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on the funnier side of life

Magicwildwolf69
April 4th, 2009, 01:38 AM
The other topic of kids running wild made me think of this poster i saw before. i tracked it down online and found a copy of it. hope everyone enjoys the humor!

Cheers!

Things our mother taught us

1.My mother taught me to appreciate a job well done.
“If you are going to kill each other do it outside. I just finished cleaning.”

2.My mother taught me religion
“You better pray that will come out of the carpet”

3.My mother taught me about time travel.
“If you don't straighten up. I'm going to knock you into the middle of next week.”

4.My mother taught me logic
“Because I said so thats why.”

5.My mother taught me more logic
“If you fall out of that swing and break your neck you're not going to the store with me.”

6.My mother taught me foresight
“Make sure you wear clean underwear in case you're in an accident.”

7.My mother taught me irony
“Keep crying and I'll give you something to cry about”

8.My mother taught me about the science of osmosis
“Shut your mouth and eat your supper”

9.My mother taught me about contortionism.
“Will you look at that dirt on the back of your neck.”

10.My mother taught me about stamina
“You'll sit there until all that spinach is gone.”

11.My mother taught me about weather.
“This room of yours looks as if a tornado went through it.”

12.My mother taught me about anticipation
“Just wait till we get home.”

13.My mother taught me about receiving
“You are going to get it when you get home.”

14.My mother taught me medical science
“If you don't stop crossing your eyes, they are going to stick that way

15.My mother taught me esp
“Put your sweater on; don't yo think i know when you are cold.”

16.My mother taught me humor.
“When that lawn mower cuts off your toes don't come running to me.”

17.My mother taught me how to become an adult
“If you don't eat your vegetables, you'll never grow up.”

18.My mother taught me genetics
“You're just like your father”

19.My mother taught me about my roots
“Shut that door behind you. Do you think you were born in a barn?”

20.My mother taught me wisdom
“When you get to be my age, you'll understand.”

21.And my favorite: My mother taught me about justice
“One day you'll have kids and i hope they turn out just like you!”

rainbow
April 4th, 2009, 01:58 AM
LOL, I definitely heard a few of those from my mom .....thanks for the laughs. :D

growler~GateKeeper
April 4th, 2009, 02:11 AM
:laughing: I've read a few of those before (heard a couple of them before too) :laughing:

Thanks for the laughs :D

CearaQC
April 4th, 2009, 04:58 AM
I think I heard every one on that list except for #18. :laughing:

hazelrunpack
April 4th, 2009, 07:18 PM
:laughing: Thanks for the laugh, MWW! :D

Magicwildwolf69
April 4th, 2009, 11:24 PM
i never really heard any expect number 6 hehe guess i'm not as well educated as all you ladies :)

Luvmypitgirls
April 7th, 2009, 10:44 AM
:laughing::laughing::laughing: