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Girl rant....Boys beware!

Mocha's mum
April 16th, 2007, 08:58 PM
So, I love having two X, I was "Super Mega B***h" at work. I don't understand this hormone thing.......grrrrrr.....:yell:

I got my first "real" monthly visitor today (I had an IUD for 17 months, and didn't really have anything)....I forgot how pleasant it is...:frustrated:

So, does anyone out there of the female persuasion have any suggestions for dealing with the mood swings?? I never had them before until now...just used to bloat up and cramp like crazy. I feel like taking a hostage....

April 16th, 2007, 09:04 PM
wish i could offer some advice but i'm in the same boat. I was on the pill for 10 years...i went off about 6 months ago. All my regular hormones have come back and are driving me nuts. I can actually feel the different parts of my cycle (ups/lows). Its weird for me. Half of the month i'm all sex crazed and want babies, the other half I could care less about men.

April 16th, 2007, 09:07 PM
Really, that bad?

Maybe you should see your doctor then, you might have that PMS syndrome thingy magigy. :shrug: PMD I think maybe it's called.

I'm not in the same boat, but am having 'female problems' too. I didn't take my pill for two days while I was sick so guess who came to visit mid month... and has yet to go home. :frustrated:

April 16th, 2007, 09:19 PM
AGAIN with the "P" word.......i swear its hunting me:D

April 16th, 2007, 09:22 PM
AGAIN with the "P" word.......i swear its hunting me:D

What "pill"? Cuz nobody said the other "P" word. :p

April 16th, 2007, 09:28 PM
Well be sure to use painkillers if you need them and if they don't work keep looking till you find one. I used to just try and go without and wow what a difference it makes to get rid of the pain. I make sure I start it right at the first sign though or i'm in big trouble and nothing works. Ginger is really good for that time of month too, I find because it helps with the bloating and can just make the whole thing go faster. I make the tea from the fresh root you get at the grocery store.

I don't know about doctors. I just finished with a gyno that didn't do anything except give me more to get angry at.:evil: Tons of blood tests, scans, pills that didn't work. If someone has had better luck with one i'd like to hear about it.

Large supply of dark chocolate.:thumbs up

Mocha's mum
April 16th, 2007, 10:11 PM
Mmmmm....chocolate! I just had a peanut butter cup....:D

I think men should have to go through what we do! I've never felt so crummy like I said before, I used to get the cramping and bloating. So, I wouldn't eat salty stuff, I'd drink lots of water just before my period and I'd take naproxen for the cramps. And I was fine with it, I dealt with what I had to, and it was relatively "pain free".

Then, last Christmas, I heard all of these great things about the Mirena IUD. So, I thought "right on" and had it put in. I suffered through 17 months of unpredictable spotting and intense cramping. I decided I wanted it out, so I went back on the pill for three months, and had it out on Friday. Yesterday I started spotting a bit, and then this morning...WHAM! Yikes!!

Maybe it's the hormone of the IUD (it's got a hormone in it) working it's way out of my system. Or maybe it's my uterus saying "Ha ha! You shut me off for 17 months, now you're going to pay!!" :shrug:

Does anyone get insanely tired as well? Or is this some other wierd symptom I should see a doctor about?? Uggghhhh. If I'm not stressed out over Mocha, I worry about myself (unfortunately, I have just enough medical training that I "self diagnose" all the time, and work myself into a tizzy!! :laughing: )....

April 16th, 2007, 10:29 PM
Vitamin B12. i hear it works wonders! cut down on caffeine (i know that one sux but its got something to do with water retention or something) and salt.

**Research has proven that you can reduce up to almost half of all symptoms (including mood swings, depression, and menstrual cramps) of PMS by simply consuming 1200 mg of calcium daily**
also excercise. ( i know the last thing one feels like doing but apparently it helps. im one of those annoying women who get very few pms symptoms so this is all from what i read!!!)

i just went off the pill too. hehe. still waiting (and i cant even say 'in anticipation' here) to see what results that has. cant say im sorry though. i hate having those extra hormones in my body. have we not got enough of them as it is? i have to say though, that i was on the progesterone only one and it was pretty good. got nightmare sore boobs a week before (lol my girlfriends would laugh at me walking up the stairs or down the stairs with arm support round my top front to stop the movement and pain!) but that is the only side effect i got. find my body normally a lot better off them!!!!

April 16th, 2007, 10:52 PM
I'm on the Depo shot and unfortunately will be going off it soon. I don't really have a reason to be on it and I just wanted on it so I didn't have to worry about a pill everyday with my life being all over the place the last few months.

I find that I get much more tired and sleepy around that time. I think for me it has to do with the amount of blood and all. Its like it saps my system dry. *shrugs* I think its supposed to be normal within reason.

I'd say give it another few months before you panic since you've been on some sort of hormone therapy for a while now. *shrugs* That's what I've been told going on stuff so why shouldn't it work getting off stuff too?

Painkillers were my friend.


p.s. now I want chocolate....again....

April 16th, 2007, 10:59 PM
sorry to hear your "time of the month" problems

I have no advice...i'm on no pills and my period is short and i barely get cramps. THis is another reason why i'm against birth totally messes up your body :frustrated:

Rolandsmom....geez! who wants to EXERCISE when it's that time of the month?!? lol GRRR!:evil:

and ladies....don't you just love tampon/pad commercials?? I mean everybody's so darn happy to be on their periods .....wonderful time! I wish everyday could be like that :frustrated: :rolleyes: don';t you??:laughing: :laughing:

April 16th, 2007, 11:03 PM
Hmm my mom was the opposite, when she was on the pill she would get mad at the stupidest things and I mean get crazy mad. Once the pill was out of her system she was an entire different person....thank god she decided to have my brother.

I only did the pill thing for a little while and stopped as it made me really depressed all the time.

