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Should I give up one of my cats, bad idea?

Ryanh
September 19th, 2007, 12:09 PM
We have 2 cats, both about 4-5yrs old, they have been living together as indoor cats for almost 3yrs now. We are having problems now since we have brought in a new puppy to the household, the one cat Charlie a larger orange tabby does not get along with the dogs. Very often he gets himself cornered with our one dog a 75lb lab/pit cross trying to play with him, he paws at the cat, moans and barks...he's harmless, but Charlie has a freakout, he'll hiss, swat, scratch the dog and then run away with the dog in chase. That is a normal day for us, then we got our French Mastiff puppy and she is joining in on the fun barking and chasing the cat. Poor Charlie is getting double teamed and ends up living in the basement most of the time, the problem is that he makes such a commotion when the dogs even get near him that the dogs think its a game and that just makes it worse. THe other cat Mocha is fine with the dogs, she generally ignores them and with no reaction from her the dogs usually leave her alone.

So my thinking is give Charlie to a friend of mine who really wants a cat and just loves Charlie since it seems keeping him in this household might be stressing him out, does this seem like a good idea or not?. Also the part that concerns me is separating the cats, they aren't exactly soulmates,but they do play with eachother sometimes.

Looking for some opinions.

sugarcatmom
September 19th, 2007, 01:13 PM
Before you resort to giving up your cat, maybe read this article (http://www.labadoption.org/linkpages/DogBehave/Articles/Cats.pdf) on ways to get your dogs to behave around the cat. Although the pups may not mean any harm, it could still get dangerous (for both the cat and the dogs) if they aren't taught more appropriate behaviour. If nothing works, then ya, maybe a calmer home would be kinder for Charlie. But remember that being rehomed will also be stressful for him, so if there's a way to make it work and teach your dogs not to go after him in the first place, that would be ideal. Good luck.

krdahmer
September 19th, 2007, 01:19 PM
You had two cats, they got along fine, added two dogs and the dogs are the problem now so you get rid of the cats?:frustrated: Seems a little unfair in my opinion. It's your choice, you have to do what you feel is right for your house, but perhaps better training the dogs might be a more fair option (there may be trainers that teach them how to react to cats), instead of uprooting the two pets you had first. The cat is reacting that way because he is feeling threatened by the dogs. You are right when you say that it isn't fair for the poor cat to be stressed all the time, so if you don't or can't train your dogs to leave him alone, maybe he is better off in another more calm and safe environment (allowing the dogs to corner and chase him is a very bad idea, the more they get away with that the more they may think its a fun game but if he is hissing and growling and swatting he is really scared not angry).

Best of luck in your decision.

Ryanh
September 19th, 2007, 01:46 PM
I suppose I could work more on training the dogs to leave the cat alone, it would be much easier if he didn't spaz out when the dogs approach him, that there is the problem as the other cat just ignores them so they almost never bother her. Also we are in the process of finding a bigger home so perhaps having more room will help since our current place is a smaller townhouse.

Love4himies
September 19th, 2007, 02:19 PM
I had a problem with this post because I did not think it fair to disrupt a current pet because a new one came into the house. On the other hand if the cat is too stressed perhaps he won't mind going to a quieter home.

I would give it some time before I made any decisions and try to train the pup calmer approaches to the cat. The dogs should not be allowed to think chasing a cat is OK, just like chasing a child is not OK. I can't give you any training tips because I am a cat person with little experience with dog training. If you decide to go this route, I know there are alot of people on the forum who are excellent with dogs.

krdahmer
September 19th, 2007, 02:27 PM
Space is always a factor... I heard somewhere that you should have a bedroom per pet.... (so I need to find myself a 6 bedroom mansion somewhere! :rolleyes:) Moving to a larger place will help a bit, but I think the main thing is training the dogs, the cat will always react like that if they continue to feel threatened, and cornered by a dog I imagine is very scary for a cat! I know many on this board have happy dog/cat households so I'm sure they will have some helpful tips for you.:)

Also do you have a cat tree, or any cat beds with tops? Cats most definitely need spots where they can quickly access for hiding. And a sturdy cat tree that is tall enough to have spots the dogs can't reach (and of course they have to be off limits to the dogs), might give your cats a place of refuge away from the dogs.

clm
September 19th, 2007, 02:35 PM
My Mookie is pretty much living on the stairs or the second floor since we got the puppies. She comes down if they're outside or sleeping. Squeak moves around the ground floor like a bolt of lightening jumping up on her cat tree in the living room to escape from them from time to time. Been through this all before with different cats and puppies, the puppies mellow out and the cats calm down. The cats may never like the dogs but they'll each find their own niche.

Cindy

CyberKitten
September 19th, 2007, 04:29 PM
I agree - you ae being unfair to the cats. There is a proper way to introduce dopgs and cats so that they all can coexist with one another.

My advice is to start over. If you cannot make it work, I would never give away the cat. She was there first and this is her home!! It would be grossly unfair for Charlie to pay for the dog's inability to understand her and an improper start.

Try it again. Make sure the cats feel secure and have a safe place and supervise them. Do NOT allow the dogs to attack Charlie that way. Your actions sound as though they think it's fine. This is wrong. You need to correct the dogs. Praise them when they are good to Charlie. This is not Charlie's fault. and he should nt have to pay for someone else's mistake. Cats do not adjustr well to change so a new home should be the absolute last option.

Maybe the dog is having a hard time in your home. I have 4 cats and if a new dog could not adjust, as the newcomer, he would be the one I would consider finding a home for but I would never actually abandon any pet. Never have, never will.

Ryanh
September 19th, 2007, 04:33 PM
The cat does insitate it quite a lot, he sneeks up on the dog to sniff him, then the dog turns around and the hissing and slashing starts or the dog just walks by the cat with no interest and Charlie swats the dog. So for those cat lovers that think I'm be unreasonable its both cat and dog that are equally the problem.

I'll make a point of keeping the dog from going after the cat and hopefully we will get a bigger house soon, that should help the problem. rehoming the cat to my friend was the last thing I wanted to do since I really love Charlie, I simply wanted some opinions on this.

Ryanh
September 19th, 2007, 04:36 PM
I agree - you ae being unfair to the cats. There is a proper way to introduce dopgs and cats so that they all can coexist with one another.

My advice is to start over. If you cannot make it work, I would never give away the cat. She was there first and this is her home!! It would be grossly unfair for Charlie to pay for the dog's inability to understand her and an improper start.

Try it again. Make sure the cats feel secure and have a safe place and supervise them. Do NOT allow the dogs to attack Charlie that way. Your actions sound as though they think it's fine. This is wrong. You need to correct the dogs. Praise them when they are good to Charlie. This is not Charlie's fault. and he should nt have to pay for someone else's mistake. Cats do not adjustr well to change so a new home should be the absolute last option.

Maybe the dog is having a hard time in your home. I have 4 cats and if a new dog could not adjust, as the newcomer, he would be the one I would consider finding a home for but I would never actually abandon any pet. Never have, never will.

wow, you make me sound like a ruthless animal abandoner. Some of you people take this wayyyy to seriously.

ancientgirl
September 19th, 2007, 04:50 PM
wow, you make me sound like a ruthless animal abandoner. Some of you people take this wayyyy to seriously.

You adopt one child, then adopt another one. The first child doesn't like the the new one. Do you then give away your first child simply because the two don't get along?

It's kind of the same thing. Your cat was there first and its important for the "new comer" to understand that the behavior they are exhibiting isn't right.

As for some people here taking this wayyy too seriously, how should this be taken? These are pets, with feelings, and to many here members of the family. They are not some disposable piece of furniture that you give away when they no longer work or are comfortable.

