I'm so sorry. We had something similar with Sookie. She had to be put down and we were expecting to have her body back. Due to the language barrier in Germany, they were mistaken about what we wanted and found out that where we lived, we could not bury her. To get her ashes back we would have had to pay quite a bit and we just didn't have the money right then. I understand the lack of closure. Some people just need it.
How are you doing and what came of the situation? Either way I hope you have some peace back.