When I started my period at 13 until the age of 28 I had mega cramps(they kind you pass out from) from day one almost till the end. Docotor didn't know why but gave me arthritis pills and they worked wonders for a few years, then my system became immune to them. For me tylenol and those playtex adhesive heat strips(playtex heat therapy) work wonders for cramps and the strips last almost all day ( I think most drug stores carry them in the "femmine" section). I tried the exercise thing and always ended up in the fetal position asleep on the floor, but they do say the more active you are in general is suppose to lessen cramps, flow and the ups and downs, and to stay away from caffine, sugar and salt...yeah but that's when I crave it the most.

Ohh how I wish our belly button was actually a special menstral button and you only pushed it when you needed to, to have that one period pryor to trying to have a baby(just to flush the system) yes I am weird.

For the times I do get those ups and downs I do things that make me feel good/cozy/comforted. Pleanty of rest, curl up on the couch with a movie or a nice long hot bath with some scented candles and of course the door locked and maybe some ear plugs so you don't have to listen to the cat's you so dearly love yelling at you through the door.

April 16th, 2007, 11:05 PM
lalalalalala i can't here you....and i have been blindfolded..........:D

April 16th, 2007, 11:06 PM
Tampon and pad commercials make me want to throw up :yuck: Oh it's such a wonderful thing...lets celebrate...darn I have to wait a whole month for the next one...arrg give me a break.

April 16th, 2007, 11:43 PM
Does anyone get insanely tired as well?Ya usually a couple of days before and sometimes its like one whole day where it doesn't matter how much rest I've had theres an almost heavy with hormone feeling and all i'm good for is sleep. Thank goodness for the Naproxen though, just started that a few months ago. I'm not on or coming off any hormones though just naturally messed up.:rolleyes:

I haven't seen any improvement with RolandsMom's suggestions either(even stopped drinking coffee and tea) but I keep up very mild exercise and the calcium and B-vitamins btw calcium is actually known to cause muscle cramping so you are supposed to take it with magnesium. Exercise can make things worse if you have low iron which I do so I think thats why it seemed to make things worse for me.:sad:

Looks like other people are having the same reaction to Mirena, maybe it just takes a while to "re-set" the hormones. Some comments about it on another forum here:

I'd keep up with chocolate.:)

dustybird, I basically pass out too, its almost like sometimes I hope they will be just bad enough to knock me out because if they aren't I have to stay awake in pain. I'll have to try the other stuff you mentioned.

April 17th, 2007, 12:05 AM
For cramps heat has always been a lifesaver for me but you can't walk around with a heating pad all day. So I was soooo excited when those heat therapy strips came out. If you can't find those any of the other adheasive heat strips(in the muscle pain section of the store) work well to. I can't count the number of times I burned myself with the heating pad at night, either get a small burn or a sleepless painfull night, and those magic bags don't stay warm long enough. Cold therapy works for some people but just makes things worse for me. They say midol is new and improved nowadays to help with cramps and the ups and downs but alass they don't do a thing for me.

There are all sorts of herbal stuff now at the drugstore but I haven't had much luck with them and everything is just so expensive.

April 17th, 2007, 12:33 AM
lalalalalala i can't here you....and i have been blindfolded..........:D

Wayne, you need this smiley for times like this:

April 17th, 2007, 12:43 AM
hehe glad to hear that I'm not the only one with weird menstruel cycles around here. i still get all the pms every month (haven't had the nasty P for 8 months now) and annoy the crap out of everyone with it, but no P for me.

and yes those people in the commercials annoy the crap out of me, even when i get spotting i'm not happy, let alone a whole P!

and i too get tired right before and during. I could sleep for 20 hours straight, but life doesn't allow that.

April 17th, 2007, 06:05 AM
I've heard taking extra calcium about a week before you are supposed to start should help. And definetly chocolate makes it much much better. Perhaps a doctor visit is in order too. Good luck!

marsupial mama
April 17th, 2007, 06:44 AM
Raspberry leaf tea helps me with the PMS side of things. Don't take it if you are trying to get preggo though, because it can stimulate uterine contractions when you least want them.

I think gentle exercise, like walking, could be helpful. Or swimming until Aunt Flo comes along...

April 17th, 2007, 08:18 AM
I have no advice...i'm on no pills and my period is short and i barely get cramps. THis is another reason why i'm against birth totally messes up your body :frustrated:

I'm not really into the birth control pill too, because for me, I find the pill makes me depressed, severely depressed. I can't stand them. I'm so moody when I take them my hubby and I were actually having problems with each other because I was so moody, (ok I admit, I was being a b****). Oh, and did I mention weight gain. Ugh! Hate the pill, just doesn't work for my body.

So for me, when I got off of the pill, it was nice, I was able to control my emotions, and yeah, I get grumpy sometimes before my period, but after I got all of the medication out of my system, it was only for a brief pre-MS. Then after all the bloating is gone, I'm fine again.

Nothing you put in your body should ever make you feel that crappy.

Try going to bed earlier, I find that I need the extra sleep when it's that time, I pretty much just crash, I sleep a lot when I'm PMSing, and when I wake up when it's over, I feel great, rested too.

April 17th, 2007, 08:25 AM
Wdawson is so brave for coming in, even though there was a warning sign, and then, dunh dunh dunh returning.:eek:

Just had to give you props for that.:highfive:

April 17th, 2007, 08:40 AM
AGAIN with the "P" word.......i swear its hunting me:D

Isn't this forum ohhh soooo educational:D You learn all kinds of things, even things you don't even want to learn about!!!

As for the P thing....I hate it!!:mad: I was thinking of trying that IUD that stops it, and you can keep it in for 5 years or more! But I heard it's really painfull to have ...ummm......installed.

Loves Labs
April 17th, 2007, 09:28 AM
I am very much against the pill as of recently.

