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Major Battle!

MissDorsie
April 29th, 2008, 11:40 PM
So the fight is on. I want to take Sapphire to a vet to get her parvo shots, but Ron wants me to let his sister-in-law do it. I'm all for saving money, but I told him that she can't guarantee the vaccination whereas my vet does.
Right after I got her I took her to my vet against his wishes and he got real upset cause it cost over $50.00 for the visit. I told him that it included a check-up, worm screening, her first vaccinations, and flea-tick treatment. I thought that was pretty reasonable and, not knowing about her source of origin, I wanted her checked over real good by a professional. Plus I'll have a record of her shots which I won't have if his sister-in-law gives them.
I feel stuck between a rock and a hard spot cause I really hate to go against his wishes. :cry: But on the other hand I want to do what's best for my baby! :confused:

growler~GateKeeper
April 30th, 2008, 01:12 AM
I take it your BF's SIL is not a vet then? :confused: so where would she be getting the parvo vaccine?

Tell him for something serious such as vaccines you are putting in your pups body especially for something as deadly as parvo you need to be assured as to the source/validity/viability (they do expire) of the vaccine :2cents:

luckypenny
April 30th, 2008, 01:30 AM
Parvo is a terrible disease that's swift and deadly. Please try to convince your partner that the 50$ in prevention is of much more value than the thousands $$ it costs to treat Parvo, without guarantees for success. It's certainly not something anyone would want to witness their pup suffering from either :sad: .

MissDorsie
April 30th, 2008, 05:38 AM
I take it your BF's SIL is not a vet then? :confused: so where would she be getting the parvo vaccine?

Tell him for something serious such as vaccines you are putting in your pups body especially for something as deadly as parvo you need to be assured as to the source/validity/viability (they do expire) of the vaccine :2cents:

The vaccine is readily for sale at vet and farm supply, and some pet stores. Anyone can purchase it. His SIL is not a vet but she gives all her animals the shots herself. I don't like it one bit.
As to to the validity, as I stated above, I told him that the vet guarantees the vaccine. If the pet gets parvo at anytime after recieving the shots, he will assume full responsibility.

MissDorsie
April 30th, 2008, 05:46 AM
Parvo is a terrible disease that's swift and deadly. Please try to convince your partner that the 50$ in prevention is of much more value than the thousands $$ it costs to treat Parvo, without guarantees for success. It's certainly not something anyone would want to witness their pup suffering from either :sad: .

The thing is (and I TOLD him) that the shots by themselves only cost around $25.00 at my vet. The $50.00 I shelled out was for a 1st time complete chack-up and Flea control treatment. Personally, I really can't understand why he's so adamant about the whole thing . His SIL lives 35 miles away and it would cost that much in gas just to drive all the way out there! I also pointed that out to him.

clm
April 30th, 2008, 06:03 AM
I wouldn't let anyone other than a vet administer shots to any animal of mine. Hubby could like it or lump it, but that's the way it would be in my house.

Cindy

danaekitty
April 30th, 2008, 07:15 AM
I wouldn't let anyone other than a vet administer shots to any animal of mine. Hubby could like it or lump it, but that's the way it would be in my house.

Cindy

I agree. Just do it and don't tell him. Maybe he'll forget about it. Men are dumb like that.

No offense, men on this board, as you have already proven yourselves smarter than my bf when it comes to animals, and now missdorsie's too!

MissDorsie
April 30th, 2008, 07:35 AM
I agree. Just do it and don't tell him. Maybe he'll forget about it. Men are dumb like that.

No offense, men on this board, as you have already proven yourselves smarter than my bf when it comes to animals, and now missdorsie's too!


ROFLMAO!! I went behind his back the first time, but when he inadvertantly
found out he started limiting the amount of money he gives me each week.
He has lots of common sense when it comes to big trucks but zip where Sapphire is concerned. It just doesn't make sense to me why he's being sooo stubborn about the whole thing.

athenamor
April 30th, 2008, 09:23 AM
I hope you can come to an agreement w/ him, because I too would feel uncomfortable with an "at-home" shot. One mistake.... You can't control what your SIL does, and maybe her dogs are in great health, but if something should go wrong, let your husband know that that visit to the vet will be much more expensive. Does your SIL have different size dogs/breeds then your pup? You can use that as a defense too, she knows how to care for her dogs, maybe not yours. Different sizes, ages, different dosage. And anyone who says "there's instructions" has never put a crib together.

hazelrunpack
April 30th, 2008, 09:29 AM
Hmmm...Miss Dorsie, pardon me, but he sounds like a controlling sonofagun. Limits the amount of money he gives you? Are you cooking/cleaning for him? Taking care of him? Helping to run the business?!?! If so, tell him that your payment for that includes proper health care for Sapphire. :shrug: And that includes vet care when you ask.

