Hi Hazelrun, I gave Shrek your kisses.
We had such a great Saturday with Shrek, we took him to a park with a few trails, where he explored and we followed.
Then we got the dogs some marrow bones and they chewed them in the yard for a few hours and enjoyed the warm weather.
He was starting to look a little less steady than usual, and we noticed his breathing getting worse. He didn't want his kibble, or biscuits, so we gave him porridge -which he liked. Saturday night was a rough night for him as he seemed to have alot of trouble breathing. We weren't sure he would last the night, as soon as he'd get into a deep sleep, he'd breathe in, then it was like his body wanted to breathe out through his nose but couldn't, so he just stopped breathing for a few seconds. We were trying to keep him comfortable, and didn't really get any sleep. For the first time, we noticed the nerve twitch which told us the tumor was starting to cause nerve damage.
Sunday morning, Shrek was not responsive, he was so tired and didn't want to get up. :sad: We said good morning (which usually made him jump up and wag his tail), and coaxed him and called him but he just kept sleeping. He got up when he sneezed and then he had a small nose bleed. He stopped wanting to go downstairs without help, he seemed unsure of his footing. He went outside, and ate porridge and tripe for breakfast. Then, he went back to looking really tired and introverted, and had started sneezes with a head shake. The twitch showed up again a few times. He perked up when I brought out a marrow bone for him to chew; it seemed to distract him.
He rested quite peacefully. Then we took him for a walk, and he walked like an old dog, a little unsteady, and was weaving a bit. But then he perked up a little and made us laugh by walking into the kitchen and licking the end of a homemade loaf of bread my Mom had just made.
So him and Mojo got to share that piece.
That night, he got a several course meal: cold milk (the vet recommended it to soothe his palate); cold homemade ham soup; then steak/porridge/& natural yoghurt...he seemed to really enjoy that...then he wanted a second helping of the porridge/yoghurt.
As recommended, we gave him a double dose of Metacam. We put the humidity up to 50%, as the vet had suggested, to help his breathing. I think that helped, and he had a better night. But he had stopped wanting to go downstairs. :sad: And he didn't want to go upstairs, I prepared to sleep in the living room with him where he seemed to want to be for a few hours. Then, I went upstairs for a minute, and to my surprise he followed me. It was so nice to have him on the bed one more night.
This morning, he did get up with us, but he still looked tired. The twitch showed up again once or twice a little worse than Sunday. :sad: And he was sneezing while shaking his head. He started pawing his face like the tumor was annoying him. He didn't want to go downstairs, and my husband had to carry him. :sad: Then, so he wouldn't have to do stairs, I took him out the front door and round to the back gate, and he trotted down to the back yard and acted like there was nothing wrong, he even went for a little run. We had made an apointment to take him to the vet at 9am. I gave him a porridge/ham soup/tripe/steak breakfast -which he really seemed to like.
Then he slept again. He still looked more frail, tired, and uncomfortable...but it was so hard when he ran to the car wagging his tail. :sad: We took our other dog Mojo with us, so the family could be together and she wouldn't wonder why he hadn't come home. We brought his comforter, and got him all comfy, gave the dogs some homemade bread as a treat and enjoyed some extra time together. And after a bit of time holding him and trying to talk about good things -so we wouldn't upset him, the vet gave him the assistance to pass-over. He was so brave, and slipped away in my arms so quickly, and peacefully, with Mojo and my husband close-by. The vet told us that it was so fast, he was likely very weak and ready. Even though I didn't want to be selfish and keep him around till the last moment for my benefit and I didn't want to let him suffer; and I knew he was just going to steadily get worse, it was still so hard to let him go.
The rest of the day has been really rough, we tried to do a few things to distract us, but I know it will be a long time before it doesn't hurt so badly. :sad:
He had lots and lots of kisses and hugs, the last few days -and since we were lucky enough to adopt him. He's packed alot into 5 short years; he's been to daycare, travelled accross the country, and been my shadow...and I hope he is in a warm happy place with no pain.
Thanks Hazelrun and friends for all your kind words and support.