Around Christmas I noticed my belly getting bigger - I thought hurray! I am gaining weight? :frustrated: Pregnant? :rolleyes: Nope, I had a tumour (non-cancerous we later found out) the size of grapefruit in my uterus - which explained the mind-numbing cramps I had been having. I would also get SO tired - turned out to be guys should check into your iron levels if you are experiencing that.

Anyways, I was immediately taken off the pill and then they started inducing menopause with a monthly injection (big needle into my belly) that they use for menopausal women and some forms of cancer. Well, it has started to shrink (by a few cm so far :shrug: )....anyways, since being off the pill I noticed I felt SO much better, less moody, etc. etc. So I have become a HUGE advocate for not using the pill.

Now as for the menopause symptoms (I am 25)....these I could live without...:eek: Just another month though and then we reassess...

April 17th, 2007, 10:17 AM
Awww thats awful.:sad: :grouphug: Glad it wasn't cancer. The warnings on the boxes for the pills really scares me everytime I look. I have some never started because it said stuff like "not likely to happen but you could develop a liver tumor" "Blood clots in your legs etc.. So scary. Really sorry to hear about that Love Labs, I'd be so angry if I were you. I hope it hurrys up shrinking.:fingerscr :fingerscr :fingerscr

Loves Labs
April 17th, 2007, 11:07 AM
Thanks Maya, we are praying it shrinks too...otherwise that means they will most likely have to remove the uterus too...since it is so large and would be very difficult to remove alone. That would mean no kids :sad:

The only positive side - I made my man promise we could get as many dogs as I wanted if that worse case scenario happens...:o

Yup, something to be said for pumping all those hormones into your just can't be good for you...

April 17th, 2007, 11:17 AM
to remove the uterus too...since it is so large and would be very difficult to remove alone. That would mean no kids :sad:

I could give you mine, I don't need it :D

April 17th, 2007, 12:07 PM
Mocha's mum, I have your solution right here:

April 17th, 2007, 12:50 PM
I really hate the Pill. Ok, it is convenient and no worries about getting pregnant really, but the side-effects for me were pretty bad on most of the different ones I tried. The last one I liked until I realized the side-effects had crept up on me over the years and eventually became unbearable (motion sickness, dizzyness, feeling sick all the time.. I still have a bottle of Dramamine in my purse!, plus other issue on top of that, i could go on and on but will stop now). Last but not least, I have four female acquaintences and friends who were on the pill and had STROKES. I threw the pack away last July mid-pack and swore never to have artificial hormones controlling my cycles again. I am just now starting to feel 'back to normal'. I have always had mood swings, tiredness, cramping with periods. It does help some to take B-vitamins (which incidently are depleted in your body if you are taking hormones for birth control), calcium, drink lots of fluids and get some exercise. If you have cramps, take advil (ibuprofin) and start several days before you expect to get your period (if you know what that is!), it will inhibit the production of prostaglandins that cause the cramping. There are some herbal types of remedies, but I haven't tried too many of those. Also, I know there are dietary recommendations but I don't remember what they are right off hand. I didn't read all the posts so maybe someone mentioned what to eat in there (ok, i noticed chocolate!!). Good luck!

Mocha's mum
April 17th, 2007, 10:23 PM
:laughing: Look what I started!! :laughing:

But seriously though...I'm going to try EVERYTHING!! I just feel so bad that I snapped at a lot of people yesterday. I feel better today though...'re a brave, brave, brave person to tread these treacherous waters....:laughing:

I love that milk commercial!! :laughing: I'm sure that's how Kris has been feeling lately!

Loves Labs, I would gladly donate my uterus to you, if need be - what's your blood type??!! :crazy:

Happycats, don't do the IUD unless you've had some babies. The insertion was excruciating (some girls I know said it's not too bad though, depends on the doc I guess), and the cramping (we're assuming) was because my uterus hasn't been 'stretched' due to pregnancy :rolleyes:

Thanks for all of the info ladies...and gentleman!! :laughing: I'm glad there's somewhere I can b***h and complain and ask for advice (my mom's in Mexico right now) without getting the "eeeeewwwwwwww. Baby I don't want to hear about that!"

April 18th, 2007, 12:43 AM
Yeah, I would have stopped the pill (actually the patch) a while ago, but knowing my genes, I'm likely to be very fertile. So until I can get my tubes tied, I don't have much choice. But no doubt, I have to get off it sooner than later.

:grouphug: for the mood swings... I have a post-it with "Hug the Bear" written on it and I bring it out every now and then to remind my man.;)

What bugs me is how the pill is equated with women's lib.. :offtopic: :D Women's lib, my hiney. Women's lib would be the MEN pumping themselves with anti-sperm hormones. :evil:

April 18th, 2007, 02:40 AM
Women's lib would be the MEN pumping themselves with anti-sperm hormones. :evil: Yup, so true.

The only thing liberating about the pill is having some control over our own reproductive system. Wouldn't some men be responsible enough to take a pill if it was safer than the female version? (its not too off topic) :)

April 18th, 2007, 02:41 AM
Yeah, they'd never forget- they'd have us nagging them all the time. :D

April 18th, 2007, 12:36 PM
My sister found this on the internet. It supposed to be an actual letter that was sent to this company.:D


Dear Mr. Thatcher,

I have been a loyal user of your Always maxi pads for over 20 years,
and I appreciate many of their features. Why, without the Leak Guard
Core or Dri-Weave absorbency, I'd probably never go horseback riding or
salsa dancing, and I'd certainly steer clear of running up and down
the beach in tight, white shorts. But my favorite feature has to be
your revolutionary Flexi-Wings. Kudos on being the only company
smart enough to realize how crucial it is that maxi-pads be
aerodynamic. I can't tell you how safe and secure I feel each month
knowing there's a little F-16 in my pants.

