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I am totally devastated!!

November 3rd, 2004, 01:58 PM
This past Saturday I was running around doing a million things, and my youngest kitty crawled into the clothes dryer while i was emptying the lint trap (she would hide in the back.. LOVED the dryer and crawled in often).. and I started it and went out to see a baby (I'm a visiting nurse) when I got back and started to fold the clothes I found my beloved kitty (one year old only). She did not survive, as I hear they usually don't I totally freaked out and have cried off and on for days, This was the most horrible thing I have EVER experienced. I am a Pediatric Nurse who LOVES animals and I have had 3 cats and a dog for a while. Has this ever happened to anyone else here? I don't know how I can ever get over the huge amount of guilt and pain I feel over this.. I can't stop thinking about it and it is haunting me day and night... I feel SO TERRIBLE!! Kathie

November 3rd, 2004, 02:05 PM
Even though I have not been through such a traumatic experience, I can still sympathize at how you must feel. To lose a loved member of the family, at such a young age, under such tragic circumstances, is the worst thing that can happen to a pet lover.

It's in a cat's nature, as you're well aware, to seek out warm spots. I highly doubt there's anything you could have done to prevent this from happening. In time you'll think back on the fond memories of finding her all warm and content from having hid in such a good hiding spot. I know it's no consolation, but try to think that she passed doing what she loved to do.

I wish there was something else I could say, other than I'm sorry for your loss. Perhaps it would make you feel better if you were to talk to a therapist to help with your grief.

November 3rd, 2004, 02:10 PM
I feel terrible for you. Please please don't beat yourself up anymore. IT WAS AN ACCIDENT. Time will heal. In the meantime try some thought interuption and try to keep busy and with company because no matter how many times you go over it in your mind you can't change what happened. Accidents happen to the best of us.

Take care

November 3rd, 2004, 02:11 PM
OMG!! :sad: I have never experienced such a thing; all I can say is how very sorry I am for you! That's terrible! My Connor (when he was a kitten), we used to leave the stove door open when we were done cooking meals, just to warm the kitchen. He crawled inside the oven one day (it was relative cooled down) and door got closed on him. I heard him meowing and was able to get him out before the stove was turned on again. I don't leave it open anymore!

Bless you, I hope that things get better for you! It was an accident! I'll be thinking about you!

November 3rd, 2004, 02:14 PM
How tragic! I am sincerely sorry for your loss. :sad:

Don't blame yourself. You were going off to work as a help people, so obviously you are a good person and you made a mistake. Don't beat yourself up.


November 3rd, 2004, 02:22 PM
................Sorry for your loss.................. :sorry: :sorry: :sorry:

November 3rd, 2004, 02:24 PM
I send you my deepest condolences....this was a terrible accident.

It will get easier with time.

When you are ready, posting a tribute has proven to be truly cathartic for many people.

Again I cannot tell you how sorry I am for your loss.

I wish you hope and sunnier days.


November 3rd, 2004, 02:29 PM
I'm so sorry!!!! I know how you feel.....I had a kitten last summer. I got her from a farm and she was quite ill. I spent lots of $$$ to get her all better and she was going to be a beauty when she grew up. She would go outside every morning before I went to work. My fiance was leaving early and had asked me if the kitten was in the house. I said "Yep i beleive so." Well turned out I was wrong. My fiance backed the car up and felt a thud, the dogs went crazy. He ran into the house and told me he thinks he ran over the kitten because he saw something run. We looked and looked and found her hiding. I coaxed her out and checked her all over. She seemed fine but limped a little. I decided to skip work and go to the vet to have her checked for internal bleeding. I really thought she was going to be ok, but the xrays showed her diaphragm was crushed and her intestines were going up into her chest. They had to put her to sleep as she was too small to operate on. I was completely devastated. I still feel bad about it(I should have looked for sure). But I do treasure the short time I had with her.

