heidi I hope you get a place that has a flame tree near by. OMG!! those are my FAVORITE tropical trees when they bloom and it would be quite a sight waking up to :cloud9:

Ok can you post a picture of one,dont know if i have seen one or not,so many different trees here

jiorji you crack me up! Flame trees are cool.

Heidiho, sorry, I may have missed this in other posts, but who broke up with whom in their past relationship? At least in my experience, I have to say, I have zero desire for anyone I have broken up with in the past, but can't say the same about those who have broken up with me. For a long time, I usually hope they will change their minds... That is just me though.

Also, I totally agree, he is not spending time working on things with you and instead is talking to her. His is putting his energy in the wrong place if he hopes things will work out with you. Problems don't get solved by not dealing with them! It is kind of wimpy and not a good way to go about solving problems, but not an uncommon way for people to deal with things, I suppose. It's not the easy path, to meet things head on. Counseling sounds like it could be worthwhile, though you seem to be more than ready to move on. I hope you get a good place for you and Roxy! Roommates can be ok, at least in a temporary situation until you can get in a better financial position.

[QUOTE=heidiho;419684]Ok can you post a picture of one,dont know if i have seen one or not,so many different trees here[/QUOTE]

[url]http://www.lanerealty.com.au/picFlameTree.html[/url]

He ended it 14 years ago,the short story on that is i just started using meth and was getting pretty messed up on it,so he really just wanted nothing to do with that,his art career with no fear and lifes a beach was just taking off,so i understood that.,but something about him just always styed w/ me i would fly there or he would fly to az and we woudl just have the best best times together and there never was another guy like that after.But it seems he stil lacts like he is 37 not 47 ,and by no means am i perfect,but i want to work on that to,and i need to do it alone,well w/ roxy by my side.

Heidi, I wish you all the best in this situation. You have to trust your instincts I think. I wouldn't be thrilled with phone calls to the ex under any circumstances, but when they're happening while you're arguing I would call that being unfaithful--emotionally at least.

I think the best thing is to keep your cool, wish him well and hope that you can remain friends. And then enjoy findin gthe person who deserves you and will give you all those carats YOU deserve.

Just from the little bit I know of you on the boards I can tell that you are strong--overcoming your addictions, and sweet the way you care for Roxy and the other kitties too. And you've been appreciative of Mark and bragged on his talent even when you know he isn't perfect--you still give him the benefit of the doubt.

I hope that the apartment issue works out better than you even hoped and that you find a guy who is strong and smart and handsome and fun and, what the heck--let's make him be rich too !!:goodvibes: :goodvibes:

Joeysmama- You said it well, i dont think he thinks i will do this,he will be wrong,i just ordered and got this book called "Change your mind and your life will follow" it is perfect and i love reading it,anyone gets a chance it is a gid read,unless you do lead a perfect existence ,then you dont need to read it.Well i am off will let you know about studio i am going to look at.And oh yeah-RICH would really be great.Why not me,you know,and hell in Maui there is plenty of it..

[QUOTE=rainbow;419689][url]http://www.lanerealty.com.au/picFlameTree.html[/url][/QUOTE]

no that's not it

THIS tree:cloud9:
[url]http://www.flickr.com/photos/hojucandy/310255993/[/url]
[url]http://www.flickr.com/photos/dinesh_valke/437668677/[/url]

Heidi I found your future home :lovestruck: :D
[url]http://www.flickr.com/photos/mlpa/173413393/[/url]

I love it,how perfect that would be,but damn i already bought this one.

and your all welcome

I can see it f german shepherds,5 cats and a hot husband and one son.Perfect dream

Do people really live like that!!!!!!!

well if i put 2,000,000 down at 5.6 % for 40 years my payment will only be 39,000 a month,.

ooohhhh those are niiiiiiiiiiiiiiice:cloud9:

That probably is the nicest house i have ever seen,and it is like a mile from where i live now..

Told you he wouldnt think i was serious,he comes home last night like at 11:00 after drinking w/boss.So this morning he mentions well you know (going to the bedroom) i am like are u kidding i am so far from that,and then i said something about getting my own place and he said "Well who knows you might just be living here"and i said mark i thought you might not think i was serious but i am ,what does he think he can just go drink every night and i am not gonna get more and more turned off.......God men can be dumb.......