Ever thought about finding a different guy? :o

onster
April 30th, 2008, 10:46 AM
hazel, u took the words out of my mouth :o

MissDorsie
April 30th, 2008, 11:03 AM
Hmmm...Miss Dorsie, pardon me, but he sounds like a controlling sonofagun. Limits the amount of money he gives you? Are you cooking/cleaning for him? Taking care of him? Helping to run the business?!?! If so, tell him that your payment for that includes proper health care for Sapphire. :shrug: And that includes vet care when you ask.

Ever thought about finding a different guy? :o

Actually, we aren't married. He moved in with me back in '04, it started out as an agreement that he could stay until he could get back on his feet finacially. Somewhere along the line it turned into a bit more, and altho this is my house, he buys the groceries, gas, etc. He doesn't own the business, I do, but with the soaring fuel costs all my money has to go back into the business to keep it running. That's why I'm at his mercy. He drives truck for me and his wages are what's keeping me from loosing my place. We generally get along very well aside from the issue over Sapphire. I can uderstand that money is tight cause he has his own bills to pay as well. But the way I see it, if he can afford to give his kids $400.00 for car repairs, then he can afford to let me have $30.00 to take her to the vet. After all, it was his youngest son who gave her to me. To be perfectly honest, I'm just about to the point where I'm ready to find another home for her. I know lot's of better-off people who would love to have her!

pitgrrl
April 30th, 2008, 11:49 AM
I think it's time to negotiate something about not only this vet visit, but animal care in general because chances are, over the lifetime of a pet, there will be many vet visits and other unexpected expenses come up.

Could you suggest a certain sum going into a "dog care fund" every month, which you could use at your discretion?

Perhaps a discussion could be had about who is in charge of making decisions about the dog so that there doesn't need to be a drawn out argument each and every time the dog needs something?

MissDorsie
April 30th, 2008, 12:05 PM
I think it's time to negotiate something about not only this vet visit, but animal care in general because chances are, over the lifetime of a pet, there will be many vet visits and other unexpected expenses come up.

Could you suggest a certain sum going into a "dog care fund" every month, which you could use at your discretion?

Perhaps a discussion could be had about who is in charge of making decisions about the dog so that there doesn't need to be a drawn out argument each and every time the dog needs something?

That is a very good suggestion, pitgrrl ! I will give your advice my best shot and see how he responds.
:lightbulb: :highfive:

Mahealani770
April 30th, 2008, 01:42 PM
Hey there Miss Dorsie,
Pardon me for saying this, but my blood is boiling reading this post. Since when did $25.00 or $30.00 become an astronomical amount of money? Especially when it comes to taking care of your furkid. I don't take kindly to a man rationing out money to a woman and calling it her "allowance" or whatever. I know you feel like you're stuck between a rock and a hard place but I'd be re-thinking my relationship right about now. Good luck with it and let us know what happens. :thumbs up

ancientgirl
April 30th, 2008, 01:57 PM
Wow, I'm sorry you are having to deal with this. It's not like you are going to be spending that money for your pup's entire life. After their initial vaccines you really don't spend much on vet care except for yearly visits as long as they are in good health.

I don't think it's fair for him to restrict your money when you initially allowed him to move in with you. I understand he's helping you keep your business going, but it's not like you are fanning yourself on the couch eating bon-bons.

Sorry, but I don't like it when a man lets his testosterone run his actions.

I'd never even consider giving one of my pets a vaccination myself. There's just no way. And as for letting someone else administer any kind of medication towards them who isn't a professional, that's even less of a possibility.

Longblades
May 2nd, 2008, 11:57 AM
My unexpert advice is if someone guarantees the efficacy of the parvo shot you should go for it. Because shots are not guaranteed. It is not very likely but pooch can get just about everything any vaccination covers, even though vaccinated. My Lab girl had Parvo at six months of age after being fully vaccinated. Vet said it was a "break" in the vaccine or the strain of parvo had mutated. If I'd had some kind of guarantee the resulting Vet costs to keep her alive might then have been covered by the Vet. She lived to be 14 and a half BTW.

