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You need to give away two of your cats

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 01:29 PM
Yes, there it is. Once again I've been blessed with the unsolicited opinion of someone who thinks they know how I should live my life better than me.

I've been stewing over this for days. Trying to get it out of my mind, but today I can't get it out of my head. I made the mistake of leaving my anxiety pill at home and that's not helping.

My best friends husband works for a kitchen cabinet company. Now and then they have samples they just toss. I asked him a couple of weeks ago if they had any I might be able to use under the stairs for a litter keeper.

I made the huge mistake of asking him on Saturday, while we were sitting down for dinner. We were at an arts festival, he'd been drinking a bit, so of course he felt the need to tell me how I should live my life and what I should do with my huge amount of cats.

"You need to give away two of your cats. a 1,000 square foot apartment isn't big enough for 4 cats."

"They're going to start getting old and sick."

"You're going to wind up spending too much money on them."

If it weren't for the fact his kids were there I'd have told him he needed to cut one of his :censored: and shut up and mind his own business.

But since his kids were there I just smiled and told him just because he hated cats didn't mean he had to tell me what to do with mine. And to just tell me if he had any cabinets and to leave the speech for someone who would listen.

My friend kept telling him to shut up and to stop upsetting me. Finally thank goodness he did. When they dropped me off I said "Bye cat hater."

:frustrated:

Now all I'm thinking about is if my cats are happy. My apartment isn't huge, but it's not tiny either! I don't know the exact square footage, but I think they're all comfortable. They have space to run around. Places to hide, places to be alone or just do whatever.

Here's a shot from the corner:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v516/ancientgirl/New%20apartment/IMG_0665.jpg

Here's a shot from the entrance:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v516/ancientgirl/New%20apartment/IMG_0661.jpg

I've got room enough for two living areas and a dining room

Here's the bedroom from the corner:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v516/ancientgirl/New%20apartment/IMG_0668.jpg

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 01:31 PM
If I wanted to I could easily fit a king size bed and have plenty of room for a dresser and armoirer(I know I totally misspelled that), nightstand and not feel confined.

My bathroom where I keep their big litter box

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v516/ancientgirl/New%20apartment/IMG_0672.jpg


I'm just so angry! I talked to his best friend, who I know as well, and the first thing he asked me was if he was drinking, because he always says stuff like that when he's been drinking.

Yes, he was drinking, but that's no excuse to be hurtful.

I'm angry and now I'm afraid my babies aren't happy because my apartment might not be big enough for them.

Now I just wish I'd stayed home and not gone to the arts festival with them.

catsnatcher-CDN
February 18th, 2008, 01:39 PM
Why does this man's opinion mean so much to you?

onster
February 18th, 2008, 01:43 PM
awwww ancient:grouphug:

U know, even tho I think u shouldnt give a rats a** bout this guy's opinion I sometimes share ure concern thinking maybe I should have less cats, too little space ( I only have 2) but the fact of the matter is they are not in eachother's faces, there are no fights (little 'who's boss'/ rough wrestling is normal) and theyre alll perfectly healthy.

Seriously, just look at the pics u recently posted on the photo subforum and tell me those aren't happy cats? :)

Just ignore that loser, I have many ppl tell me the same because of my asthma. Someone even told me to "throw the cats out".

JanM
February 18th, 2008, 01:50 PM
I wouldn't give his comments a second thought! You know your cats are content - he sure doesn't! If he has a problem - it's his problem so I wouldn't let him make you accept any part of it!

Phooey on him :D

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 02:09 PM
Why does this man's opinion mean so much to you?

It doesn't matter. But his words are just running around in my head like a bad song and I can't get rid of them. I keep telling myself he doesn't know diddly, he doesn't live with us, but my worry-wart personality is making it hard.

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 02:18 PM
awwww ancient:grouphug:

U know, even tho I think u shouldnt give a rats a** bout this guy's opinion I sometimes share ure concern thinking maybe I should have less cats, too little space ( I only have 2) but the fact of the matter is they are not in eachother's faces, there are no fights (little 'who's boss'/ rough wrestling is normal) and theyre alll perfectly healthy.

Seriously, just look at the pics u recently posted on the photo subforum and tell me those aren't happy cats? :)

Just ignore that loser, I have many ppl tell me the same because of my asthma. Someone even told me to "throw the cats out".

I know, I'm trying to just get his words out of my head. I'm not even going to ask him again about the cabinet. I'll look for one myself. He doesn't know anything about how my cats are.

It just makes me so angry when people feel they have to give you their opinion, like they know so much

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 02:20 PM
I wouldn't give his comments a second thought! You know your cats are content - he sure doesn't! If he has a problem - it's his problem so I wouldn't let him make you accept any part of it!

Phooey on him :D

If I had a quarter for everyone who gave me their unsolicited opinion, I'd have a mansion. Believe me it makes me even angrier that I'm still even thinking on his words.