You took responsibility to have these animals, and have had the cats for a long time. As their owner and the human in this its up to you to do what you can to make it work, and that means make the dog understand the cat is above him in the totem pole and has to be respected.

growler~GateKeeper
September 19th, 2007, 07:15 PM
The cat does insitate it quite a lot, he sneeks up on the dog to sniff him, then the dog turns around and the hissing and slashing starts or the dog just walks by the cat with no interest and Charlie swats the dog. So for those cat lovers that think I'm be unreasonable its both cat and dog that are equally the problem.

Charlie is not instigating when he is sneaking up to sniff the dog, he is trying to get to know him when she sees the dog is calm. If the dog didn't move Charlie wouldn't react with hissing & swatting. Any movement by the dog & the cat automatically thinks the dog is going to chase him, therefore Charlie is defending himself.

Example: my sister has 3 cats then she got a cocker spaniel puppy - the dog has always been told she is not to chase the cats & would get a time out if she tried. Cat #1 is fine with the dog doesn't matter if the dog chews on Cat #1 he doesn't care. Cat #2 with time & no chasing is okay now with the dog providing she doesn't try to chase him - otherwise he hides. Cat #3 is scared of most everyone except family & hides much of the time she does not like the dog. The dog has learned very quickly on her own if Cat #3 jumps on the couch to sit w/family & the dog is already on the couch she doesn't move not even an inch or Cat #3 will hiss, growl & swat @ her. If Cat #3 is walking from one room to another the dog has learned all on her own to stay where she is & allow Cat #3 to go first & no one gets hurt or hissed at. It took the dog awhile to learn not to chase the cats & to learn that Cat #1 is okay to play with.

So even the act of your dog walking past Charlie is seen by Charlie as a threat because (correct me if I wrong but it sounds like) the only interaction Charlie has had with the dog is being chased - everytime the dog moves near Charlie is to chase him.

Several years ago I rescued an adult dog (Cally) & brought him into my home with my 2 adult cats whom both grew up with dogs but had been years since a dog was in the house. Cally in his previous home friendly-chased his buddy the cat & this was their game. Cally tried that when he saw Mischief & Duffy "oh boy 2 cats to play with". Well they would have none of it & I right away told him not to chase - Mischief growled & hiss telling him in no uncertain terms she wasn't putting up with that. Duffy hid on the 3rd floor (where Cally was not allowed) for a week & wouldn't go anywhere near him, after Duffy realised Cally was behaving himself & there would be no more chasing, they became best buddies for the 6 years I had Cally before he passed.

I'm not saying this will happen with your pets but it can happen given the right introduction, training & time.

I think you need to give them more time,
the cats need a room to retreat to where the dogs are not allowed,
teach the dogs not to chase the cats - try a new word for this command (no is used too much & often tuned out by dogs - they hear it too much for everything),
then try to re-introduce them slowly.

t.pettet
September 19th, 2007, 10:38 PM
Your large dog weighs 75lbs and your cat weighs 10lbs? This chasing might start off as a game for the dogs but could easily escalate to become serious 'chase down and kill the prey'. Your new pup is not learning to respect the other pets in your household or you by following actions of the older dog. I'd be terrified too if I were in the cats paws. He probably would be better off in a more sensitive, safe and caring home.

Love4himies
September 20th, 2007, 07:24 AM
If your cat is trying to sniff the dog, it is only trying to get to know it, that is how they identify who is who. The dog should be trained NOT to chase the cat, period.

It is not fair to your cat to be traumatized in its home, where it should feel secure. This is not your cat's fault, it did not have a choice on whether to bring a puppy into the home. You have taken the responsibilty of being their guardian, and it is now your responsibilty to ensure they feel secure and peaceful in their home. Sorry to be so blunt, but it is the way I feel.

I wish I had some training tips on how to train your dog, but like I said earlier, I am not doggie smart.

Rottielover
September 20th, 2007, 08:07 AM
I do not believe any of this is the cats fault. The dog is too rough, and not giving the cat any space.
Teach the dog to leave the cat alone, and you will have more peace at home, and the cat will thank you for it

want4rain
September 20th, 2007, 08:29 AM
You adopt one child, then adopt another one. The first child doesn't like the the new one. Do you then give away your first child simply because the two don't get along?

i have to strongly disagree here, its nothing like having children. i dont mean to ruffle any feathers but comparing your pets to children isnt reasonable. in having had children and pets, my pets do not resemble the love for my children in the slightest. to compare the two is like comparing surgery to murder.