That rather unlikely (I hope) event aside, could you just keep the BF happy by asking the SIL for a copy of the receipt to show you paid for the vaccine and perhaps a small bill from her to show it was administered? Where I live rabies shots are mandatory so I would need that receipt and perhaps you would too.

It sounds like the SIL can give her all her shots? Did I get that part right? And it sounds like your Vet has already checked her over once, right?

I would ask your Vet if there is a particular strain of Parvo you should vaccinate for or a particular vaccine, just in case these can differ by where you live. I know for the Lepto. vaccine in my area it is like the human flu shot, each year they guess at what strains will be needed and covered in the shot. I don't know if Parvo is the same.

MissDorsie
May 2nd, 2008, 01:44 PM
My unexpert advice is if someone guarantees the efficacy of the parvo shot you should go for it. Because shots are not guaranteed. It is not very likely but pooch can get just about everything any vaccination covers, even though vaccinated. My Lab girl had Parvo at six months of age after being fully vaccinated. Vet said it was a "break" in the vaccine or the strain of parvo had mutated. If I'd had some kind of guarantee the resulting Vet costs to keep her alive might then have been covered by the Vet. She lived to be 14 and a half BTW.

That rather unlikely (I hope) event aside, could you just keep the BF happy by asking the SIL for a copy of the receipt to show you paid for the vaccine and perhaps a small bill from her to show it was administered? Where I live rabies shots are mandatory so I would need that receipt and perhaps you would too.

It sounds like the SIL can give her all her shots? Did I get that part right? And it sounds like your Vet has already checked her over once, right?

I would ask your Vet if there is a particular strain of Parvo you should vaccinate for or a particular vaccine, just in case these can differ by where you live. I know for the Lepto. vaccine in my area it is like the human flu shot, each year they guess at what strains will be needed and covered in the shot. I don't know if Parvo is the same.


So far as I know there is only one type of parvo vaccine, but it's made by several different companies. Apparently the brand my vet uses is gauranteed by the maker and further gauranteed by my vet. I agree that is highly unusual for anyone to do something like that.
Ron's SIL has a whole menagery of animals and has worked with animals since she was a child. It's just that the last pup we took to her for a shot, she did it outside and the poor pup bled for quite awhile afterward. It really ticked me off, but it was Ron's pup and his decision to make.

MissDorsie
May 2nd, 2008, 01:52 PM
Wow, I'm sorry you are having to deal with this. It's not like you are going to be spending that money for your pup's entire life. After their initial vaccines you really don't spend much on vet care except for yearly visits as long as they are in good health.

I don't think it's fair for him to restrict your money when you initially allowed him to move in with you. I understand he's helping you keep your business going, but it's not like you are fanning yourself on the couch eating bon-bons.

Sorry, but I don't like it when a man lets his testosterone run his actions.

I'd never even consider giving one of my pets a vaccination myself. There's just no way. And as for letting someone else administer any kind of medication towards them who isn't a professional, that's even less of a possibility.


He's definitely thinking from inside his back pocket! I also think he's been taking alot of bad advice from his friends. He's kind of gullible.

rainbow
May 2nd, 2008, 02:16 PM
[QUOTE=MissDorsie;587169] But the way I see it, if he can afford to give his kids $400.00 for car repairs, then he can afford to let me have $30.00 to take her to the vet. After all, it was his youngest son who gave her to me. QUOTE]

Exactly.....and Sapphire is also one of your kids. ;)

jealma
May 2nd, 2008, 02:35 PM
I think you did the right thing. Dogs come with responsiblity and one of those is making sure they have the proper shots , ect ect. I"m glad you did this. How did he find out you took her? Was there a bill laying around. And I"m sorry,, but I think you have a bigger problem you may need to look at,, last I checked the year was 2008.

MissDorsie
May 2nd, 2008, 03:00 PM
I think you did the right thing. Dogs come with responsiblity and one of those is making sure they have the proper shots , ect ect. I"m glad you did this. How did he find out you took her? Was there a bill laying around. And I"m sorry,, but I think you have a bigger problem you may need to look at,, last I checked the year was 2008.

He got the mail one day and in it was a postcard reminding me it was time for her second visit. He went into orbit! I'll get it figured out even if I have to cry on someone elses shoulder. Maybe one of his sisters if all else fails. :eek:

cpietra16
May 2nd, 2008, 03:32 PM
If he is soo gullible with his friends maybe he might be gullible with the vet...get your to talk your boyfriend into it...30.00 is worth it. Let him know that you will "go into orbit" if your baby dies from parvo...who will be in the dog house then?!!!!!

MissDorsie
May 2nd, 2008, 03:53 PM
If he is soo gullible with his friends maybe he might be gullible with the vet...get your to talk your boyfriend into it...30.00 is worth it. Let him know that you will "go into orbit" if your baby dies from parvo...who will be in the dog house then?!!!!!

You've got a very good point there. I know he'd miss her terribly if she died, and I would never let him hear the end of it.

chico2
May 2nd, 2008, 04:05 PM
MissDorsie,it's your house,your business and yes,he's helping you,but he also has a job and a house to live in because of you.
I've never in my cats lives had a vet-bill for only $30,he should consider himself lucky.
If he has allimony(sp?) to pay for his kids,or car-repair etc...that money is also coming from the money he makes off YOUR business.
So please be assertive in this,your pup needs proper vet-care,I doubt he would leave you for this,he is a very lucky guy to have you and I am sure he knows it..
I am certain there are millions of guys out there who would want what he has,guys who would respect your love for your pup.

MissDorsie
May 2nd, 2008, 04:16 PM
MissDorsie,it's your house,your business and yes,he's helping you,but he also has a job and a house to live in because of you.
I've never in my cats lives had a vet-bill for only $30,he should consider himself lucky.
If he has allimony(sp?) to pay for his kids,or car-repair etc...that money is also coming from the money he makes off YOUR business.
So please be assertive in this,your pup needs proper vet-care,I doubt he would leave you for this,he is a very lucky guy to have you and I am sure he knows it..
I am certain there are millions of guys out there who would want what he has,guys who would respect your love for your pup.

Would you like it if your boss told you how to spend your wages? I know I wouldn't ! After all he works very hard for them. He not only drives the truck but he also does maintenance work on it.

chico2
May 2nd, 2008, 04:25 PM
Sorry,I assumed he was more than an employee:confused:

MissDorsie
May 2nd, 2008, 04:37 PM
Sorry,I assumed he was more than an employee:confused:

Sorry, I didn't mean to confuse anyone. Yes, he is a little more than an employee, but that doesn't mean I am going to try to control him in a negative way. I don't feel like that makes for a very healthy relationship. If I play my cards right maybe he'll come around soon. It'a almost like trying to train an old stray dog, it just takes patience. :)

14+kitties
May 2nd, 2008, 04:51 PM
Tell him to go and get his sis in law to give him HIS needles!!! Leave the vet's work up to a vet!

ancientgirl
May 2nd, 2008, 07:34 PM
Sorry, I didn't mean to confuse anyone. Yes, he is a little more than an employee, but that doesn't mean I am going to try to control him in a negative way. I don't feel like that makes for a very healthy relationship. If I play my cards right maybe he'll come around soon. It'a almost like trying to train an old stray dog, it just takes patience. :)

Just remember, as you don't want to control him in a negative way he should not be doing the same to you, and putting you on an allowance and making you take your dog to someone you don't feel comfortable with isn't fair.

That's all I'm going to say.

Shaykeija
May 3rd, 2008, 01:10 AM
i would be getting this guy luggage and a one way ticket....Sapphire needs her shots.

rainbow
May 3rd, 2008, 01:20 PM
Just remember, as you don't want to control him in a negative way he should not be doing the same to you, and putting you on an allowance and making you take your dog to someone you don't feel comfortable with isn't fair.

That's all I'm going to say.


I agree. :thumbs up

Harley's_Mom
May 3rd, 2008, 02:05 PM
When Tova had a reaction to her lepto vaccine, we ended up rushing her into the vet on a Friday nite. Because the vet had administered the vaccine, they knew exactly what she was reacting to and did not charge us anything for the emergency visit. If your SIL was to administer the vaccine and Sapphire was to react, it may be harder for the vet to treat her because you have no documentation about that particular med and it could end up being a very,very expensive visit. What would your partner have to say to that??

MissDorsie
May 5th, 2008, 07:51 AM
Just wanted to let everyone know that I won! I finally got the $$$$ to take my baby to the vet! :thumbs up

ancientgirl
May 5th, 2008, 08:12 AM
Congratulations! It's so much better this way. Let the professionals handle any medication, I say. And really, it's not like you'll be taking her all the time. After she's finished with her initial vaccinations, you won't be taking her but for yearly checkups.

MissDorsie
May 5th, 2008, 09:05 AM
Congratulations! It's so much better this way. Let the professionals handle any medication, I say. And really, it's not like you'll be taking her all the time. After she's finished with her initial vaccinations, you won't be taking her but for yearly checkups.


Personally, I think the investment is well worth it. My vet is one of the least expensive I've found. Just under $200.00 to get all her shots (rabies and parvo) caught up PLUS the spay. Most other vets I called wanted over $200.00 JUST for the spay alone!
Not to mention, the Rabies shot includes the cost of the city license.
But alas, I'm going to have to hold off on getting her spayed awhile longer if we want to eat.

ancientgirl
May 5th, 2008, 09:30 AM
That's super inexpensive. My girls alone (I have cats) cost me close to $300 each for a spay!

MissDorsie
May 5th, 2008, 11:38 AM
Wow!! I've heard that the cost of living is quite a bit higher in Fla. than it is here. :crazy:

ancientgirl
May 5th, 2008, 11:52 AM
Don't get me started about the cost of living here. LOL, it would take me all day!

I'm sure I could have found a less expensive place, but I love the clinic I take them to and my vet is a great person and is always very gentle and kind with them. I could have gone somewhere a friend of mine takes her dogs, which charge $50.00, but no way did I feel comfortable taking my babies to someplace that cheap.

It was a lot of money getting the girls and boys done, but it was worth it to me because I know they were well taken care of by people who really care about animals. As a matter of fact, I went in this weekend to get some Revolution for my outside girl, and when my vet saw me she immediately asked if everything was okay with the kids. She was incredibly busy and it was nice of her to stop and ask me about my babies when she saw me.

MissDorsie
May 5th, 2008, 12:27 PM
Don't get me started about the cost of living here. LOL, it would take me all day!

I'm sure I could have found a less expensive place, but I love the clinic I take them to and my vet is a great person and is always very gentle and kind with them. I could have gone somewhere a friend of mine takes her dogs, which charge $50.00, but no way did I feel comfortable taking my babies to someplace that cheap.

It was a lot of money getting the girls and boys done, but it was worth it to me because I know they were well taken care of by people who really care about animals. As a matter of fact, I went in this weekend to get some Revolution for my outside girl, and when my vet saw me she immediately asked if everything was okay with the kids. She was incredibly busy and it was nice of her to stop and ask me about my babies when she saw me.


That's pretty nice of your vet. Mine is situated in a small town suburb a short distance from here and is none the less a very caring vet. They cater to low income clients, but give the same quality care as the more expensive ones.
I'm the kind of person who, if I don't like a Dr. (of any kind)...I won't go back, no matter how inexpensive they are. I took her to this same vet for her very first shots and check-up. The clinc is extra clean and the staff is very friendly. They all fell in love with Sapphire. :goodvibes:

ancientgirl
May 5th, 2008, 01:23 PM
I think it's super important to like your vet and feel comfortable. After all, they are taking care of your babies! A friend of mine is always on me about how I can find a cheaper vet, but I tell her it's worth it to me to know I can bring my cats to this place and know they will be taken care of as if they were their pets! The staff is always friendly, my regular vet is a doll, and so is the other vet I take my little ones too when their regular one isn't available. So I have two vets I feel really comfortable with. Even the one who isn't their regular one will ask me about my guys, so what does that tell you about the place?

I've heard horror stories from people so to find a vet, no matter what the cost, you feel good with is so important!

MissDorsie
May 10th, 2008, 11:58 AM
Just wanted to let everyone know that I won! I finally got the $$$$ to take my baby to the vet! :thumbs up


After having to reschedule her appt. twice because of car trouble, I finally got Sapphire in to see the vet today!

He said she is in perfect health and she weighed in at 61 pounds. He said that he had never seen a Lab with such a soft coat before.
I was sooo proud of her cause she never once jumped on anyone and she sat when she was told!

ancientgirl
May 10th, 2008, 01:12 PM
Great news!

chico2
May 10th, 2008, 03:41 PM
I agree,that's great news,she looks like a sweetie,maybe we could get to see some more pics;)

MissDorsie
May 10th, 2008, 04:16 PM
Here you go.....This is the new fence Ron built using her old play pen....
Top 2 Are before, bottom 2 are after.