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Ahhh, the guilt!!!

September 5th, 2004, 07:35 PM
This morning I had to take Casey out 6 times -- everytime he just circled around, sniffing as if he wanted to take a BM, but then got distracted, tried to eat something off the sidewalk, etc., and I'd get frustrated and come back in, and work at getting breakfast ready for hubby before work... and the last time I was so frustrated I snatched him up and marched up the stairs holding him way too tightly and even gave his bottom a little smack, and now I feel soooo guilty! I know that he couldn't possibly understand why I was upset with him, and that my actions were not only not helpful, but harmful to our relationship! Is there any damage control I can do now, or just be sure never to show my frustration in such an unhelpful way again? I need help! Also, any suggestions on how to calm my frustration on a crazy morning when my silly poochie has my running up and down 3 flights of stairs multiple times? I don't have the option of fencing in a yard here, so what I need is more patience, which I really do have when it isn't a busy morning! Help!!! Thank you!!!

September 5th, 2004, 07:49 PM
Tamara we all get frustrated from time to time and anyone who thinks we don't LIE!!

Let me tell you a little story.

It was Christmas me and my then common law had a huge argument but were expected still at my parents place for dinner.

I managed to still bake some cookies and make some pies to give to my family. Half crying and arguing with the dork I didn't want to go but you know, had to ....and so getting ready I was frustrated.

It wasn't too bad but because of my frustration I wasn't thinking right.

I put all the baked goods in the back seat of the car with my then westie terrier x Rusty. (my avatar)

Well, half way to mom and dads house goofball starts arguing AGAIN. At a red light he gets outta the car and starts to walk away. If I had any brains I'd have just let him do it but no thought I better go get the cry baby. So I do.

When we come back to the car Rusty had promptly eaten and entire lemon cheesecake pie, graham crust and all.

I yelled at him a little but didnt' think to take the rest into the front seat because I was driving and heaven forbid the dork would do something useful and actually hold them.

So, on the rest of the drive, Rusty stumbles to the floor at a red light and his paws go into another pie.

You can imagine my frustration when he decides to then start eating it there and then even more when we finally arrive at mom and dads.

Keep in mind meanwhile the dork is still yelling at me.

When we pull up to my folks house I was so mad I smacked Rusty not once or twice but maybe 4/5 times on his butt. Yup I admit I did it! I was crying and yelling at him at the same time, my mom comes to the car upset to see what I had done. I was upset at myself. I don't think I hit him really hard but I can't remember, mom said it wasn't too bad.

I stopped myself saw what I was doing and broke down, but he was afraid of me now :( I picked him up and started to tell him how sorry I was, crying and holding him walking up to the house wanting to really have hit the jerk who deserved it, not Rusty.

How tempting, for a dog..pies in the back seat!!

I was very young about 21 years old but it's no excuse for what I was horrible.

I forgave myself and Rusty passed away about a year and half ago and I still talk to him and tell him how sorry I am.

You have to forgive yourself but also promise yourself it won't happen again. Just remember how awful you feel this time.

((hugs)) you're only human!

September 5th, 2004, 08:10 PM
Thanks Luba -- glad to know I'm not alone. Poor Casey and Rusty, but poor 21-year old Luba too -- what a terrible terrible experience for you. I know how much things suck when in a bad relationship as I've been there too. What a bad day that was, eh? I'm glad you call that boyfriend your EX, and I hope your current (of future if you're currently unentangled ;) ) boyfriend is 100 times better than that guy!

You're right -- I just CAN'T let it happen again! I'm happy to say that Casey is currently curled on my lap, sleeping quite peacefully as if he's in the most comfortable place in the world, which is exactly how I want him to feel. Thank God dogs are so forgiving! Also, my poor sweetie pie is teething, I've just realized, so he deserves my babying more now than ever! I wonder if that could be part of the reason he was so strange this morning? Poor Casey!

Thanks again, Luba! hugs to you too!

September 5th, 2004, 08:52 PM
Moonie, dogs have their bad days too. His schedule has probably been a bit erratic lately with all the extra company. Don't worry. Like you say, they are so forgiving. All you can do is learn from it and it'll probably make you more patient in the future. Everybody has experienced some moment that they later regret. We're human after all. Bet moms with human kids can relate also. Yeah Luba! Glad you gave him the heave-ho and kept Rusty! :D

September 5th, 2004, 09:03 PM
YUP Rusty was much better looking too :D LMFHO!!!

Ice cubes work great for teething, esp if they are made from chicken stock frozen or something. :D I was just looking at Sadies baby teeth today while I was cleaning up a cupboard.

Cactus Flower
September 6th, 2004, 03:05 AM
What guts it took to post your confession (and you, too, Luba!). You have my respect for that!

I echo what has already been said. They are so forgiving, you are only human, NOBODY is the perfect pet-owner at all times every day. Casey has forgiven you and you need to forgive yourself.

I, too, think that things will settle down with your baby, in time. Maybe he is reacting to your own stress level right now? They are very perceptive!

September 6th, 2004, 04:46 AM
Ahh, you guys are so wonderful. Casey seems to be fine -- no fear of me or anything like that, his same adoring old self. I know I won't be doing that again as it accomplished nothing and caused pain all around (emotional pain that is -- I didn't smack him hard enough to cause real physical pain I certainly hope!) Just to add a little light to this thread -- the next time he scratched at the door and I took him out, he made the most perfect beautifully formed turd of his whole puppy life. I had to stop myself from applauding, it was that perfect :p

September 6th, 2004, 08:20 AM
Moontamara,welcome to the human race :D
I smacked Rockys skinny little butt once when he sprayed in the livingroom,but never again....he however loved the hugs and cuddles,sloppy kisses he got after my unreasonable outburst :D
Luba,I know you did not think so at the time,but your story was funny,especially the "dork"part :D

September 6th, 2004, 10:51 AM
Anita I know it was funny :D for sure!!! I really wanted to use some four letter words that replace dork but dork is what he was!

most perfect beautifully formed turd of his whole puppy life
ONLY a true loving caring doggie mama would say something like that.

I think the first time I saw Sadie do it I TOOK A PICTURE and jumped up and down like an idiot in the backyard!!

September 6th, 2004, 02:19 PM
I was just getting ready to ask . . . . where's the picture??! :D

September 6th, 2004, 02:25 PM
(laughing at myself) When I first read the title of your post, I thought it said "Ahhh, the quilt!" and I thought "Oh, no! Don't tell me he ate a wedding present!!". :D

I think we all have those little "lost control for a second" stories. I agree with Luba - we've all been there, and anyone who says differently is lying! ;)

September 6th, 2004, 03:36 PM
To Casey, from Den-Den,

September 6th, 2004, 07:07 PM
Hahaha!!! No picture!!! Do you guys want me to get divorced in the first month of marriage? (Just kidding -- after spending a lot more time getting to know Casey, my husband suddenly fell head over heels in love with him and probably would have liked to see his "accomplishment"!)

Glasslass, adorable poodle picture!

Casey's back on track with his dump schedule today and all is well! Thanks for all the support you lovely people!!!! By the way, I was shocked that you understood my pride in his perfect turd -- I thought I was the only freak who could appreciate or even notice something like that -- hey we're all freaks here!!!