Have you ever had a menstrual period, Mr. Thatcher? Ever suffered from
"the curse"? I'm guessing you haven't. Well, my "time of the month" is
starting right now. As I type, I can already feel hormonal
forces violently surging through my body. Just a few minutes from now,
my body will adjust and I'll be transformed into what my husband likes
to call "an inbred hillbilly with knife skills." Isn't the human
body amazing? As brand manager in the feminine-hygiene division, you've
no doubt seen quite a bit of research on what exactly happens during
your customers' monthly visits from Aunt Flo.

Therefore, you must know about the bloating, puffiness, and cramping
we endure, and about our intense mood swings, crying jags, and
out-of-control behavior. You surely realize it's a tough time for most
women. In fact, only last week, my friend Jennifer fought the violent
urge to shove her boyfriend's testicles into a George Foreman Grill
just because he told her he thought Grey's Anatomy was written by
drunken chimps. Crazy!

The point is, sir, you of all people must realize that America is
just crawling with homicidal maniacs in Capri pants. Which brings me to
the reason for my letter.

Last month, while in the throes of cramping so painful I wanted
to reach inside my body and yank out my uterus, I opened an Always maxi
pad, and there, printed on the adhesive backing, were these words:
"Have a Happy Period."

Are you flipping kidding me?

What I mean is, does any part of your tiny middle-manager
brain really think happiness - actual smiling, laughing happiness - is
possible during a menstrual period? Did anything mentioned above sound
the least bit pleasurable? Well, did it, James? FYI, unless you're some
kind of sick S&M freak girl, there will never be anything "happy" about
a day in which you have to jack yourself up on Motrin and Kahlua and
lock yourself in your house just so you don't march down to the local
Walgreen's armed with a hunting rifle and a sketchy plan to end your
life in a blaze of glory.

For the love of God, pull your head out, man. If you just have to slap
a moronic message on a maxi pad, wouldn't it make more sense to say
something that's actually pertinent, like "Put Down the Hammer" or
"Vehicular Manslaughter Is Wrong"? Or are you just picking on us?

Sir, please inform your accounting department that,
effective immediately, there will be an $8 drop in monthly profits, for
I have chosen to take my maxi-pad business elsewhere. And though I
will certainly miss your Flexi-Wings, I will not for one minute miss
your brand of condescending !@#%. And that's a promise I will keep.

April 18th, 2007, 01:31 PM

I've been happily period free since october (pregnant). Not sure which is worse (haha).

When I was younger, I used to pass out EVERY cycle. (once in front of a high school class... my most embarassing moment I think) ...That's why I went on the pill (not as b.c. but to reduce the pain and heaviness). It was an amazing difference for me.

Naproxin (American Aleve) is amazing. I always get people to bring it back over the border for me when they go to the states. It's the only thing that works on the cramps I get. (and they're 100% better than what I used to have).

Luckily I am not one to get mood swings, so I have no help with that!

April 18th, 2007, 01:45 PM
LOL - me too! been happily preggo since January. but before that I really liked Natural Progesterone Cream and percocets. The cream is best if you can have it specially made for you at a compounding pharmacy. It's described nicely in the book "what your doctor may NOT tell you about menopause" by Dr. John Lee. it's a great read for anyone who would like to understand hormones a bit better. it actually works to level you out. I was in a great mood more often than not when using the cream regularly.

the perc's... well, that's all I found that worked for my kill-me-now-cramps.

for the techno-ladies... the ipad skit:

April 18th, 2007, 04:06 PM
Not to steal the thread or anything but is anyone else complety irregular? I have never had a normal period. I will skip a month or two or it seems like I just finished and it's back. I've been to the docotor and they have never found anything. The pill never helped either. I have also finaly gotten over the oh crap am I preggo everytime I miss one.

Love the letter by the way, I woke up from a nap today to the words "Have A Happy Period", needless to say I shouted some foul words back at the T.V(woke up at 3am to some lovely cramps) and would like to wash the actress who say's those dredded words mouth out with soap.:evil:

April 18th, 2007, 05:30 PM
hehe i loved the letter, it was awesome, wish i hd thought of writhing something like that when i actually had a period.

dustybird: if you read the above posts it seems like NOONE here seems to have a regular period. I'm thinking a regular period is something of a myth:D

April 18th, 2007, 06:04 PM
Not to steal the thread or anything but is anyone else complety irregular?Ya I have no idea what is going on. I swell up like three or four bra sizes and i'll be like that for a week thinking any day now but nope twoo three weeks will pass finally i'll get it and it will be really light like what the point was all that for.:confused: Now i'll stay swollen like that totally bloated till the next time round and then shed a bunch of water the following month, b/f will comment that I look deflated, different everytime heavy almost not there I never know. will even start then stop for two or three days a week then start again. Apparantly everything is fine scans, blood work etc.

Mocha's mum
April 18th, 2007, 07:20 PM
I used to be really irregular (pain in the butt when you're in the military and have to go to the field...) so that's why I went on the pill. I have no intentions of having kids (of the non-furry kind), and neither does Kris - but they won't "fix" me; too young, no kids, nothing wrong with me, blah blah blah. Doc won't even do Kris :frustrated: I know it's probably unhealthy, but I like the fact that I can manipulate my flow - read previous statement about the military. And that's why I thought the IUD would be great - no periods, no hassles for five years....HA!

At any rate, I started taking Evening Primrose Oil and Vitamin B6 today. I feel more like myself today (I know it's not the vitamins just yet), so I'm hoping this is just the Mirena hormones wearing out of system.

And for the record - I want to beat the person that came up with that stupid "have a happy period" bulls**t. And that's NOT the hormones talking this time!! :laughing:

April 19th, 2007, 12:42 AM
We should start a "we will not have a happy period" campaign(spell). Since we all seem to feel the same way about those stupid commercials.