What the heck does he know?:frustrated:

Kashi
February 18th, 2008, 02:37 PM
First of all - your apartment is HUGE ! And gorgeous. I love it.

Secondly - the man is an ignorant fool - a drunk one at that - who doesn't care for cats at the best of times by the sounds of it - and was choosing to run off at the mouth. Please ignore him, and go on just loving on your cats.

Jim Hall
February 18th, 2008, 02:42 PM
If I had a quarter for everyone who gave me their unsolicited opinion, I'd have a mansion. Believe me it makes me even angrier that I'm still even thinking on his words.

What the heck does he know?:frustrated:


Yup I have been told that since i live alone i shouldnt have a pet
ive been told since i smoke i shouldnt have a pet
ive been told since i live in an apartmen i shouldnt have a pet
and at least three rescues rejected me cause my last cat died and i didnnt to a post mortem

If i listened to all of these I wouldnt hve my beautifull DU and i would be lonely so screw em only yu can decided how many and if they are happy
they seem damn happy to me

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 02:42 PM
First of all - your apartment is HUGE ! And gorgeous. I love it.

Secondly - the man is an ignorant fool - a drunk one at that - who doesn't care for cats at the best of times by the sounds of it - and was choosing to run off at the mouth. Please ignore him, and go on just loving on your cats.

Right now, I'm wishing someone has ruined his day like his words have almost ruined mine.

He really isn't a pet person. My best friend, I love her dearly, but she's not into anything that she has to trouble her self with. Heck, half the time she doesn't even want to deal with her kids.

They had a cat, it was hers, and they kept it outside for the last few years. He kept peeing on the couch, after they'd brought her sisters cat to their house. They didn't really try to remedy the situation with anything other than putting him outside where he got mauled the first month by some dog. He survived, but spent the next several years from one sickness to another, and they still kept him outside.

So they really aren't pet people, and I know my friend doesn't understand my complete love and adoration for my cats. But at least she shuts her mouth up about it.

I just need to fumigate my brain of his words.

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 02:45 PM
Yup I have been told that since i live alone i shouldnt have a pet
ive been told since i smoke i shouldnt have a pet
ive been told since i live in an apartmen i shouldnt have a pet
and at least three rescues rejected me cause my last cat died and i didnnt to a post mortem

If i listened to all of these I wouldnt hve my beautifull DU and i would be lonely so screw em only yu can decided how many and if they are happy
they seem damn happy to me

That's the thing, he doesn't live with me and my cats. How would he know if they're happy.

If they weren't happy, they wouldn't look so healthy. I think a big part of a cat's health has to do with how happy they are. They eat well, they play with each other, they have no problems.

CearaQC
February 18th, 2008, 02:58 PM
If you keep worrying about some drunken schmoe's opinion, YOU will get sick.

Don't be so hard on yourself.

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 03:00 PM
If you keep worrying about some drunken schmoe's opinion, YOU will get sick.

Don't be so hard on yourself.

You're right. I just need to get it out of my head.

They're happy, I know they are.

CearaQC
February 18th, 2008, 03:11 PM
Close your eyes, concentrate. Put the guy's words into balloons which then inhale and float away. Got to have focus, but it does work.

Either that or imagine an object that has meaning. Could be anything as long as you say this thing goes with that. For that guy it could be a doll or figurine. Mentally place it into a huge chest that has a heavy lid, lock it up, turn around and walk away.

And remember some people who drink, it's only liquid bravery that lets them feel more free to say certain things. And really, the painful sh:censored: they verbally spew is really an indication of a deeper problem that is bothering them. Some call this "mirroring," meaning they put something onto another person that's really something originating from within. They end up feeling better by inflicting pain onto someone else. So it's not you, it's them. You choose whether to allow it to bother you.

;)

otter
February 18th, 2008, 03:11 PM
Oh ancientgirl you are such a sweet heart :angel: no wonder those words hurt you. There will always be some dumb schmuck who thinks they know better than you, just know you are doing the best for those kitties and they have a great life :cloud9:

Gee wiz though, if 1000 sq ft isn't enough room for 4 cats what would he think of me in my house of 320 sq ft (probably as big as your bed room :D) and two cats and a big dog (plus 4 chickens, but they live in the shed, thank dog!):eek:

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 03:20 PM
Close your eyes, concentrate. Put the guy's words into balloons which then inhale and float away. Got to have focus, but it does work.

Either that or imagine an object that has meaning. Could be anything as long as you say this thing goes with that. For that guy it could be a doll or figurine. Mentally place it into a huge chest that has a heavy lid, lock it up, turn around and walk away.

And remember some people who drink, it's only liquid bravery that lets them feel more free to say certain things. And really, the painful sh:censored: they verbally spew is really an indication of a deeper problem that is bothering them. Some call this "mirroring," meaning they put something onto another person that's really something originating from within. They end up feeling better by inflicting pain onto someone else. So it's not you, it's them. You choose whether to allow it to bother you.