Unfortunately accidents happen and there is nothing you can do about it. Don't beat yourself up ok? :o Animals are always curious and can get into all sorts of trouble. If it wasn't this, it could have been something else. Don't blame yourself, it's not your fault. Blame is all part of the greiving process. It will take time so don't be so hard on yourself. :love:

November 3rd, 2004, 02:52 PM
I am so sorry for you and I am sure you feel so guilty but it was an accident. I know it doesn't make it any easier but time is a great healer and anytime you feel like you need a shoulder to cry on we are all here. This board can be extremely supportive as I have learned. My thought are with you

heeler's rock!
November 3rd, 2004, 04:06 PM
I am so incredibly sorry for your loss! Cats are known for their curious nature and for gettng into trouble....It wasn't your fault because if you had known she was in there, you would have gotten her out. She knows you didn't do it on purpose and still loves you and is smiling down on you. The grief is immense right now, but we are all here for you to talk to......time will heal your heart, and your memories will last a lifetime. :love:

Dwight Byrd
November 3rd, 2004, 06:49 PM
You are feeling all of this pain, you are devestated, because you loved her. You loved her a lot. That is what is really important. Let yourself feel the pain. That's o.k., but don't blame yourself and don't beat yourself up. It was a very sad accident. You sound like a wonderful person who is just heartbroken over this tragedy. Focus on the good memories, and ... do something nice for yourself, something that will make you feel good. Do it for your kitty who is now in Rainbow Bridge, and do it for yourself. Take care.

November 3rd, 2004, 08:06 PM
I am so sorry about your loss.

November 3rd, 2004, 09:37 PM
It sounds like you really cared for this little creature, Kathie,which makes it all the harder to bear. It is the kind of thing one could never foresee. Perhaps the fact that you have shared this with us (and maybe with others too) may prevent a similar tragedy from happening to someone else. Only time will heal.

November 4th, 2004, 01:23 AM
oh you poor poor sweetie. how horrible! when i was a teen, our kitten did the same thing. we found her within 5 minutes and she ended up being alright but the guilt my mother felt for starting the dryer was horrible. thanks for sharing and bringing this up for people so that others can be aware of this danger.


November 5th, 2004, 07:10 AM
You guys are all so wonderful. Some people I've confided in and told this to, just don't seem to understand. One lady laughed a bit when i told her, then she saw the look on my face, and said, "Oh, Im sorry." and she is a nurse. Maybe she just didn't know how to react., anyway, I feel good to write to a group of fine people who love animals like I do, and who can understand my grief. thank You all SOOO much for your empathy and understanding. Life goes on,, and Most of all, I want to prevent this from happening to anyone else's kitty.. Love ya All! Kathie

jackie c
November 5th, 2004, 07:21 AM
I read what happened and I am soo sorry for your loss. While reading it my eyes teared over and can only imagine your grief. Remember it was an accident, you are not responsible. It is very clear to see that you loved your pet and hopefully talking with others will make you feel better in time. :sorry:

November 5th, 2004, 07:45 AM
:sorry: kathmerkin(((((((HUGS))))))))

I can only imagine the guilt you must feel, and I too would be haunted with imagery of this horrible accident!! But it was just that an ACCIDENT. Don't beat yourself up any longer. (Easier said then done I know) but time will heal and do as Marko said post a tribute for her in pet cemetary you'd be surprised at how good it makes you feel just giving her that last special personal touch when it is completed.

And dont worry about that ladies reaction.....she has no heart, how dare she laugh at the loss of a family member how heartless and rude :mad:

Your days will be brighter and you can look back at all the wonderful memories she gave you and the love you gave her :thumbs up

November 5th, 2004, 08:01 AM
We had a cat that would crawl into the dryer. The dryer we had was broken, and if you closed it, it would automatically turn on. So we had to leave it open all the time. Well our cat climbed in it once, and my sisters had just came in from our pool, so they put their pool towels in the dryer to get them dry for next time. Luckily there were only 3 towels otherwise we wouldn't have heard the thud, and he would have went around more than a few times. After that, we always checked the dryer for him. and 90% of the time he was in there. There is nothing that you could have done to prevent it. All you can do now is check the dryer before you turn it on, just to make sure one of your other cats haven't tried the same thing. I know how you must feel. It is a real tragic thing to happen to such a young kitty. I hope that time heals your pain. And keep looking forward to the brighter days, they will come.

November 6th, 2004, 11:40 AM
I'm just trying to catch up on the week's posts, so I just saw this one. My heart really goes out to you. It was an unfortunate accident, but an accident. Grief and guilt together are both so hard to bear. Try to let go of the guilt - you didn't know - it was an accident! Take one day at a time and concentrate on the good memories!

November 7th, 2004, 07:31 AM
I really have nothing to add,other than I can imagine the horror you must have felt.....I am truly sorry for you :sorry: