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I hate my sister in law's parents

ancientgirl
December 25th, 2007, 03:00 PM
So, I was at my brother's house this morning. I was having a good time, until my SIL's parents showed up.

They're a bit old, and I think they're a little nuts, but still, I find that's no excuse for what they said to me.

We were all sitting eating breakfast, and we started talking about pets. My SIL's mother felt the need to tell me some story about some guy who's cat slit his throat just because he stopped feeding him on the table. Then the father felt the need to tell me, in Cuba he had neighbors that ate cats. And he told me like he was telling me some cute anecdote.

As he was talking I told him I didn't want to hear it, and at one point just got up. I went into the kitchen and said to my SIL and her sister, that I wasn't meaning to be rude, but I had to get away from him. Of course, they understood thinking he was nuts for even saying such a thing.

I haven't been right since that moment. I had no pill with me to keep me calm, so I kept just telling myself I'd be out of there soon.

I went to my friend's house to give the kids their presents and get my present, and just spend some time over there, but I spent my whole time over there just wanting to come home.

I got home, and took a pill, but I just spend the last 10 minutes just crying and trying to keep myself calm.

I'm okay now, but if I never see that :censored::censored: old man and old woman again for the rest of my life, I will be eternally happy. I'm furious that I allowed him to ruin my morning and afternoon. I'm furious that he would be so ignorant as to even say something like that to another person, and I hope to high heaven he got an earful from his daughters when I left. Next time I'll just avoid them all together. Thankfully I was able to go and sit next to my brother who told me to just sit and watch TV and ignore them because they were nuts, and he basically was ignoring them too. I have to say, thank God my brother is so easy going. It was his energy that held me together while I was there.:mad:

chico2
December 25th, 2007, 03:48 PM
Ancientgirl,the man was just plain rude.there are lots of people out there like that,they know you love animals and get a kick out of it:yell:
I was at an ex-friends house for dinner a while back and she told us how her dad used to hog-tie a lamb in the kitchen and force-feed it for Christmas and how he was screaming all the time,I guess bleating is the word.
I did not eat any more,but at least my ex-friend apologized.

ancientgirl
December 25th, 2007, 03:52 PM
I was just blown away. I can't believe the insensitivity of people. And the thing is, why would he even think that would interest me. I have 4 cats! Why do you think I'd want to hear about someone feasting on them!

Ugh, I keep telling myself not to allow his stupidity ruin my day. I'm doing everything I can to just tell myself he's insane and not pay attention to what he said.

SARAH
December 25th, 2007, 04:39 PM
Some people are just plain thoughless, rude, mean, or too ga-ga to realize maybe even.

Wonder if he'll ever get to the rainbow ...

Forget him and his mean-ness, :grouphug: :grouphug: :grouphug: and enjoy the rest of your Christmas holidays!

Also, next time your brother invites you over, decline if you know those old :censored:s are going to be there!

ancientgirl
December 25th, 2007, 04:43 PM
I'm trying not to let it ruin my day.

Next time I'll just stick with my brother and just keep away from them. It's inevitable that they will show up. Only next time, I'll be prepared.

Dracko
December 25th, 2007, 06:23 PM
What a *****ing *******. There was a time in my life I'd have let people like that get to me. At 40 I've learned from life's hard knocks and would have told the guy he was unbelievably rude and I was leaving to go spend the rest of the night with my CATS...and if he wanted to come over to see if they'd slice his throat he was welcome. :censored:

CyberKitten
December 25th, 2007, 06:30 PM
I know it's easy for me to say this in retrospect but if you ever encounter them again, I would tell them you do not want to those stories- that you love your cats and those stories are inappropriate. If they persist, walk away tho I know you cannot do that at a dinner table - one would hope the hosts should ask them not to continue when they see how mu ch it distresses you!

So sorry you had to put up with that at Christmas!!!

ancientgirl
December 25th, 2007, 06:34 PM
What a *****ing *******. There was a time in my life I'd have let people like that get to me. At 40 I've learned from life's hard knocks and would have told the guy he was unbelievably rude and I was leaving to go spend the rest of the night with my CATS...and if he wanted to come over to see if they'd slice his throat he was welcome. :censored:

LOL, thank you. You gave me a very good laugh at his expense. I really wanted to tell him to just shut the Heck up, but I held myself back because I wasn't in my home, and it was my sister in laws father.