;)

Thanks. I'm going to sit and do that.

About the mirroring? They have 2 kids. He's probably wishing he could give them away, I know his wife, my friend sometimes thinks that way. She hates herself for thinking it, but she does.

jiorji
February 18th, 2008, 03:20 PM
yeah I agree......4 cats is way too much....






............2 of them need to come live with ME :laughing::cloud9: I think the kittens need to go :lovestruck::lovestruck:




my mom thinks 2 cats and a rabbit is too much....wait....she thinks TWo cats is too much :rolleyes:

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 03:22 PM
Oh ancientgirl you are such a sweet heart :angel: no wonder those words hurt you. There will always be some dumb schmuck who thinks they know better than you, just know you are doing the best for those kitties and they have a great life :cloud9:

Gee wiz though, if 1000 sq ft isn't enough room for 4 cats what would he think of me in my house of 320 sq ft (probably as big as your bed room :D) and two cats and a big dog (plus 4 chickens, but they live in the shed, thank dog!):eek:

He really was being a jerk. I'm just going sit and visualize his words going up in flames.

All my cats have ever known is being inside, except the occasional trip to the vet's office. And now I live in a bigger place than I was living in. So at least for Vlad and Oksana, the new place is like an extra world.

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 03:24 PM
............2 of them need to come live with ME :laughing::cloud9: I think the kittens need to go :lovestruck::lovestruck:

my mom thinks 2 cats and a rabbit is too much....wait....she thinks TWo cats is too much :rolleyes:

:laughing:You'll be prying those kittens from my cold dead hands Missy!

joeysmama
February 18th, 2008, 04:29 PM
OH your place looks plenty big enough for 4 cats !! I think I remember when you first moved in and you were concerned about the loft. Didn't you post these pictures then? And you installed a pretty lattice work wall?

You obviously care about your cats health and safety. This guy is just a busy body. Ignore him. I was just telling my husband a story the other night about our neighbors SIL who gave me a lecture about how I should raise my children. Well our kids are grown and mine turned out great !! Her family is a mess, in my opinion.

Unless your cats have tons of stuff I think you're fine. Did they move in with big wardrobes, exercise equipment, fax machines etc. ??? :laughing: Or are they your basic bare naked kitties with a couple bowls and a litterbox? Maybe a toy or two?

Next time he tells you that your apt. is too small tell him you have an architect coming to give you an estimate on an addition.

jiorji
February 18th, 2008, 04:32 PM
:laughing:You'll be prying those kittens from my cold dead hands Missy!

ehh...thought i'd try :laughing::laughing:

chico2
February 18th, 2008, 05:12 PM
Ancientgirl,you are waaay to sensitive,you know your cats have a wonderful life,could not have it any better..
Never ever let some drunken fool bother you,what the heck does he know.
Someone should just TRY to tell me how to care for my cats,especially a drunk,he would have an earful.:laughing:

Kristin7
February 18th, 2008, 06:16 PM
what a jerk. He obviously hates cats... your place is not that small, I have a dog and 3 cats in a house that isn't much bigger than yours. Also, I lived in an apartment once with 3 cats - it was a very small apartment, only two rooms, and my BF and I lived there too. Cats don't need THAT much space, esp if they have places to climb and hide, like a cat tree.

dmc123
February 18th, 2008, 06:51 PM
ancientgirl,

As many others have said....ignore this guy! and any others who tell you how many or what kind of critter to care for as you do.

I have some that shake their heads at me....you may remember, I have more than you do. My house is no bigger than your apartment.

Fortunately none have had the guts to say to my face - Get rid of some! Because I would say back (not ever meaning it) which one(s) would you like to adopt???

There are days I feel bad that these guys all have to share such a small place with as crazy a mom as I am - but they seem to love it. Well, they don't know anything else. I wouldn't have this many if circumstances had been different, but "most" days I love it just as it is.

Ignore those that don't understand and don't care - they just like to hear themselves speaking.

Diane

loopoo
February 18th, 2008, 06:58 PM
you need to just take three deep breaths in.. letting all positive energy envelop you.. and let those breaths out, and any crud, comments, negative energy with it:) your place looks awesome... and your kitties look beautiful and happy..

i try to live by the adage if you have nothing good to say, then shut the heck up.. of course there are times this doesnt always apply.. but then there are many who just like to hear the sounds of their own voice... and not care about the gibberish that comes out.:shrug:

you need to learn some "tuning out" exercises..:D so you dont make yourself sick with that kind of stuff...remember whats important to you, and disregard the rest of the bull$%^ :)

wdawson
February 18th, 2008, 07:15 PM
don't listen to him.....my parents think i'm just:crazy::crazy::crazy:...three cats and three dogs and seems a part-timer:laughing:....maybe i am crazy ....but i will never have it anyother way:laughing:.....and i'm in my 40's:eek:

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 07:39 PM
ancientgirl,

As many others have said....ignore this guy! and any others who tell you how many or what kind of critter to care for as you do.