As for some people here taking this wayyy too seriously, how should this be taken? These are pets, with feelings, and to many here members of the family. They are not some disposable piece of furniture that you give away when they no longer work or are comfortable.

if she were thinking of 'rehoming' her couch, i highly doubt she would ahve come to a forum asking for advice on the best way to do it. i thought it was pretty clear that she didnt want to rehome her cat but that it was an option. given the situation, if i had a home for a pet that was near by, with someone i trusted and could visit, i think i would talk about rehoming that one too. the alternative is to rehome the one to an unknown situation... regardless of 'who was first' or 'whats fair'. Baby Girl hates how busy our house is. she was here before Mister, Frances and Jeffrey. should i find a new home for them?? or her??

You took responsibility to have these animals, and have had the cats for a long time. As their owner and the human in this its up to you to do what you can to make it work, and that means make the dog understand the cat is above him in the totem pole and has to be respected.

not everyone understands this is an option. yes, we all should be educated before getting a dog but lets face it, its not an ideal world. sooooo many dogs wouldnt have homes at all if those who werent educated first didnt get their dogs. at least they DO have homes, food and shelter. she is here, asking for help. respect that. we all started out somewhere.

sorry ancientgirl, for ripping up your post but this poor woman (man??) is here asking for help and a bunch of people tell her she is being unfair without really thinking of her situation. there is a whole lot of judging going on.

Ryanh- there are ways to train your dog to NOT torment your cats. its a long and hard process but all of us with dogs and cats are doing it or have done it. there is a light at the end of the tunnel. perhaps starting a new thread on how to train your dog to NOT torment your cat (i wouldnt mind lerking that one!!!! mine seems to think my cats are fun things to chase too!!) would help?? or you can browse through Training Talk to see if someone had started a thread and gotten a response?

anyways, as everyone else has said, its NOT fair for your dog(s) to chase and torment the cats like that BUT there is a light at the end of the tunnel. contrary to cartoon logic, dogs dont have to chase cats. :rolleyes:

keep us posted!

-ashley

Love4himies
September 20th, 2007, 09:27 AM
i have to strongly disagree here, its nothing like having children. i dont mean to ruffle any feathers but comparing your pets to children isnt reasonable. in having had children and pets, my pets do not resemble the love for my children in the slightest. to compare the two is like comparing surgery to murder.

-ashley

I think ancientgirl was trying to say that pets are not disposible, just like children are not and pets come with the same type of responsibilty. What happens if you have two children that do not get along at all? You try to work and train them on how to by setting up rules and boundries to teach them to respect each other.

Ryanh, do you know any good dog trainers that may be able to come to your home to assist you with this issue?

want4rain
September 20th, 2007, 11:43 AM
i know Love4himies, im really not trying to be harsh, im just asking for some understanding and not judgment. the OP came here for alternatives to rehoming her cat, a plea for understanding and education. making her feel like a terrible person for the thought of rehoming this cat when that was the most well thought our alternative given the OP's knowledge.

when i came here, i had thoughts of rehoming Shadow because he didnt get along with Jeffrey. thankfully i got some suggestions to work with first before rehoming him. im glad i didnt get this kind of welcome when i came because i would have run screaming in the other direction. no one has any room to judge. we all do somethign wrong and to assume you have the right to JUDGE another human being is common but still not right.

which is not to say i dont judge... but i would hope someone would call me out on it if i did. :o :o :o


anyways, im not trying to be harmful, all of this here is because of love and compassion. ancientgirl didnt say what she said to torment the OP. she said it out of a love and compassion for cats, her reaction was based on her education and understanding that cats and dogs can coexist.

-ashley

ancientgirl
September 20th, 2007, 11:55 AM
want4rain, I was reacting to her suggestion that we were taking things way too seriously.