I almost got an IUD once but my doc couldn't get it in. Later I read up on it and didn't like what some of the side effects could be, was years ago so maybe they are better now.

Don't give up I decided at 21 that I didn't want kids and came up with a nice little speach for my doctor complete with back up remarks to make my case. She talked with me for about an hour and then agreed that I seemed to know what I wanted and after searching for a little while she found a gyno to do the procedure. Met with him, another exam and he finaly agreed to do the tubal occlusion. What I don't understand is that a vasectomy is reversable, so why they won't do that is just stupid and you have to pay for a reversal now so what difference does it make to them. Plus they could have you sign something so you don't sue saying you were miss led to beleave(god can't spell tonight) a tubal would be 100% reversable, it's 50/50 with those ok more like 20/80. If your an adult you should know what you want. Would they rather you had a kid you didn't want and give it a crap life because you resented it or have an abortion. I said if I really felt the need to be a mother to another human being one day and the procedure didn't work I could adopt, foster etc... Besides there are enough teenagers haveing babies for us all.

Most of the gyno's said they wouldn't talk to me about it until I was 25. I will be 32 this summer and have yet to regret my decision(had it done at 21). I don't dislike kids or had a crappy childhood, just not for me. Congrat's btw to those of you that are expecting.

If you do find someone who is willing to discuss it with you they ask some of the dumbest questions.

April 19th, 2007, 08:42 AM
Hey dustybird, this is not so :offtopic: , just a question, did you have any hormonal side effects from the tubal?

I already have three kids, and I want to get one, a tubal, I can't stand all this nonsense with bc, but have wanted to ask someone who actually got it done if they were feeling any worse or better after the procedure.

Never mind the doctors about the visectomy, I've already tried talking my hubby into it, lol, he thought I was nuts, but he's very nervous around doctors, so really I don't blame him... too much. But if we get preggo before the procedure, I will have to blame him:laughing:

April 19th, 2007, 11:20 AM
papillonmama, I have not had any side effects at all that I know of. They don't remove anything so you really shouldn't feel any different. All they do is go in with a scope and put some clips on your tubes so nothing can pass through them, or they cut the tubes and clip or I think cautaurize(sp) the ends. You still have your ovaries so nothing hormonal will change. I think they mostly do the clips now(tubal occlusion), the tissue under the clips die so they say.

It's a day procedure done with a scope(your asleep) and they pump your abdomen with gas so your little tubies float(see/work with them better). With me they went in just below my belly button and just above the pubic bone and you can't tell unless your looking for it. My body doesn't do scars well so they tend to be noticeable and I can hardly see it. I think the worst part for me was getting the anaesthesia and the float gas(whatever its called) out of my system. I'd be awake and then boom asleep again, you do feel a little crampy but I think it only lasted like a day.

I really don't feel any different now then before I had it done....just don't have to worry about babies anymore.

April 19th, 2007, 12:55 PM
Thanks dustybird, that's exactly what I wanted to know.:)

Mocha's mum
April 19th, 2007, 08:07 PM
dustybird, what did you say to the docs to get them to do the tubal?? Seriously. I'm 27, Kris is 36 and neither of us wants babies. But, no matter what I say or how nicely I ask....the answer is always "no". It's frustrating. I'll sign a waiver or give up an organ or whatever!! :laughing: Just do it!!!

The way I see it is, I'm an adult, I know what I want. If I change my mind in the future, well, I'll have to suck it up buttercup. Lots of kids (as well as pets) are looking for homes. :shrug:

April 19th, 2007, 08:46 PM
Interesting, I didn't know doctors were so reluctant to do this. I think that might be a throwback from when it was done to people without thier consent. Like institutionalized people, "challenged" people etc..and then they of course had to stop doing that. It should always be the individuals right either way. I'm kind of surprised they actually say no. I guess they figure if you are serious enough you'll eventually find someone to do it. And ya its not like we don't have enough unwanted children being born everyday, seems like a pretty responsible choice.:shrug: I mean if you said I want to get pregnant they don't say NO.:confused:

April 19th, 2007, 09:44 PM
dustybird: if you read the above posts it seems like NOONE here seems to have a regular period. I'm thinking a regular period is something of a myth:D

I can tell you mine starts on a Wenesday around 1:00 pm. :o But yes, I'm on the pill and I love it. I don't get any pms pain. And every summer, instead of taking the sugar ones , I just start a new box of pill, ( i like to swim a lot ) as long as you do this , you don't get your period. Been doing this for 4-5 years now. There is not health concern doing this.

April 19th, 2007, 10:57 PM
I'm surprised that by 27 they still won't do it. I don't remember exactly what I said but lets see.

-as far as I am concerned haveing kids is a life long commitment and it is not one I am willing to make.

-I don't dislike kids but being a parent is not for me.

-have a hard enough time taking care of myself and can't imagine haveing to take care of someone else every hour of everyday for at least 18yrs.

-the lifestyle I want doesn't leave the kind of room/life/atmosphere that I feel would be good for a child to be raised in(clarify as you don't want them thinking your a drug kingpin or something)

-I grew up in a loving household and have cared for many children of all ages from 3 days to 12yrs, at times for more than just a few hours not just while thier parents went out to dinner, so I feel I have a good idea as to what is involved in raising a child. While it was fine for a few hours or days it is not something I want or feel I could handle on a daily basis for at least 18? years.

-have tried many different birth control pills all of which left me feeling very depressed all the time and that is no way to live.

-am allergic to latex condoms, while there are condoms made of natural materials they are not 100% effective. Continue to list off many other types of birth control and the side effects or even lie and say you tried some and they were not for you...for ? reasons.