I have some that shake their heads at me....you may remember, I have more than you do. My house is no bigger than your apartment.

Fortunately none have had the guts to say to my face - Get rid of some! Because I would say back (not ever meaning it) which one(s) would you like to adopt???

There are days I feel bad that these guys all have to share such a small place with as crazy a mom as I am - but they seem to love it. Well, they don't know anything else. I wouldn't have this many if circumstances had been different, but "most" days I love it just as it is.

Ignore those that don't understand and don't care - they just like to hear themselves speaking.

Diane

That's true, you do have more than I do, and all of your's seem happy too! What you said is what I believe, "they don't know anything else." All of mine have been indoor cats ever since they were tiny little things. The apartment I had before this one was smaller, I would have felt guilty having 4 there. But I think there's room here for them to all live very happily. I just hate people who talk out of their butt.

BAILEYSMUDGE
February 18th, 2008, 07:41 PM
Love your place.... may I say....cats don't need alot of space...they need alot of love... and it seems so evident to me that you easily meet that :lovestruck: requirement. I've seen your pictures... don't your cats seem happy to you?? It sure does to me. I understand that not everyone is a "cat" person... I'm not sure I am... more of an "animal" person....tee hee... listen to the four-legged advisors...they see things so much more clearly than humans. Don't you think???:shrug:

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 07:41 PM
you need to just take three deep breaths in.. letting all positive energy envelop you.. and let those breaths out, and any crud, comments, negative energy with it:) your place looks awesome... and your kitties look beautiful and happy..

i try to live by the adage if you have nothing good to say, then shut the heck up.. of course there are times this doesnt always apply.. but then there are many who just like to hear the sounds of their own voice... and not care about the gibberish that comes out.:shrug:

you need to learn some "tuning out" exercises..:D so you dont make yourself sick with that kind of stuff...remember whats important to you, and disregard the rest of the bull$%^ :)

I have some books on meditation. I need to find them and apply some of those techniques to times like this. I've got enough stress in my life. Heck, I'm happy with my life and my kitties! Maybe he's miserable with his kids.

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 07:44 PM
don't listen to him.....my parents think i'm just:crazy::crazy::crazy:...three cats and three dogs and seems a part-timer:laughing:....maybe i am crazy ....but i will never have it anyother way:laughing:.....and i'm in my 40's:eek:

Yep, I'm 40 too. I think half the time people just think they are "saving" you from being some nut who lives with 50 animals.

Hey, my place is clean, it smells like I don't even have cats, and my guys are all healthy.

When I got Maks and Kiska, my dad gave me so much grief. But I told him that they were here to stay and to please just accept it. He soon just realized these were my babies and even asks how his grandkids are now and the.

I just don't know why more people can't accept others for what they are and what they love.

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 07:47 PM
OH your place looks plenty big enough for 4 cats !! I think I remember when you first moved in and you were concerned about the loft. Didn't you post these pictures then? And you installed a pretty lattice work wall?

You obviously care about your cats health and safety. This guy is just a busy body. Ignore him. I was just telling my husband a story the other night about our neighbors SIL who gave me a lecture about how I should raise my children. Well our kids are grown and mine turned out great !! Her family is a mess, in my opinion.

Unless your cats have tons of stuff I think you're fine. Did they move in with big wardrobes, exercise equipment, fax machines etc. ??? :laughing: Or are they your basic bare naked kitties with a couple bowls and a litterbox? Maybe a toy or two?

Next time he tells you that your apt. is too small tell him you have an architect coming to give you an estimate on an addition.

Yes, I did post the pictures before with the lattice which mind you, I also had grief over. I swear, sometimes I wonder if I have a sign on my head that says "Opinions wanted." Bah! I've got enough room to not only give them the run of the place, but they have their own living room! He really needs to just shut up.

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 07:50 PM
Ancientgirl,you are waaay to sensitive,you know your cats have a wonderful life,could not have it any better..
Never ever let some drunken fool bother you,what the heck does he know.
Someone should just TRY to tell me how to care for my cats,especially a drunk,he would have an earful.:laughing:

You're right. When it comes to them, I'm very sensitive and very protective. What makes me angrier is I don't meddle in anyone elses life, so I hate when people try to mess in mine.

Also, I hate to say it, but I didn't take my medication this morning, so that didn't help.

Kristin7
February 18th, 2008, 07:54 PM
He probably is miserable. When I meet people like that, I am just glad I am not them, and I am me! Don't let him get to you... seriously, I bet he is very unhappy, and that's why he picks on others lives. Otherwise, why would he even care? That's just weird. I mean, you could shoot right back at him and say 'maybe you have too many kids, maybe you should give one away' or 'don't have any more kids, 2 is enough, maybe it is time to get 'fixed''. Although I sorta know how you feel, I've mentioned possibly getting another dog to a few friends/relatives, and I can tell they think I have enough. My parents, too, and they had 4 kids! geez... I'm sure I can handle another animal, I think they are just pissed I haven't given them any grandkids. So yes, I get annoyed too, but really, this guy sounds like he is probably not happy, so has to lash out at others, he probably sees you are happy. btw, if you need to meditate, I highly recommend taking some kind of yoga class. Even just the breathing exercises you'd be doing would help to calm down. I have anxiety attacks and insomnia almost every night, so can relate... deep breathing does help though and when I finally focus enough to do that, I can fall asleep.

