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I think I did the right thing. Why do I feel so bad?

Stacer
November 1st, 2007, 08:21 PM
I work in High Park in Toronto (156 hectares of parkland and natural areas in the the heart of Toronto). We see alot of feral cats in the park, but today was different. I do ecological restoration and we were removing some invasive plant species in a natural area of the park and we could hear soft meowing nearby, then another soft meow in the other direction. We spotted the two tiny balls of fluff, maybe about 8 - 10 weeks old. They meowed at us all day and followed us around as we worked. It was very distracting, lol.

They wouldn't get too close, but we could tell they were hungry and they would respond and move closer to us if we meowed back at them. Anyways, at the end of the day I decided I wanted to capture them and bring them home, then figure out what I would do with them. I couldn't leave them there, they were so NOT feral, more than likely dropped off in the park by some low life and obviously had no survival instincts. So I had them follow me to a nice clear spot, one of my coworkers got a can of salmon and a box and we got them in the box in no time. Unfortunately, one of the kittens bit me straight through my middle fingernail and I bled like crazy. Needless to say this freaked me out and all I could think of was rabies and infection. Then I started thinking about not knowing what these two babies could have and bringing them into my house with my 2 other cats and exposing them to something (plus I don't really have an extra room to segregate the kittens from Angus and Finn). My co workers and I discussed it and we thought that surrendering them to the humane society would be the best for them. I took them by myself, I nearly had a breakdown with the volunteers and I almost took them back before I signed the papers. I feel so guilty, I could have given them such a great life, but I was so frantic after being bitten, and I've never socialized cats before. Why do I feel so bad even though the volunteers assured me that I did the right thing?

I then made the mistake of visiting the cats that are up for adoption, which made me so sad, I left and cried the whole way home. The horrible thing is that because I am the one that surrendered them, I cannot adopt them. I understand their reasons for this, but I would be more than willing to pay for the cost of all the shots, vet care, etc... incurred while they're there. I feel like s**t.

Oh yeah, I did go to the doctor about the bite, I've got antibiotics and the cat will be observed for signs of rabies, the likelihood is low that the little guy has it.

hazelrunpack
November 1st, 2007, 08:39 PM
You did what you thought was right. Your concerns were legitimate There's no reason to second-guess yourself. :grouphug: I think you feel badly because you're expecting too much from yourself.

They're way better off at the shelter, getting care, than they are out in the Park! :fingerscr that they'll be placed quickly--kittens usually are, aren't they?

The Pack sends magical healing setter spittle to put on your booboo (yes, they've all had their shots! :D) Hope your finger is better soon! :fingerscr Your heart, too. :grouphug:

Stacer
November 1st, 2007, 08:48 PM
Thanks Hazel. I really was expecting too much I think. You see something so tiny and helpless and you know that someone put them there and you just wanna scoop them up and make everything alright for them.

Lukka'sma
November 1st, 2007, 08:53 PM
The only thing I can say to you is this:
21 years ago I had the pleasure of adopting my sweet, devoted, companion Nugget:rip:. because a kind person like yourself found him abandoned and brought him to a shelter where he waited for someone like me to come and find him. When I walked down the row of cats he stuck his tiny paw out and touched me, I loved him instantly. I was fortunate enough to have 17 years with him and now I have 17 years worth of the most cherished memories of him. Thank goodness he was turned into the shelter. He brought so much to my life, these little kittens will do the same some day for the people that adopt them.

t.pettet
November 1st, 2007, 09:58 PM
I think you saved them from starving, freezing to death (winter's coming) or being attacked by other animals. They're warm, fed, getting socialized, vaccinated and will be adopted - they wouldn't have lasted long on their own. You did a great thing for these kittens.

luckypenny
November 1st, 2007, 10:10 PM
You did do the right thing Stacer. Just like Lukka'sma's experience, a very kind woman had found a dog tied to a lamp post in the sweltering July sun. Apparently she had seen him for quite some time before she realized he was abandoned. She did bring him home thinking she would keep him. But when she arrived home from work the next evening, she discovered he had attempted to tear her home to pieces (as a result of severe separation anxiety). She felt she couldn't deal with this so brought him in to a shelter. And boy am I glad she did! Two months later, I met our Lucky boy and can not possibly imagine my life without him.

Accept it as fate that you found these little kitties. One day soon, someone will think of the kind person who found them and be thankful to her for her act of compassion :).

rainbow
November 2nd, 2007, 02:02 AM
I also think you did the right thing. :angel: They never would have survived the winter on their own. :grouphug:

Stacer
November 2nd, 2007, 09:31 AM
Thanks guys. I've had a night to reflect and calm down. I've never captured animals like that before and I know my emotions definitely screwed me up. They're definitely better off at the HS than in the park with the hawks, foxes, raccoons and big feral toms. I just hope that they are adopted out together, they definitely had a close bond. I wish we'd taken some pics, one of them looks just like Angus did when he was a baby, brown tabby. The other was long haired, so fluffy, and her tabby fur was like it had been washed of all it's colour except her face which was a vibrant brown/orange, definitely a couple of cuties. I wonder how long it will take for them to get up on the HS website?

luckypenny
November 2nd, 2007, 09:39 AM
I wonder how long it will take for them to get up on the HS website?

Seeing they're little kittens, they may get adopted quickly and not even get on the site :goodvibes: .

ancientgirl
November 2nd, 2007, 10:39 AM
In my apartment complex there are 3 cats. I can't say they are completely ferel, but I've thought often of taking in one that I've taken to feeding whenever i see her. I ultimately realized I don't know anything about socializing an animal that has been ferel or semi ferel. I feed her and she pretty much, like the other two, stick to the inside of the apartment complex. I have also seen the others getting food.

I think you did the right thing by taking the little ones to a shelter. They will be checked, socialized and given lots of attention. They'll be adopted in no time.

We want to take them all in, believe me, I totally understand how you feel.

Frenchy
November 2nd, 2007, 11:18 AM
Stacer , you probably saved their lives ! And don't worry , kittens get adopted real fast. :grouphug:

krdahmer
November 2nd, 2007, 11:43 PM
I went to a barn last year with a lady from the rescue to capture a few kittens living with their mother, we didn't really think it through and when I finally got a hold of one by the scruff, well it wasn't close enough to it's head and it did the exact same thing bit clean through my thumb and thumbnail... it was jarring and hurt like h e l l ! I had to go to the hospital but we ended up getting three of them and they all have homes now I've heard. The rescue woman also went back and caught the mom and had her fixed and the lady with the barn is feeding her and one of her kittens.

You did what you thought was right, and was thinking pretty clearly considering I would say. I know how you feel, the pangs of guilt etc, I had to stop fostering because of Fagan's flea allergy and lack of space for segregating... you have to put the welfare of your pets first. But I know sometimes I just feel like I'm not doing enough.

growler~GateKeeper
November 3rd, 2007, 01:00 AM
Stacer I also think you did the right thing :thumbs up & kittens are always adopted quickly :cloud9:

Stacer
November 3rd, 2007, 03:02 PM
Thanks, a few days has passed and I feel much better about it. I really appreciate all the words of encouragement, hearing it from people who've been there definitely makes a difference. Now my biggest problem is that the antibiotics I'm on for the bite actually smells like cat pee and they leave a horrible after taste that makes me want to vomit. :sick: :wall:

Frenchy
November 3rd, 2007, 07:59 PM
Now my biggest problem is that the antibiotics I'm on for the bite actually smells like cat pee and they leave a horrible after taste that makes me want to vomit. :sick: :wall:

Take it as a thank you from them. They're kittens , they don't know any better :laughing: