Hi Janet
Your cat will need antibiotics ASAP for his infection and may be a good idea to see a vet. I had a similar situation this winter with a cat I found and the first round of antibiotics didn't help because the infection was further up the toe than the vet first thought!
Here is a suggestion to get him in a carrier - When cats are frightened, they like to hide. While holding the cat and cuddling him (if he allows this), just cover his eyes with your hand or allow the cat to put his face under your arm. This may help calm him down a little. Or what about trying to put a blanket or towel on him and then put him in a carrier? If he's really difficult try using a bigger carrier that is easier getting him into it!
Most cats are terrified of car rides but they can really bluff too!