothers me,if he is teasing a puppy,I can just imagine what he would do to a small cat
Also,unlike a puppy,cats should not be kept in crates.Also not all kitties are instantly lap-cats,especially shelter-kitties,it will take some effort and patience to gain a cats confidence,well worth it,but does Heidi have it?
I don't begrudge Heidi someone to love and care for,I just want her to think about it,before replacing Damien with a cat...also,in my experience a male cat would be better in the cuddle-department
One last thing,I am hoping Heidi is not thinking of locking a cat up in the bathroom while she is at work,she will then have a very stressed cat,unlikely to be a lap-cat.
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