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 07:54 PM
Love your place.... may I say....cats don't need alot of space...they need alot of love... and it seems so evident to me that you easily meet that :lovestruck: requirement. I've seen your pictures... don't your cats seem happy to you?? It sure does to me. I understand that not everyone is a "cat" person... I'm not sure I am... more of an "animal" person....tee hee... listen to the four-legged advisors...they see things so much more clearly than humans. Don't you think???:shrug:

I'd like to think they are very happy. I give them as much love as I possibly can. I'd give them more if I had more to give. I can't allow someone to make me feel like this again. His words totally ruined my day and I won't let that happen again.

dmc123
February 18th, 2008, 07:58 PM
That's true, you do have more than I do, and all of your's seem happy too! What you said is what I believe, "they don't know anything else." All of mine have been indoor cats ever since they were tiny little things. The apartment I had before this one was smaller, I would have felt guilty having 4 there. But I think there's room here for them to all live very happily. I just hate people who talk out of their butt.

You have plenty of room for them...on a side note, my Quads are 10 mths today....amazing to me.

Diane

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 07:59 PM
He probably is miserable. When I meet people like that, I am just glad I am not them, and I am me! Don't let him get to you... seriously, I bet he is very unhappy, and that's why he picks on others lives. Otherwise, why would he even care? That's just weird. I mean, you could shoot right back at him and say 'maybe you have too many kids, maybe you should give one away' or 'don't have any more kids, 2 is enough, maybe it is time to get 'fixed''. Although I sorta know how you feel, I've mentioned possibly getting another dog to a few friends/relatives, and I can tell they think I have enough. My parents, too, and they had 4 kids! geez... I'm sure I can handle another animal, I think they are just pissed I haven't given them any grandkids. So yes, I get annoyed too, but really, this guy sounds like he is probably not happy, so has to lash out at others, he probably sees you are happy. btw, if you need to meditate, I highly recommend taking some kind of yoga class. Even just the breathing exercises you'd be doing would help to calm down. I have anxiety attacks and insomnia almost every night, so can relate... deep breathing does help though and when I finally focus enough to do that, I can fall asleep.

I take medication for my anxiety and depression. I think Yoga sounds like a good idea. I have a book also on yoga somewhere. I should actually have a look at it and see if I can put some of the techniques to use.

I'm sure he'd prefer to not have had kids. I hate to say this but my best friend sometimes tells me she wishes they'd not had any. I know it sounds horrible, but I think she's just overwhelmed sometimes. I don't think she's the kind of person who should have had kids. I know am probably not someone who should have them.

But I love my cats, and I treat them like they are my little kings and queens. I need to tell myself not to care what he or anybody says. I know they are happy.

Kristin7
February 18th, 2008, 08:08 PM
I'm not either (about the kids - at least I know this about myself - and I am adopted, plus had to listen to my mom tell me she wished she wasn't a mother anymore, while growing up - and she wonders why I haven't given her any grandkids!!!). Is he helping her out at all??? sounds like either he isnt' helping or they are having problems. If you have to feel anything about him, feel sorry for him/them. otherwise, he's not worth your energy (he still isn't but, hey, if you're friends w/ this couple, might be the best way to look at things). About the yoga, it helps to take a class, even just one, rather than reading. Lots of places offer classes for beginners, they teach you the proper breathing techniques right off the bat, because that is probably the most important thing to get right about yoga. it really does help... or, if you have cable, there are classes on certain channels, I think pretty early in the morning. I should take my own advice in fact, lol!

btw, when I read the title of this thread, I got really scared thinking your apartment managers were making you get rid of 2 of your cats!!!

happycats
February 18th, 2008, 08:29 PM
Awwwwwww, dont let it get to you, it won't be the last time you have to endure peoples useless comments!

You have a beautiful and loving home for your cat's and 4 isn't many, I had 6 in a basement apartmant!! Please don't ever doubt yourself!!

Your doing an amazing job, and it's obvious that you love your cat's and are giving them a wonderful life!!:lovestruck:

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 09:02 PM
I'm not either (about the kids - at least I know this about myself - and I am adopted, plus had to listen to my mom tell me she wished she wasn't a mother anymore, while growing up - and she wonders why I haven't given her any grandkids!!!). Is he helping her out at all??? sounds like either he isnt' helping or they are having problems. If you have to feel anything about him, feel sorry for him/them. otherwise, he's not worth your energy (he still isn't but, hey, if you're friends w/ this couple, might be the best way to look at things). About the yoga, it helps to take a class, even just one, rather than reading. Lots of places offer classes for beginners, they teach you the proper breathing techniques right off the bat, because that is probably the most important thing to get right about yoga. it really does help... or, if you have cable, there are classes on certain channels, I think pretty early in the morning. I should take my own advice in fact, lol!

btw, when I read the title of this thread, I got really scared thinking your apartment managers were making you get rid of 2 of your cats!!!