-would they prefer that you show up in their office one day to have an abortion, as you feel that strongly about not wanting children(whether you would or not doesn't really matter, they don't need to know)

-should you have a child you never wanted by mistake and then end up resenting it or giving him/her a crappy life ( could be worded better)

-you could even say that you find that you are a rather selfish person, easily irritated or something like that and how that wouldn't be a good environment for a child to be raised in. I never said anything like that but I guess in a way it makes it look like you are looking out for that child that you never plan to have.

-if sometime in your life years from now you all of sudden felt like you wanted/needed to be a parent there is always foster, adoption or volunteering with kids(of course saying that may make them think there is a small part of you that does want to have kids). As they and everyone well know's there are pleanty of unwanted children in the world.

-would they want(or want you) to risk contributing to the unwanted/neglected children of the world(almost sounds like the unwanted pet overpopulation problem)

-sure you could refrain from ever haveing sex but sex is an important part of a healthy relationship between a husband and wife or any serious relationship etc..(why it's important etc...)

-you understand how the procedure works and that it is not 100% reversable, you are an adult and feel that you are being responsible in your decision.

-they asked if I was afraid of being pregnant, of getting fat and of child birth. I said no I wasn't and the above list has nothing to do with my decision, I just simply don't want the responsibilties(how many times can you tell them you know haveing a child is a huge resposiblity and you know it's not one you want or could handle, really I think that alone is a good enough reason for them to do it) that come with haveing a child. Unlike some people I don't get all warm and fuzzy when I see babies; sure they're cute but I still don't get "that" feeling that a lot of woman do.

I didn't end up haveing to really go into too much detail as to why I wanted it I thought I would. I think I just basicly ended up saying that it was a commitment/responsibility I didn't want to make/could handle, felt that I was being responsible by making such a decision. I did mention all the problems I was haveing with birth control and maybe because my gyno was also a sex therapist it made a difference with him. Your an adult, it's your body, know one know's you better than you do and deep down inside you know and have always known that haveing children is not something you want for yourself. I don't think I would have been a bad mother but I know myself well enough to know how I would feel at the end of the day, the stress, being tired all the time, short fuse becasue I just want to be left alone for 5min and flying off the handle because while I still exsist it becomes all about trying to raise a happy, healthy well adjusted child/'s something I just would not be able to handle long term. Some people thrive on that... they love taking care of other's. I like/love taking care of my pets but it certainly isn't the same thing as taking care of a child.

Well I have written a book now and rambled some here and there. I suppose you could just simply say you hated children and why(although I can't really see hateing them, they're great as long as they aren't mine). I can't count the number of headaches I had after babysitting some days, nights, weeks. I suppose a lot of it was becasue they weren't mine so I was always worried something bad would happen while I simply went pee, but if I got that stressed so to speak about someone elses child how stressed would I get if it was mine...I really think I would end up going crazy(ok crazier than I already am) Ask them why they care or what difference it makes to them if one day you were to regret your decision, you can't really sue them.They simply have to educate you on what kind of decision you are makeing and then wash their hands of it.
I just don't get why it's such a big deal to them, it's your life and your body and really has no effect on them what so ever. It's not like they are making a decision to pull the plug on a life support machine and then they have to live with never knowing if they made the right decision or not since the tubal isn't their decsion it's yours.

I don't know if any of this was helpful or not and maybe other's can think of better ways of wording some things or add some things that may help. It just seems like most of the Doc's are just bull headed about it. My reg. doc did tell me that most doc's would only consider talking to me about it at 25(they will deliver a baby from a 16yr old mother but not help a 25 yr old woman not have one), and only talk not do it. Out of all the gyno's in London she only found 2 that would talk to me at 21 and sent me to the one she thought I'd have the best chance with. Now I didn't like him, he was weird and I will never go to him again but I am grateful that he did it for me.

Have you even had the chance to discuss it with someone other than your regular doctor? I don't know if you need referrals to see a gyno or not, if you don't I would just start calling them all. I wish you luck in finding/convincing someone to do it. I know I am glad I did it, I am by no means an addict:o or anything but it is nice not to have to worry about getting pregnant or to have to deal with all the side effects from birth control.

Sorry it was soo long and if it is confusing at all, I also hope I didn't offend anyone. Again I don't dislike children.

April 20th, 2007, 01:30 AM
Not to steal the thread or anything but is anyone else complety irregular?

Yep, I'm totally regular. Every 26 days :frustrated:, which means I get one extra "visit" a year compared to the 28 day cycles :mad: . The only good news is as I am getting older it is a shorter period, now only 3-4 days instead of 5-6 :thumbs up .

Have only missed 2 periods my entire life, both due to extreme stress.

Mocha's mum
April 20th, 2007, 08:16 PM
Thanks dustybird!! I'm just so frustrated being told by other people how I feel or what I want. IMO, I'm old enough to make decisions that will directly impact nobody's life but my own. I'm going to bring these points up at my next appointment. I don't think I should feel like I need to ask permission all the time...

I just see my regular doc, because that's the first step, if I'm not mistaken. They have to refer you to the surgeon, or whatever. But all I've ever been told is "no no no" and it's really irritating me.

April 20th, 2007, 08:51 PM
But all I've ever been told is "no no no" and it's really irritating me.

They will only do it if you have related health problem , I have a coworker that did have a LOT of problems because of it. It took a lot of time for a doc to finally agree, she is still having problems. :shrug:

But yes, it is our body and they should do it if we ask them too. Heck they do it for men, no questions asked.

April 21st, 2007, 07:54 AM
For those having trouble with their regular doctors you could ask them to send you to a women's health clinic or a birth control clinic. They tend to be more open minded, and I really think they understand that it's your body, and even if they don't want to do the surgery, they can refer you to someone who would be more willing.

April 21st, 2007, 01:37 PM
From what I understand it is gyno's that do the procedure, it's who I went to, to have mine done as well as my mom when she had it done. A womens health clinic sounds like a good place to try or even just call all the gyno's in the phone book. A doctor isn't suppose to deny you any care so pester, pester, pester until they refer you if that is what is needed to see someone. Eventually they should refer you, even if its just to shut you up.