Yes, I do take it seriously, because the question she posted was serious. I got the feeling she thought this was going to be some easy answer and everyone would react like it was no big thing.

I was also reacting to the fact she seemed to not quite want to understand her cats feelings a little better, especially since the cat has been there longer than the dog. Suggesting that the cat was instigating the problem as well, when all its trying to do is understand what is going on and try to live without being chased around.

Ryanh
September 20th, 2007, 11:56 AM
Thanks for the kind words Ashley :thumbs up


I'm finding this place less and less welcoming since I find myself getting judged or lectured about how this is wrong and I'm a bad person etc.

I said in my 2nd & 3rd posts that yes, I was going to work on training the dog to respect the cat more, stop it from chasing and NOT rehome the cat, it seems that only my first post was the one read by most of you and you decided to judge me on that unfairly and ignore my replies.

I can get the dog to stop going at the cat just by using a firm leave it and he knows that he's been bad, so I can control the dog as long as I'm in the room. My whole intention of this was simply to ask that should I choose to give Charlie to my friend who would certainly give him a good home free of dogs is that a bad idea or not? would that emotionally hurt him and the other cat? or would he be happier in a dog free home, thats all i wanted to know, i didn't need rude lectures or judgements on something I was not even asking advice on.

The cat is staying, the dogs are going to get trained and this is probably the last thread I will start here again.

..Ryan

Ryanh
September 20th, 2007, 12:05 PM
ancientgirl, yes you as well as others take this too seriously, i mean that by the fact that you and others did not help me out by answering my question, instead I was cornered and ridiculed for being sooo wrong in my thinking. Taking it too seriously and missing the whole point, too seriously as in obsessive about their beliefs and stubborn.

ancientgirl
September 20th, 2007, 12:14 PM
I don't think its obsessive to care about an animals feelings. If that's how you feel then we will agree to disagree here.

sugarcatmom
September 20th, 2007, 12:14 PM
The cat is staying, the dogs are going to get trained and this is probably the last thread I will start here again.

..Ryan

Glad to hear that you're going to try some training, and sorry that you feel driven away. I hope you change your mind. In the meantime, please read the link I posted above, and in case you (or anyone else) can't read PDFs, I'll copy/paste it here. It has some good, simple advice.

How can I get my dog to leave my cat alone?

Anyone who has ever watched cartoons has seen the classic
battle between dog and cat. Some of us can think back to
cats and dogs we have had and wonder where cartoons get
these ideas. Others of us feel that these cartoon scenes are
acted out in our living rooms daily, especially if we are introducing a new
dog into our household.

All dogs are driven to chase things; some may have a stronger drive than
others. In a dog’s eyes cats are wonderful to chase. They are small, furry,
and have those wonderful long tails. Cats are also usually pretty fast and
can lead a dog on a merry chase, which only makes the dog want to do
it again and again. If we could only teach those cats not to run away!
That is beyond my expertise, so the focus of this article is what we can do
to help the dog stop chasing the cat.

Properly introducing the dog and cat can help things go harmoniously
from the start. Never force the cat to meet the dog. Cats are cautious by
nature and will approach when they feel safe. Crating or tethering the
dog so the cat can get close without having to worry about running can
go a long way toward making the cat feel better. Making sure that the
dog is in the presence of things the cat loves, such as her favorite toy or
cat nip, can also help things along. However, there are times when even
the most careful introductions won’t make Kitty and Fido best friends.
That’s where the rest of this article comes in.

First of all, make sure that you have a safe place for the cat to go. You
can use a baby gate, jerry-rig a door to open only wide enough for the
cat to slip in, or actually install a cat door in the interior door. (If your dog
has full run of the house, you may need to make a safe place for your cat
on all levels of you home.) In the cat’s sanctuary, have at least her litter
box and water. Make sure the sanctuary is a place the cat likes to go.
We use the master bathroom, which is where the cats have everything
they need: food, water, litter box, and a window to watch the birds and
squirrels. They love it there and have since before we got the dogs.
The next thing you should do is work on basic obedience commands with
your dog in a distraction-free environment. “ Sit” , “ stay” , and “ come” are
a minimum and they should be very reliable off leash and out of your
arm’s reach. As the dog gets good at these with minimum distractions,
gradually add distractions. Keep in mind that the cat may be the highest
level distraction, so it could be awhile before you are ready to introduce
her to your training sessions.