She's my best friend, and he's normally a nice guy. But when he drinks, he thinks he's the smartest person in the world and feels the need to thrill everyone with his "knowledge."

I've decided I just need to get past it and move on. I talked to my friend this afternoon and she said she'd give him an earful. :D

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 09:08 PM
Awwwwwww, dont let it get to you, it won't be the last time you have to endure peoples useless comments!

You have a beautiful and loving home for your cat's and 4 isn't many, I had 6 in a basement apartmant!! Please don't ever doubt yourself!!

Your doing an amazing job, and it's obvious that you love your cat's and are giving them a wonderful life!!:lovestruck:

Yes, unfortunately, life is full of unwanted advice.

I do love them all so much. LOL, I just came upstairs. I heard a crash.

What did I find? Vlad and Oksana on the counter, and Kiska trying to lick the sugar cookies I'd bought from the market. I knew before I went to bed i should have put them in the microwave, but nooooo, I left them on top of the toaster oven.

Will I ever learn that my kitties are smarter than me?:rolleyes:

dmc123
February 18th, 2008, 09:15 PM
Yes, unfortunately, life is full of unwanted advice.

I do love them all so much. LOL, I just came upstairs. I heard a crash.

What did I find? Vlad and Oksana on the counter, and Kiska trying to lick the sugar cookies I'd bought from the market. I knew before I went to bed i should have put them in the microwave, but nooooo, I left them on top of the toaster oven.

Will I ever learn that my kitties are smarter than me?:rolleyes:

LOL have we been through that! More the girls than the quads, the girls love breads, cakes, cookies, etc. We have to hide in the oven, cabinets or the microwave to keep them out of tearing through the packages. I need more cabinets! LOL or stop buying human goodies!

Diane

Luba
February 18th, 2008, 09:22 PM
It sounds like maybe you were looking for some words of acceptance from the guy. Doesn't sound like he hates or dislikes cats, just is on a different wave length then you. You love your cats they love you, there is plenty of room in your apartment, it looks very open and airy.

I wonder did you mention or say anything to him like 'I hope my place is big enough' or anything like that or was this completely unsolicited?

In that event, I'd say nicely... to someone like that "I know it's hard for you to understand but we are happy we are well taken care of all of us, they take care of me and I of them. I'm glad you're concerned for their safety and their health..which leads me to the litter box issue. Do you have some left over or spare cabinets we can use your 'handywork' you're very experienced and I bet you could probably even corner the market on making some of these for other cat lovers...etc blah blah blah .... compliment the guy and he'll forget all about it. He'll be over to your apt, admiring your cats and his pride in his work.:thumbs up

ancientgirl
February 18th, 2008, 09:30 PM
It sounds like maybe you were looking for some words of acceptance from the guy. Doesn't sound like he hates or dislikes cats, just is on a different wave length then you. You love your cats they love you, there is plenty of room in your apartment, it looks very open and airy.

I wonder did you mention or say anything to him like 'I hope my place is big enough' or anything like that or was this completely unsolicited?

In that event, I'd say nicely... to someone like that "I know it's hard for you to understand but we are happy we are well taken care of all of us, they take care of me and I of them. I'm glad you're concerned for their safety and their health..which leads me to the litter box issue. Do you have some left over or spare cabinets we can use your 'handywork' you're very experienced and I bet you could probably even corner the market on making some of these for other cat lovers...etc blah blah blah .... compliment the guy and he'll forget all about it. He'll be over to your apt, admiring your cats and his pride in his work.:thumbs up

All I asked him was if he had any cabinets that they weren't using or going to get rid of. That's it. That's when he felt the need to tell me I had to get rid of two cats. I was like "huh?" It was like I stepped into some third dimension or something.

I talked to my friend, his wife and she said after what he said to me, I deserve three cabinets! And that she was going to give him an earful for being such an butthead.

Frenchy
February 18th, 2008, 09:45 PM
Why does this man's opinion mean so much to you?

Exactly ! Forget about his comment , it doesn't matter what the heck he thinks .... next time you see him : http://bestsmileys.com/rude/19.gif

:laughing:

Oh and BTW , I love your apartment !

