One of the best exercises for general self control is a stay or leave-it.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Vk4PPcE1CqY
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zNAOe1djDyc
As tenderfoot says start slow and build difficult over time.
There is a protocol for de-sensitizeing dogs to stimulus they are becoming reactive to called BAT that you can practice.
http://ahimsadogtraining.com/blog/bat/
http://ahimsadogtraining.com/blog/20...g-bat-cartoon/
It is something you can practice with dogs behind fences but it is better if you can work with a friend or (even better) qualified trainer and a decoy dog.
As a side note, the best treatment (or part of the treatment plan) for a dog with poor self control is often exercise. How much off leash or high intensity exercise does your dog get? How much mental stimulation?
Tenderfoot: I heartily agree with most of what you have written except for this
"When he sighs, he accepting what you are asking. If he lays down he is accepting it at a deeper level. When he kicks his hips off to one side he is accepting it at an even deeper level."
Some of these are calming signals which correspond to elevated levels of stress hormones in a dog. They are a way for your dog calm themselves or to ask you to calm down because you are making them nervous or upset.