While you are working on reliable obedience, either separate the
dog and cat or tether the dog to you when he is in a place
where he might encounter the cat. use a simple leash tied to
my belt loop. (Take caution in doing this – if your dog can
pull you off your feet, don’t risk getting hurt! Work more on separating the
dog and cat until you feel more comfortable with their interaction.) When
the dog sees the cat and tries to get her, I stop dead and wait. Saying
things to the dog at this point, especially rapidly repeated things (i.e. “ no
no no no!” ) will just get him more excited, so I wait silently.
As soon as the dog puts any slack in the leash at all (and this could take several minutes),
praise the dog wildly with treats, a game, and/or petting and scratching his favorite spot.

Once the dog starts to get the idea that you like it when he’s not so intent
on the cat, you can start finding things that he may be willing to like more
than the cat. Since most dogs are attracted to the cat because of the
chase, offer a much more fun chase game in the opposite direction. Call
the dog’s name in a happy voice and when he looks your way, be
bouncy and exciting and head away from the cat. When the dog starts
moving toward you start to praise him and find a toy for him to play with.
Even if the dog quickly looses interest in you and wants to head toward
the cat again, you’ve given the cat enough time to get away and you
have reinforced the dog for leaving the cat alone. All the dog wants is
some fun. If you provide that fun instead of scolding the dog for going
after the cat, he is more likely to choose you over the cat the next time
you call him.

What I’ve described above is my preferred method for getting a dog to
leave the cat alone. However, I recognize that while most dogs will
respond to this, they won’t necessarily all do it. If this is the case, or you
need something to use for a quick fix as you work on the above exercise,
there are some things that you can try.

One of the simplest things to do is just to scold the dog as he goes after
the cat. If your dog is very sensitive, a firm “ Fido, NO! Come” may be
enough to make your dog leave the cat alone. Most labs aren’t very
sensitive, though. In these cases you’ll need to set up some props.
Try to determine where you dog and cat interact the most. Place a squirt
bottle or good squirt gun filled with water and a little Listerine or vinegar
near the places where you dog meets the cat. If the dog ignores you,
spray him with the water solution. (For Labs I recommend adding a little
something to the water because most of them aren’t phased by plain
water. The smell of mouthwash or vinegar is unpleasant enough to act as
a mild punishment.)

If your dog is not terrified of sudden noises, you can also try a penny can.
Take an empty soda can and put about 10 pennies in it. Duct tape the
top of the can closed. If you try to call the dog off the cat and he doesn’t
respond to you, throw the can NEAR but not AT the dog. You don’t want
to hit him! And please, please don’t do this if it will terrify your noisesensitive
dog. We are not looking to traumatize the dog, just teach him
that it isn’t worth it to go after the cat.

Another way to use the penny can is to set the dog up. Have someone
hide with the can and let the dog and cat interact. If the dog goes after
the cat, let the can “ appear from nowhere” . You don’t want the dog to
see where the can comes from, so he learns that it isn’t ok to bother the
cat whether he’s alone or with humans. Remember, the goal is NOT to hit
the dog with the can; the goal is to startle him.