Mocha's mum
April 21st, 2007, 04:56 PM
Ah, tbat's more my speed - annoy the heck out of someone until I get what I want!! :laughing:

At any rate, I started taking Evening Primrose Oil and vitamin B6 last week. A friend of mine says it takes a few weeks to kick in, but it's helping her PMS. As long as I don't lose my marbles and chase some officer down the hall with my big stick!! :laughing:

April 22nd, 2007, 01:10 AM
well ladies I blame you! :frustrated:(jk) yup all this P talk and after eight months of not having one, aunt flo paid a visit today:frustrated:

so now i get to have a "happy period" hehe this is sooo ridiculous. I think it's hilarious that the minute I have my health card and am all set up to go get checked out, aunt flo comes. geez i'm weird.:shrug:

April 22nd, 2007, 02:06 AM
I've stayed out of this thread because, frankly, it's been awhile since birth control and periods have been a problem. I was always irregular, always very light, sometimes skipping, and can count on one hand how many times I had cramps. When I was on the pill, I would sometimes skip several months. After 8 years, we ran out of excuses not to have a baby and realized we were happy the way we were and didn't want one. We were married young, so we were aged 27 and 30 when we tried to find a doctor that would do a vasectomy. We did find one. I had to sign a statement saying it was "to protect my life and health". My hubby had no problem doing it. It's much easier for men. He went trap-shooting afterwards. My maternal instincts are satisfied by my pets and we've never regretted it. You don't miss what you've never had. I do like kids, but for a short time only and then I want to give them back and enjoy my lifestyle.

April 22nd, 2007, 02:25 PM
I had to sign a statement saying it was "to protect my life and health".

That doesn't really make sense, seeing he was haveing the procedure, you think it would be something you would sign if you were haveing it done.

I have no memory of ever haveing to sighn something when I had it done, I am sure I must have but it was probably just like any minor surgery form.

April 23rd, 2007, 04:32 PM
yeah..but glasslass probably had it done..a long time ago (i beleive she is much older than us...i won't guess though, but probably more than 15 years ago). :)

on a funny note (and don't ask me WHY im posting here..but I guess I need to vent even though its the opposite to the main thread here when you think about it)...being i'm a regular person (28 to 32 days...max!)...i am going on 33 days here. I have NEVER wished for "my friend" to come visit more than I am right now lol.

April 23rd, 2007, 05:24 PM
Yeah - 32 years ago. Basically, it was a consent form so the doc wouldn't have to deal with an angry wife. How could a woman not want babies! Ok! just to show how much older - The pill first became available when I was a freshman in high school. Before that we heard about "rubbers", saran wrap, and shaken coca-cola douche. :fingerscr :fingerscr :laughing:

April 23rd, 2007, 05:31 PM
eww...saran wrap...can you imagine how painful that would be??

April 23rd, 2007, 05:40 PM
Speaking of painful if I remember anything(can't imagine why it stuck in my head) from an ancient Egypt documentary I watched once. Women used to use a half hollowed out lemon as a diaphram.....and my grandma (who's a little crazy so don't know how true) said they used to reuse condoms in her day:yuck:, I imagine it's true as she grew up in Germany and things were hard to come by and expensive. So women not wanting to get pregnant or have children is not a new thing.

April 23rd, 2007, 05:44 PM
true. i had heard of the lemon thing before...

you know what I don't get?? How is it that a lot of other species can't get pregnant unless they are in "heat" but with humans it's like the opposite??

(sorry..i've spent way too much time thinking about stuff like this today! its amazing where your mind goes when you think you might be pregant)

i swear, my co-worker sitting across from me must be going mad from all the tapping I'm doing...i can't stop this nervous twitch!! i can't sit still.

April 23rd, 2007, 07:00 PM
I have an aunt (a psychiatrist) who sat on an FDA panel and the whole issue of including serious dysmenorrhoea and there are some medications that are helpful if your situation is really severe!! (But I mean severe!!!) Even psychotherapy can help and tis is not to suggest women need more help than men!! But it can help one in designing one's own coping mechanisms.

That said, one can try other forms of relaxation - along with doing something about the pain relief - to help with the mood swings. I myself suffered from endometriosis and then cancer that required surgery and so I no longer have them and certainly do NOT miss them!!! It did have other negative repercussions but of course we can always adopt.

Have you discussed this with your gynecologist - s/he might have some ideas? Or you may have some other problem that is adding to it all?

April 24th, 2007, 12:55 AM
I wouldn't mind being a surrogate once though... I kinda want to know what it's like to be preggers (I said kinda, not REALLY! :D), but I wouldn't want to keep the thingy when I'm done being preggers...

It's kind of scary though because if these patches don't do it for me, I'm pretty well at the end of the line as far as hormonal contraceptives go... Tube tying just seems so permanent to non-committal me :o but it might become my only option...

April 24th, 2007, 08:22 AM
if I am..the "P" word (i just feel weird saying it) ..lets just say I am not liking it so far. I have been moody, sore boobs, sore abdomen, crampy, feeling sick for 2 days. I almost had to get off the subway yesterday because I thought I was going to be sick (and I never throw up)!

I'm giving it a week before i'm worrying, just in case though...

April 24th, 2007, 10:00 AM
With me it's not the mood swings that get me it's the pain.I will snap at times and it's then I wish I had a female partner.At least a female understands a female.LOL

I was on the pill for 20 years.And it was great.My period lasted 3 days.Only had little cramps and was able to plan my yearly trips around it..:D

I went off the pill because the Ex and I wanted a baby.Well that happened but not in a good way.I had a tubal pregnancy with twins.I went through hell.Won't get into it,to long.