On my way home, my dad called me to ask about his "grandkids" I told him what this guy had said and he told me to forget about it and not let it ruin my day, that he's a nutty old man and has no clue. My dad is younger than my sister in law's parents, but he was brought up in that same era basically. And my father would NEVER even think about saying something like that to anyone!

As a matter of fact, here's my dad's favorite little boy, Titi.

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v516/ancientgirl/052.jpg

That old man is just plain nuts!

Dracko
December 25th, 2007, 06:38 PM
What a cute little doggie. So nice of your dad to call you, too. :thumbs up

Just keep in mind that people like that have no essense to them. They are empty inside and get feed off of negative emotion. Being nice and kind means opening yourself up and being emotional. It's just easy for a**holes to spread their **** that makes others feel like crap to get off on it.

ancientgirl
December 25th, 2007, 06:48 PM
I know it's easy for me to say this in retrospect but if you ever encounter them again, I would tell them you do not want to those stories- that you love your cats and those stories are inappropriate. If they persist, walk away tho I know you cannot do that at a dinner table - one would hope the hosts should ask them not to continue when they see how mu ch it distresses you!

So sorry you had to put up with that at Christmas!!!

I'm more calm about it now. And I've had time to think about how I'd react if that happened again. I'm going to tell my sister in law that if her father or mother ever decide to tell me a story like that again, I'm going to politely tell them I have 4 cats, that I love very much, and I am not interested in hearing about heartless people.

And I WILL do it. I'm not going to spend another afternoon like this again because of some idiot who doesn't like cats.

ancientgirl
December 25th, 2007, 06:50 PM
What a cute little doggie. So nice of your dad to call you, too. :thumbs up

Just keep in mind that people like that have no essense to them. They are empty inside and get feed off of negative emotion. Being nice and kind means opening yourself up and being emotional. It's just easy for a**holes to spread their **** that makes others feel like crap to get off on it.

He's a little sweetie. He's a Maltese and he loves to sit next to my dad on that chair and watch TV with him.

You're right. People like that have no idea the love you can get from a loving pet. They think of animals as things with no emotions or feelings.

They have no clue these are little beings that feel just as deeply as we do.

CyberKitten
December 25th, 2007, 06:53 PM
Aww, that is a cute Maltese - he is adorable!!! And good for you for standing up to them the next time. Hope you don't have to encounter it again but if you do, it's good to be ready - it is so maddening that you have to be tho. But you have the right attitude- you go girl!!

ancientgirl
December 25th, 2007, 07:06 PM
Oh, and he looks so cute after my dad's wife bathes him and makes him pretty.

He totally caught me off guard. Next time I will not allow anyone to do that. It's my Christmas too, and I'm not going to let some nut ruin it.

krdahmer
December 26th, 2007, 08:48 AM
:mad:I'm so sorry about that happening to you on christmas! in our family it was our grandfather with those horrible stories... well at first I thought I was being respectful of my elderly by ignoring them, then my mom said I could let him have it.... well now I do. I cut him off before the stories even start. I have made it very clear to all those that I spend time with that any type of animal torture stories are unacceptable, and will result in me leaving or ignoring them (the people). That man is just a jerkass who hasn't been put in his place yet.... and obviously has no social filters whatsoever!

SARAH
December 26th, 2007, 08:54 AM
Oh, and he looks so cute after my dad's wife bathes him and makes him pretty.

He totally caught me off guard. Next time I will not allow anyone to do that. It's my Christmas too, and I'm not going to let some nut ruin it.

Yes, the hardest is being caught off guard. Had you known they were going to come out with stories like that (him especially) you would have been ready with a sharp retort, but as it was you were just flabbergasted and found no response. But now you know, you are ready for them next time, if you have to. Maybe your brother told his wife and she told them ...

:mad:I'm so sorry about that happening to you on christmas! in our family it was our grandfather with those horrible stories... well at first I thought I was being respectful of my elderly by ignoring them, then my mom said I could let him have it.... well now I do. I cut him off before the stories even start. I have made it very clear to all those that I spend time with that any type of animal torture stories are unacceptable, and will result in me leaving or ignoring them (the people). That man is just a jerkass who hasn't been put in his place yet.... and obviously has no social filters whatsoever!

