Thank you both for the responses. I realize that there aren't any definite answers or quick solutions to my problem but I guess I just needed some ideas of what I should and shouldn't do. Like I said before, this is my first time as a cat owner and I'm still really getting a feel for it. I had a dog for 14 years and there is a huge difference in the behaviors, training, and relationship, as I'm sure you all know.
Longblades, thanks for the comment back. To answer your questions, nothing has changed in my routine that I can think of and when my husband is home Tobias is still indifferent toward me.
Ownedbycats, I should clarify that Tobias was not in the window sill when I put the harness there, he was on the floor, next to me. You do raise a good point though. In the past couple of weeks a few cats have been wandering into our backyard and passing the windows on the way (we live in a basement apartment). Before this, Tobias used to only spend a little bit of time looking out our windows but since seeing these stray cats he's been up there a lot more, almost like he's waiting for them. Is it possible he's angry that I put something in "his territory"?
Thank you for the responses. They really mean a lot to me! Tobias is still pretty cold with me today but I did manage to get him interested in playing with his toys with me, I guess that is some tiny progress. He still won't let me pet him though but I'll have to give that some time and go slow.