Explain HAM to me PLEASE!!

[raingirl]

I like ham, but the ham I have had at other people's houses never taste like the ham I buy.

I usually buy those smoked ham balls that are rather compact and ok for slicing and cubing. I see those "pickled picnic shoulders" but I'm afraid to buy them because I don't like things pickled. The ham I usually have at other peoples houses is looser more like a roast, but still obviously cured/smoked, but nice and almost flakey in some areas.

And I know you can buy ham with a bone and put it in the slow cooker with split peas to make a soup. What kinds of ham is that?