Totally agree. Respecting the elders is fine, but it doesn't give them the right to walk all over the younger generations. There are things you simply keep to yourself or discuss with like-minded people. Politics, religion and animal cruelty are three of those subjects!

ancientgirl
December 26th, 2007, 01:30 PM
I agree, we should be respectful of our elders, but it doesn't give them the right to say anything they want without regard to someone's feelings.

I will certainly not be caught unaware next time!

kiara
December 26th, 2007, 05:46 PM
Hating people for such comments is very harsh. It tells me something about you. You are young and naive, life will teach you many lessons. If I were you, I would settle your differences in a nice way. Tell them the truth that talking about animals in such a way upsets you terribly. And that you are truly a huge animal lover. Your brother should tell them not to talk like that at X-mas or any other time, since this is a taboo subject for you.

ancientgirl
December 26th, 2007, 06:09 PM
Hating people for such comments is very harsh. It tells me something about you. You are young and naive, life will teach you many lessons. If I were you, I would settle your differences in a nice way. Tell them the truth that talking about animals in such a way upsets you terribly. And that you are truly a huge animal lover. Your brother should tell them not to talk like that at X-mas or any other time, since this is a taboo subject for you.

I'm not young, and I'm far from naive. I don't appreciate people who are mean spirited, even though they believe they aren't being that way.

I stated repeatedly to him I didn't want to hear his story, that I had 4 cats, and it bothered me. He knew I had 4 cats I love very much. His own daughter got up to get away from him. He kept telling the story, smiling, regardless of my wishes. Then when he finished his story his wife kept on with hers. After she'd already heard me telling her husband I didn't want to hear it.

They are constantly saying nasty things about other people and giving their opinions when they are not wanted or asked for.

So I think that I have every right to hate them for ruining my day and getting me to the point of having an anxiety attack after I hadn't had one in months.

chico2
December 27th, 2007, 07:47 AM
You can choose your friends,but not your relatives...this man obviously takes a twisted pleasure in shocking others,maybe an attention-seeker,but a sick one.
Hate is a strong word,but but probably the one I would have chosen too.
If I had been the host of this party,I would have stopped this man,before anyone got upset,he was beeing rude and insensitive,no matter his age and should have been told so.:2cents:

Kristin7
December 27th, 2007, 10:57 AM
It was extremely rude and insensitive of them to say those things after you told them their stories bothered you. We all have different life experiences but certainly they could have stopped when you expressed how much you didn't want to hear it. I probably would have told them off... sometimes people don't realize the effect they have on others until they are directly confronted. Of course, sometimes it is better to ignore and keep the peace. Holidays are tough as we get thrown together with people we normally would not choose to be around. If it makes you feel any better, I seriously doubt the story about a cat slitting someone's throat is true at all. Sounds highly unlikely or even impossible, to me.

ancientgirl
December 27th, 2007, 11:06 AM
Fortunately, I don't consider this nut my relative. But he's unfortunately my SIL's father and so I have to see him at family functions. We don't have many of those and thankfully next time I'll know to just keep away from him AND his wife!

LOL, I have to say, I found the cat slitting the man's throat utterly ridiculous! I can't even believe she thinks it's a true story, but she's of the generation that believes cats give people diseases and take their breath while they are sleeping.

clm
December 27th, 2007, 05:59 PM
Fortunately, I don't consider this nut my relative. But he's unfortunately my SIL's father and so I have to see him at family functions. We don't have many of those and thankfully next time I'll know to just keep away from him AND his wife!

LOL, I have to say, I found the cat slitting the man's throat utterly ridiculous! I can't even believe she thinks it's a true story, but she's of the generation that believes cats give people diseases and take their breath while they are sleeping.

My neighbor believes that in Italy (her grandmother told her this and she really believes it), that there are snakes that walk on their tails, standing as tall as a cow and they wrap themselves around a cows neck and strangle it. :laughing: She looked so upset when I laughed at her when she told me, but I couldn't help it. :laughing:

A lot of these stories these people have been told over the years by previous generations and they really believe them. Instead of educating themselves on the way nature and animals really work, they continue to believe and pass these stories on.

Cindy

ancientgirl
December 27th, 2007, 06:06 PM
Yes, they have tons of stories like that from Cuba.

At their age, I doubt they would believe any explanation to the contrary.