That house looks fake it is so elaborate!! If the owner is a single guy, I am willing to settle for being his second wife :laughing:

Maybe you should leave one night while he is out drinking... just kidding, probably not a good idea. It would have more impact if he is sober anyway.

Heidi,there is one thing that is an absolute turn-off to me,something I could not live with and that's a drunk and unless Mark stops,there is no future with him.IMO
Never,ever argue with a drunken man,it could get violent,but I am sure you know that by now..
You are a beautiful young lady,the future is yours..once Mark realizes you are really leaving,you are brave enough to go out on your own,I am sure he'll be pleading and promising change,until the beer takes over again..:yell:

So i got a call back from someone about apt and she said nooo we dont accept pets,but if you want to go ahead and get rid of your pet the rent is blah blah i deleted message when i heard her say that so nonchanonlty(cant spell it)i found one i really really want it is 925.00 plus 50.00 a month for roxy,but then i look up at sign in there office and it says declawed only,so i talk to manager and tell him it is to cruel i wont do it,but i do trim her nails every 2 weeks and she only scratches on her condo (lie) so i convinced him to let us live there claws and all.It will be at least 2 months though cause deposit it what the rent is,975.00..Any ideas on how to keep a cat from scrathcing carpet or a patio screen,cause i actually think she might if we lived there,

that sounds wonderful Heidi!
as for scratching prevention, catnip!! lol i put it on Rolands scratch post and thats where he scratches, and rolls and purrs and goes a little crazy.
man, i need to find me one of those Maui bachelor boys with a house like that! holy cow! seriously. i would love to live there!

[QUOTE=heidiho;421637]Any ideas on how to keep a cat from scrathcing carpet or a patio screen,cause i actually think she might if we lived there,[/QUOTE]

Cayenne pepper powder, they hate it.

Roxy knows not to scratch on couch,cause when i see her do it,she takes off,she does good w/scratching on condo ,and cardboard thing we have nailed to wall,also has NO interest in catnip at all.I just know when she sees a nice screen door,it is a sliding glass door,which we dont have in our place,she is gonna want to scratch it,and also we dont have carpet so i think she is also gonna like that,i guess worse comes to worse i have to pay something if i ever move out.And by they way it really can be done living here,i might have to get 1 more job three nights a week,cause it will be super tight making it on my own,but there aew no shortage of jobs here,like The Four Seasons is hiring at 17.00 a n hour front desk,they are jsut to far for me to drive,but the hotels here pay ok.

good news heidi!!

you know my cat didn't know about catnip either(she was a stray kitten too) until the second cat came along and showed her what to do with the catnip.

If you keep the nails trimmed they won't do damage if they scratch. I guess the apartment will come furnished? You can also try training her and squirt her with water everytime she attempts to scratch something.

good luck. Keep us posted how things go...I suspect things won't go easy when you finally walk out on Mark :sad:
:fingerscr for an easy move

I will remember the cayenne,oh how i wish i could move now,it is weird living there knowing that it is really over,but it will be at least a month before i can get deposit together,so i am thinking aug 1 is when i can move.

i have to say that i dont agree with using Cayenne. you know that stuff burns if it gets in your eyes, imagine how it would burn their eyes too. and its spicy! maybe try some orange essence on the screen or something like that. harmless and they hate the smell.

OMG How could i forget this,i listened to his messages last night and she left one sunday afternoon i could barley understand her,but i did catch,"hey mark i have had a couple of shots,i love you,i hope you find somebody"that was all i got.When i asked him the day before that maybe someday they can get back together he said no way she is a mess.So what do you think of that????Is he innocent or no?

wow. that almost sounds as if she wanted something and he said no.

That's good news Heidiho, :highfive: if Roxy scratches your patio screen, they are easy to replace , you can do it yourself. The carpet....little more expensive to replace but if she is used to do it on her condo , you shouln't have too much problems.

Sounds like that to me to,she had a drinking and coke problem,(he knows how to pick em eh!!) meaning me to...But my thing is like i know he is not gonna tell me that she left that message and i know i should not be listening to them,but wouldnt that bother anyone here,hearing a message like that and your man not telling you??