Amy P
February 18th, 2008, 09:46 PM
I know I don't know you, and you have gotten great advice to ignore this guy..but I thought I would chime in...I hope you don't mind :rolleyes: I think your apartment is beautiful and plenty big enough. I live in an 880 sq ft home with my husband, 3 boys, 1 cat and 1 dog. We are all happy and healthy. The size of your home doesn't matter...what matters is the size of your heart! :lovestruck:

dmc123
February 18th, 2008, 09:48 PM
I know I don't know you, and you have gotten great advice to ignore this guy..but I thought I would chime in...I hope you don't mind :rolleyes: I think your apartment is beautiful and plenty big enough. I live in an 880 sq ft home with my husband, 3 boys, 1 cat and 1 dog. We are all happy and healthy. The size of your home doesn't matter...what matters is the size of your heart! :lovestruck:

Well said Amy P! Nice!

Diane

Love4himies
February 19th, 2008, 07:49 AM
I haven't seen any pictures of unhappy cats in your house, they look like they live in a kitty spa lol. Here is a :grouphug: for you.

ancientgirl
February 19th, 2008, 08:40 AM
http://bestsmileys.com/rude/19.gif

:laughing:

Oh and BTW , I love your apartment !

Frenchy, I just might do that!

LOL, thanks. It's a great apartment. I feel a lot better about things today.

I just had a bad day, and his words just kept running around in my head. I called my friend and asked her what the heck his deal was. She told me not to listen to him, and apologized for not jumping in sooner, but she was secretly happy it wasn't her on the receiving end of his tirade. :rolleyes: Anyway, she said she'd give him an earful and that I deserve 3 cabinets for taking his :censored:

I agree!

ancientgirl
February 19th, 2008, 08:45 AM
I know I don't know you, and you have gotten great advice to ignore this guy..but I thought I would chime in...I hope you don't mind :rolleyes: I think your apartment is beautiful and plenty big enough. I live in an 880 sq ft home with my husband, 3 boys, 1 cat and 1 dog. We are all happy and healthy. The size of your home doesn't matter...what matters is the size of your heart! :lovestruck:

Thanks. I don't quite know how much sq footage I have, but I realized it's spacey enough for them. They do seem happy. They have their little spots, they play, they eat, they sleep, what more could a kitty want?

krdahmer
February 20th, 2008, 11:11 AM
Hey, my place is clean, it smells like I don't even have cats, and my guys are all healthy.

When I got Maks and Kiska, my dad gave me so much grief. But I told him that they were here to stay and to please just accept it. He soon just realized these were my babies and even asks how his grandkids are now and the.

I just don't know why more people can't accept others for what they are and what they love.
I had my 6 in a space smaller than yours and we were fine, they were all healthy and happy and safe... and that is what is most important. And I also get so much grief over having so many, the costs, food, litter and vet bills... the time, the fact that I can't just travel without cat sitters... etc etc. I have learned over the years to ignore it, they really don't know... and I feel sorry for them... I have all this kitty love and they have none.:cat::cloud9: Miserable people like other people to be miserable with them... and no doubt that is what is wrong with that guy.

You're right. When it comes to them, I'm very sensitive and very protective. What makes me angrier is I don't meddle in anyone elses life, so I hate when people try to mess in mine.

I am also very sensitive and take everything personally when it comes to my kitties. My MIL made a comment to my husband about me spending too much on my cat litter... well I'm still stewing over it... what frikkin business is it of hers what we spend on cat litter??? :frustrated:

I take medication for my anxiety and depression.
I am no doctor and I know this is unsolicited advice, but we really seem to have similar anxiety/depression/OCD type issues... so I have to tell you what I've found to be a life saver.
I was on Prozac for a couple of years after being fired from a job unexpectedly, and also seeing a councillor. Then I got pregnant, had to stop both, had a miscarriage which caused a lot of issues to resurface. I went back to councilling as I was hoping to not have to take the Prozac again as we are planning to try again soon. Started to get sort of overwhelmed and obsess over things and figured I was gonna have to go back to the prozac, then I saw one of those Oprah/Dr.Oz shows and they were talking about getting enough Vitamin D, and it's effects on mood and energy. So I did more research on the net and decided it was worth a shot. I have been taking 1000ui/day for about 3 months now and although I still have frustrating moments, I feel pretty level the majority of the time... my anxiety level dropped dramatically in the first week, as I had to spend $1000 on my car and did not freak out. I got my doctor to prescribe me something fast acting for anything really high stress that might come up... but haven't had to use any yet. Anyway, that's just my :2cents:.... and I wish that someone had of suggested the D to me years ago... :)

Oh and poo on that guy... I've seen the pictures... those are 4 very happy and carefree little cats (well not little for Vlad... ;) ). :grouphug:

ancientgirl
February 20th, 2008, 11:37 AM
I had my 6 in a space smaller than yours and we were fine, they were all healthy and happy and safe... and that is what is most important. And I also get so much grief over having so many, the costs, food, litter and vet bills... the time, the fact that I can't just travel without cat sitters... etc etc. I have learned over the years to ignore it, they really don't know... and I feel sorry for them... I have all this kitty love and they have none.:cat::cloud9: Miserable people like other people to be miserable with them... and no doubt that is what is wrong with that guy.

