December 23rd, 2012, 11:03 AM
A friend on another forum told me that in order to fully grieve over my lost cat, I should adopt another baby. Not to replace the kitty we lost but just to give me something to do to keep my mind off him. Do you feel that this is a good idea? I have other pets in the house so I am not completely alone, and I have my husband as well. What do you think?
December 24th, 2012, 08:38 PM
Adopting another pet is a very personal choice and different for everyone. Here are some questions that might help you think it through and come to a decision that is right for you:
Do you have time/room/money for another pet?
Would you want an older pet or a younger one?
How would the pets you already have react to a new animal that doesn't come jsut for a visit, but stays permanently?
What do the other members of the family think of getting another pet?
Whatever you choose, I hope you soon stop feeling sad about not having you pet with you, but can remember all the good things about having them around.
December 25th, 2012, 10:51 AM
Personally I feel that grieving is good and that you should take the time "to let it all out". I think getting another pet too soon might mask that grieving.
Everyone is different but I would wait a bit longer ..... just my opinion though - these things are so personal.
December 26th, 2012, 08:33 PM
I just feel that getting another one would feel like we wanted to replace the kitty we lost and I would never intend to do that. I am thinking that we will wait for a while and then maybe talk about it.
January 16th, 2013, 02:23 PM
Short Answer: I would wait before getting a another pet. Remember the good times with the pet that has passed on and love the ones you still have. Grieving takes time.
Long Answer: In 2012 we had to euthanize both our pet cats. It's been an incredibly hard year for me emotionally as they got ill in entirely different ways. One was quite young(3) and the other old(14).
On New Year's Eve I had my 14 year old cat euthanized after a long illness(5 months), there was nothing more I could do for him and he was suffering and I was suffering watching him suffer. I cried at least weekly over him during the time he was ill because I knew it was just a matter of time before I would have to make that final vet appointment. The whole situation was heartbreaking for everyone in my family of 5. We all miss him a great deal.
I also have two dogs so we're not pet-less but we don't plan on getting new cats until the fall(Oct/Nov) and then we will get young cats so they can adjust to the dogs more easily.
The last time we lost a pet, when we were a one dog & one cat family we waited a year before we got a new dog. It felt better to grieve for our missing pet and gave us time to heal before getting another pet. We are only waiting a little less time than that this time because I really really miss having a cat in the house and in our house November is birthday month as myself and my two daughters all have birthdays that month. The two new kittens will be a joint birthday gift to the three of us. Although I will be the one taking care of them - of course.
I feel waiting is better and shows respect for the feelings you have for the pet that has passed. Give yourself some time and space to remember and heal so that if you decide to get another pet you can love them for them and not as a replacement for the lost pet.
January 17th, 2013, 09:45 AM
I'm sorry for your loss of your cat.
I don't agree with your friend. That makes a new little kitten a tool instead of a wanted and loved pet. You could take up knitting just as easily to get your mind off your grieving. I agree with those who say you need to grieve, I'd let the process go on however long you feel sad. Everybody is different
January 17th, 2013, 12:28 PM
I also agree with other it would be fair for the kitten to wait awhile longer. The kitten will have it own unique personality and if you are grieving your lost cat you may wish your kitten was more like your cat. I would give yourself more time so when you get a new kitten you'll be able to love it for his or her personality. I wish I waited a liitle longer as when I got Marty, I kept thinking he nothing like my last dog and of course that was not fair for
Marty. Now I love Marty for who he is .