Regardless of what method you end up using, it will take some time. Keep
in mind that the dog is not only getting used to the idea of a cat in his
house, but also his new people, routine, and what these people expect of
him. It may take a month or more for things to settle into a somewhat
normal existence. Also remember not to tempt fate by allowing the cat
and dog to be together if you are not around to supervise. Sometimes
the best-behaved dogs can get too rough in play, which can result in
injury or worse. Crating the dog, or closing him in one area while the cat is
in another area is a wise safety precaution, even if you don’t feel it is
necessary.

krdahmer
September 20th, 2007, 12:19 PM
To be fair, in the OP, you asked for opinions not answers. What you got here are opinions, some feel very strongly about owners considering giving up a pet... so some posts are raw as all of us interpret things differently and add our own experiences into our opinions. Please don't take them as personal attacks, mine were definitely not meant that way. The bottom line is most of us would like to see you able to train your dogs and keep your cat, as uprooting a cat from it's home is always traumatic. But as I said you have to do what works for you and what YOU think is going to be best for your cat. And remember, if you ask for opinions on this board you are sure to get them... whether you like it or not. :rolleyes:;)

Love4himies
September 20th, 2007, 12:21 PM
i know Love4himies, im really not trying to be harsh, im just asking for some understanding and not judgment. the OP came here for alternatives to rehoming her cat, a plea for understanding and education. making her feel like a terrible person for the thought of rehoming this cat when that was the most well thought our alternative given the OP's knowledge.

when i came here, i had thoughts of rehoming Shadow because he didnt get along with Jeffrey. thankfully i got some suggestions to work with first before rehoming him. im glad i didnt get this kind of welcome when i came because i would have run screaming in the other direction. no one has any room to judge. we all do somethign wrong and to assume you have the right to JUDGE another human being is common but still not right.

which is not to say i dont judge... but i would hope someone would call me out on it if i did. :o :o :o


anyways, im not trying to be harmful, all of this here is because of love and compassion. ancientgirl didnt say what she said to torment the OP. she said it out of a love and compassion for cats, her reaction was based on her education and understanding that cats and dogs can coexist.

-ashley

I didn't think you were harsh at all, want4rain, just thought you misunderstood ancientgirl, that's all.

Ryanh, sorry you feel this way, I think when any controversial topic comes up such as breeding, rehoming, etc. a lot of emotions come to the surface. Many people on this forum have seen such blatant disreguard for a pet's well being by those who are suppose to be their guardians. I don't have a dog, but have learned so much just reading their replies to questions since I have been on this forum. I think they have so much experience and knowledge to share.

Ryanh
September 20th, 2007, 01:46 PM
To be fair, in the OP, you asked for opinions not answers. What you got here are opinions, some feel very strongly about owners considering giving up a pet... so some posts are raw as all of us interpret things differently and add our own experiences into our opinions. Please don't take them as personal attacks, mine were definitely not meant that way. The bottom line is most of us would like to see you able to train your dogs and keep your cat, as uprooting a cat from it's home is always traumatic. But as I said you have to do what works for you and what YOU think is going to be best for your cat. And remember, if you ask for opinions on this board you are sure to get them... whether you like it or not. :rolleyes:;)

I had no problem with what you said, in fact I found it helpfull.

Ryanh
September 20th, 2007, 01:56 PM
I can see that yes, there are many people out there that have a total disregard for pets, but keep in mind, I came to this forum, i joined and asked questions. The fact that I am even a member here should say to everyone that I care for my animals and want to do the best I can to give them a happy and healthy life. If i had little regard for my pets i wouldn't go to the trouble to get on my computer, search to find a good pet forum, register, research and post, that there speaks volumes.

want4rain
September 20th, 2007, 02:05 PM
I can see that yes, there are many people out there that have a total disregard for pets, but keep in mind, I came to this forum, i joined and asked questions. The fact that I am even a member here should say to everyone that I care for my animals and want to do the best I can to give them a happy and healthy life. If i had little regard for my pets i wouldn't go to the trouble to get on my computer, search to find a good pet forum, register, research and post, that there speaks volumes.

RAmen sistah! we should see this as an opportunity to convert this woman!! :D :laughing:

-ashley

CyberKitten
September 20th, 2007, 02:40 PM
I stand by what I said and if you take it as I think you are a bad person, I do not - just think you are unjustly accusing the cat. The animals are NOT equal - not when you allow the dog to chase a small kitty like that!