I'd be doing all that if I had kids. So if I had kids it would be okay then? That's the thing with people. They have two kids, and they spend money on clothes, food medical bills, they both take meds for allergies and one takes medication for ADD. WTH?


I am also very sensitive and take everything personally when it comes to my kitties. My MIL made a comment to my husband about me spending too much on my cat litter... well I'm still stewing over it... what frikkin business is it of hers what we spend on cat litter??? :frustrated:

See, if you had kids she'd be talking about how much you spent on diapers. I love my cats, and yes, maybe I do spend a bit more on their litter, since I changed it often, but I use Swheat Scoop, which is fairly reasonable. Not to mention, it's my problem, I work for the money so it's up to me what to spend it on.


I am no doctor and I know this is unsolicited advice, but we really seem to have similar anxiety/depression/OCD type issues... so I have to tell you what I've found to be a life saver.
I was on Prozac for a couple of years after being fired from a job unexpectedly, and also seeing a councillor. Then I got pregnant, had to stop both, had a miscarriage which caused a lot of issues to resurface. I went back to councilling as I was hoping to not have to take the Prozac again as we are planning to try again soon. Started to get sort of overwhelmed and obsess over things and figured I was gonna have to go back to the prozac, then I saw one of those Oprah/Dr.Oz shows and they were talking about getting enough Vitamin D, and it's effects on mood and energy. So I did more research on the net and decided it was worth a shot. I have been taking 1000ui/day for about 3 months now and although I still have frustrating moments, I feel pretty level the majority of the time... my anxiety level dropped dramatically in the first week, as I had to spend $1000 on my car and did not freak out. I got my doctor to prescribe me something fast acting for anything really high stress that might come up... but haven't had to use any yet. Anyway, that's just my :2cents:.... and I wish that someone had of suggested the D to me years ago... :)

I'm going to look into that. I hate to be taking so many pills, and I know a big part of my problem is just a chemical imbalance. Maybe that will help. It's worth a try. Thank you.

Oh and poo on that guy... I've seen the pictures... those are 4 very happy and carefree little cats (well not little for Vlad... ;) ). :grouphug:

They are happy. They play with each other, they eat well, they don't fight like their going to kill each other. There's really no huge territorial issue, and they all sleep quite well on the same bed with me nightly. Even Oksana who had been sleeping on her own for a while, has come back to the bed. I really need to get a king size bed. :laughing:

krdahmer
February 20th, 2008, 02:40 PM
We got a king size bed....to have more room for us... then I had to kick hubby out to make more room for the kitties... :rolleyes::laughing: (Well that and to get away from his SNORING!!!!:frustrated:)

ancientgirl
February 20th, 2008, 02:47 PM
Well the thing is, I know they'd be sleeping against me or practically on top of me, but I get scared they might fall off the edge, especially Vlad and Oksana, who sleep on either side of my head. So I have to sleep right in the middle so they both have enough room. :laughing:

chico2
February 20th, 2008, 04:32 PM
Dahmer,that's funny you should say that,we have 2 King Sized beds and hubby and I sleep in seperate bed-rooms,also because he SNORES and the cats take full advantage of the big beds.:laughing:
I too sleep in the middle of my huge bed,to make room on either side for the cats:cat:

Magicwildwolf69
February 20th, 2008, 05:15 PM
Don't fret over it. I have a medium size apartment with three cats and a bf. (does he count as a pet) We have one bedroom and the cats all seem to be fine. Minus the fact we are having problems with one of them seeming to think I'm his worse nightmare and went after me. We're in the middle of packing stuff up and getting the Christmas stuff out of the apartment a little behind i guess :headslap:. So right now its a bit crowded. I wouldn't worry over what people say. I'm like you i may not even like the person or care what they say but it festers inside your head until you want to scream and start doubting everything you are doing. So just relax and forget him. You are right he probably wants to get rid of his kids but can't cause well he made them lol. :laughing::laughing:

ancientgirl
February 20th, 2008, 06:26 PM
Don't fret over it. I have a medium size apartment with three cats and a bf. (does he count as a pet) We have one bedroom and the cats all seem to be fine. Minus the fact we are having problems with one of them seeming to think I'm his worse nightmare and went after me. We're in the middle of packing stuff up and getting the Christmas stuff out of the apartment a little behind i guess :headslap:. So right now its a bit crowded. I wouldn't worry over what people say. I'm like you i may not even like the person or care what they say but it festers inside your head until you want to scream and start doubting everything you are doing. So just relax and forget him. You are right he probably wants to get rid of his kids but can't cause well he made them lol. :laughing::laughing:

Thanks. I read your post about your cat. I don't have a huge amount of experience, only about a year, but I remember when I was moving, my kitty Vlad acted a little strange. The fact you've got a lot of stuff around and you've messed with the normal way your apartment is, maybe that's why your kitty went off on you.