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Things Dogs Must Remember, But Don't!

Goldenmom
July 23rd, 2004, 09:28 AM
"Things Dogs Must Remember..."

I will not play tug-of-war with Dad's underwear when he's on the
toilet.
The garbage collector is NOT stealing our stuff.
I do not need to suddenly stand straight up when I'm lying under the
coffee table.
I will not roll my toys behind the fridge.
I must shake the rainwater out of my fur BEFORE entering the house.
I will not eat the cats' food, before or after they eat it.
I will stop trying to find the few remaining pieces of clean carpet in the
house when I am about to throw up.
I will not throw up in the car.
I will not roll on dead seagulls, fish, crabs, etc.
I will not lick my human's face after eating animal poop.
"Kitty box crunchies" are not food.
I will not eat any more socks and then redeposit them in the backyard
after processing.
The diaper pail is not a cookie jar.
I will not wake Mommy up by sticking my cold, wet nose up her bottom
end.
I will not chew my human's toothbrush and not tell them.
I will not chew crayons or pens, especially not the red ones, or my
people will think I am hemorrhaging.
When in the car, I will not insist on having the window rolled down
when
it's raining outside.
We do not have a doorbell. I will not bark each time I hear one on
TV.
I will not steal my Mom's underwear and dance all over the back yard
with it.
The sofa is not a face towel. Neither are Mom & Dad's laps.
My head does not belong in the refrigerator.

sammiec
July 23rd, 2004, 09:47 AM
LOL, that's very cute!!! :p Thanks for sharing!!! :D

Princesss04
July 23rd, 2004, 09:49 AM
Very funny! :D

wAggie
July 23rd, 2004, 11:15 AM
hshahahahhaa

ok, ok, i feel better knowing cHo don't do ALL of the above. .. :eek:

Catt31
July 23rd, 2004, 02:52 PM
LMFAO!!! OMG, I think Brick does a few of those too!!! Too funny!! :D

moontamara
July 23rd, 2004, 09:42 PM
I have to show this to my husband so he knows Casey's not the only one with memory lapses!!!!!!!!

glasslass
July 23rd, 2004, 10:33 PM
I just read these out loud to my hubby. He's still laughing! :p

Jeppyman
July 26th, 2004, 09:20 AM
If only my dogs could read :-)

Bill & Bob
July 26th, 2004, 10:33 AM
Bob was a positive hit on all of them, except for the ones that just don't apply like the kitty poop snacks and the diaper stuff. Very funny.