And re like comparing surgery to murder. As a pediatrician, this makes NO sense at all to me. Surgery to murder. What on earth does that mean????? It sounds like you are attacking the medical system and is a disturbingly flawed metaphor. And keep in mind my cats (as were my dogs) are like my children. If peple have a problem with that, too bad. They are worth it - I love them and would never hurt them., much less abandon them.

I do think this problem can be solved but you need to start over and reintroduce everyone and teach the dog to behave properly. The cats are just doing what they would naturally in the only home they know. I just know it can be worked around though!

want4rain
September 20th, 2007, 03:33 PM
As a pediatrician, this makes NO sense at all to me. Surgery to murder. What on earth does that mean????? It sounds like you are attacking the medical system and is a disturbingly flawed metaphor. And keep in mind my cats (as were my dogs) are like my children. If peple have a problem with that, too bad. They are worth it - I love them and would never hurt them., much less abandon them.

*blinks* im not sure what the medical field had to do with this.... :confused:

ancientgirl was comparing adopting a pet to adopting a child. if you view your pets in the same regard as a child, thats your decision but to expect others to do the same is unnatural.

my comparison was of surgery and murder. surgery is undesirable but acceptable in situations where there are no other options or the other options are far more stressful. murder on the other hand is totally unacceptable.

to adopt a kid and then change your mind is unacceptable. you do not make that choice to adopt and expect to take it back in a few months. a companion pet adoption on the other hand, there is always a chance things wont work out for them or for you, you are different species you know.

the OP in this case had a far preferable future for her cat (if this prove to be unfixable) than she did for her dogs. she stated she had a friend who was available to take her tom into her home with NO dogs. if she were to rehome the dog, he would go to a stranger.

in a world where anythign is possible, the OP came here asking WHAT WAS THE BEST IDEA and instead of people suggesting the best idea in an educating and understanding manner, they judged and scorned her questions on the situation... note i said questions and not actions or or decisions. there were no decisions made nor any actions taken. just quesitons asked.

no one judges you wrongly for your love for your pets.... but you are judging others for not sharing your views.

bottom line is the OP doesnt want to give up her tom, she wants to find a solution to the situation. hopefully she hasnt been chased off because this is a really great place to get advice.

-ashley

want4rain
September 20th, 2007, 03:35 PM
also let me say, im not trying to make anythign out of the medical field, social services, those who have adopted, those who were adopted nor those who love their dogs/cats as much as children. i am not trying to attack anyone. least of all the above mentioned people. if you feel offended and you arent listed above... dont. i didnt mean to.

-ashley

Ryanh
September 20th, 2007, 03:52 PM
thanks again ashley.


and for the record you can change the 'her' to him :D

-Ryan

want4rain
September 20th, 2007, 04:39 PM
heh sorry!! i had a sneaking suspicion you were a guy.

-ash

krdahmer
September 20th, 2007, 04:57 PM
Ya a Ryan usually is male.... and welcome, men seem to be in a vast minority around here!!


And as for all this children's importance vs. pets stuff, I have to weigh in. I think for anyone to value a child's life over a pet's is wrong... and it is always wrong to adopt and assume responsibility for another life and then back out, pets and children alike. IMO (have to stress this is all my OPINION). I think all life is equal and deserves equal consideration in all matters. And in my make believe perfect world everyone would respect that and all living creatures, and take these responsibilities seriously weighing all consequences before a commitment of such magnitude. But as I said in the real world many don't.... and it is the pets and children that suffer for it. Society, our parents and role models and history have always (in most cases) put pets and animals on a lesser plain than humans, which is so wrong to me (and you can see the consequences of that play out in extremes with serial killers and rapists, etc starting out hurting animals). They have as much right to life and safety and health and happiness as we do. In fact God will judge us and value us by exactly how we chose to treat those 'lesser', the meek. And I think it is fitting that in the bible he created those creatures first. I think society would be much stronger and safer if everyone treated other living things the way they expect to be treated. And I think the more parents that teach their children the value and beauty and wonder of life, all life, the brighter a future this planet would have. As it looks now, on TV, in the news, this whole planet is in big trouble and it's future pretty grim.