Thank you both so much for your replies! Althe, your Pisica sounds like a brave little kitty. I loved the photos you posted on your other post about her brother mourning her.
Kitty and I had some good news (well, what passes for good news nowadays) today at our meeting with the oncologist. I was so much more hopeful after this visit. She said that she absolutely would get the surgery done if Kitty were her cat. She said the risks of the surgery are outweighed by the benefits. She said she would also recommend taking out the spleen while they are in there because this cancer is commonly starts in the spleen and moves to the intestine and Kitty doesn't need her spleen, so may as well take it out and not risk it. They will also take small biopsies of other organs and lymph nodes to make sure it has not spread (although she does not expect to see that it has spread).
What sold me on the surgery is that the oncologist said that if the tumor was not removed, the chemicals and histamines that it releases would cause ulcers to form in Kitty's intestine and the ulcers would eat through her intestine and cause a bowel leak. She said the poor prognosis of 2-5 months associated with this cancer is due to the fact that a lot of cats get diagnosed when these ulcers start causing them problems and there is not much to be done then.
If the surgery is a success, she recommended the once per week chemo for 4-6 weeks and then Kitty could take the chemo pill once every 4-6 weeks. She was hopeful that Kitty would not have to be sedated for the chemo because it is a fairly quick injection.
She said if things go well, Kitty could live another 12-18 months and have a good quality of life.
Kitty is scheduled for surgery tomorrow. It will not be the first surgeon I spoke to doing the surgery. I opted to have someone in the office with the oncologist do it. This surgeon lists "tumor removal" as one of her areas of special interest (the other surgeon had orthopedics listed). I will post an update after the surgery.
I felt so hopeless yesterday after the meeting with the surgeon, that I started to cancel today's appointment. It is still not sunshine and rainbows, but I feel a sense of hope now.
I'm so thankful that we found this in time to give Kitty a chance. I am so, so thankful that I took Kitty to the vet for that vomiting issue and so thankful that he squeezed around on her good and found that lump. I go to a very low-tech, old school vet near retirement age. Sometimes I get concerned that he doesn't have all the fancy equipment that the newer vets have but he always give my cats good care and doesn't try to oversell us on stuff. I will never doubt him again.
Now I just have to see if I can get Kitty in the carrier for the third day in a row tomorrow morning!