Years passed(his A$$ was kicked out)..So because I'm a smoker my gyno gave me the altamatum.Quit or go off the pill.Well I wasn't going to quit.I know I know..LOL

Well the chance of me having a tubal again was high.So I said I wanted to get fixed.My daughter was 15 and no more babies for me.Well OMG,the crap I went through to have it done.My gyno had to have a meeting with the hospital directors.I had to have at least 3 medical conditions(I had like 12)..All this crap was because I was a Catholic and it was a catholic hospital.

Well to make a long story short,I had my tube burnt.There is no way of getting pregnant with the burning.And trust me,it's been 5 1/2 years.:)

Now the issues I have had since having this done and being off the pill is the PAIN.It gets soooooo bad.And I mean bad.Nothing works for me except T3's.And I bleed like a stuffed pig..Sorry guys.LOL

I was so stressed that I didn't have a period in March..Then a few weeks ago one of my best friends Grandmother died and two days I lost my Brother-in-law.Well "buddy" showed up in full force.I ended up taken a day off and 3-T3"s later the pain left.It was bad.

Sometimes I wish I was still on the pill.Life was so much easier...:sad:

So the way I look at it,and have told my male co-workers,all men are coming back as women.....:D

Mocha's mum
April 24th, 2007, 06:48 PM
I wouldn't mind being a surrogate once though

I don't know if I could do that....the being sick and getting fat for a while, and then never being able to fit into your pants....seems like a pain in the you-know-where to me. It would be interesting though, eh? Just to see what it was like.

I was pregnant once - had a miscarriage before I knew I was preggers. I was good with it then and still am as I was young at the time (17). All I wanted was mashed potatoes and gravy...:laughing: I can't imagine having strange cravings all the time!

April 24th, 2007, 09:15 PM
I like this thread.:)

I've actually had some pretty weird dreams about having babies. I think it is a deeply buried maternal instinct trying to break through. I had one where I started to have one but wasn't ready or something so tried to push it back in.:P It wasn't really a bad dream just very surreal. I didn't do a lot of pretending to take care of a baby when I was little so maybe that has something to do with not really wanting one now.:shrug: I dressed the neighbours siamese cat up though and put her in a buggy. She didn't seem to mind, she was my best friend.:o As for weird cravings I don't even want to know how weird that would get if I got pregnant, i'm already pretty bad. I've heard some woman even get pica when they are pregnant and will go so far as to eat dirt!!! I think I can go without that.:p

I had an interesting appointment yesterday with a reumotologist. He prescribed Trazadone. I've tried other anti-depressants in the past like paxil, effexor, zoloft not for depression really it was more complicated and health related so none ever did anything good, usually just made me uptight or foggy. So Trazidone is also used to treat sleeplessness, tension, pain and anxiety. It is definitely already helping with tension, i'll have to wait till next month to see if it actually helps cramps though. I thought wow this is a real multi purpose drug! If anyone has any experience with it please do share.

The other thing I learned yesterday is that I don't have a "dowager's hump". If any of you are developing something like that don't let your Dr just go o well it happens. I think there can be some different reasons for it but it can be treated and minimized if it is swelling. I'm 33 so it is fairly unusual at my age, however I went through three Drs that acted as if it was just part of normal aging in woman. A naturopath, a physiotherapist and a Dr each told me it was a fat deposit commonly seen in older woman and in order to get rid of it I would have to lose body fat everywere(naturopath also said to massage it). I'm about a size ten, not all that big I kept asking myself why do people much heavier not have one then? Luckily didn't just leave it and finally managed to get a referral to this specialist that assures me he can get it to go down.:fingerscr He said regular Drs usually don't know what it is and just call it a hump. In my case it is actually inflammation of the joints caused by Spondyloarthropathies and something to do with being over flexible and over reactive nervous system. Anyway I see A LOT of woman with this type of thing so I thought I'd mention this in case it helps someone who is struggling with it.

April 26th, 2007, 11:44 PM
All my friends joke that they'll know if I were to get pregnant because I'd eat "normal" know veggies and stuff most other people eat. LOL. I'm exceedingly picky in what I eat and so it would likely be easy to tell when I would be pregnant.

Never really had a scare....probably not going to have one anytime soon....which is a good thing and a bad thing all in one.:rolleyes: :frustrated:

I never really thought that I was regular (before going on the pill) but my ex-boyfriend always knew when I was having my period before even I had a chance to say anything. Then again that may have come about with having a sister and mother ;). I suppose the really smart ones (lol) do on occasion notice these things and can kind of add for themselves! :p

After the pill...well I was always regular but it definately didn't get any better the longer I was on a pill. It seemed like the longer I was on a pill the stronger the cramps would get and the more worried I got about leaking. It seems to be turning out the same with the Depo shot too. I've been using it for 6 months and now I've suddenly gotten cramps for the first time and an actual period (though not as bad as I was on the pill). I'll have to see how the next three months go. :frustrated:

Dunno if I want to be a mother but if I do become one it isn't going to be for a long while. Like maybe five or six years yet. If the docs say its too dangerous past 30 then I guess too bad so sad I'll either go through with it anyway or demand to get the tubes tied off forever. I'll also make sure that they do it PERMANENTLY and not the "reversible" kind that my mom had done (without her consent...the reversible part...not the actual tubal ligation...she didn't find out it was "reversible" until about 8 or 9 years ago when one of the "revisible" clips got inflamed and infected...that was fun >.< ).

Arron wants to adopt...:shrug: I'm not sure what I want anymore...All I know is I want to have a few things cleared up and out of the way...


April 27th, 2007, 09:06 AM
Just some helpful info for you ladies on the pill.If at anytime you are taking antibiotics,use EXTRA protection or refrain from the "wild thing"..:D..The antibiotics takes over the pill.How do I know you ask?This is how I became a mother 20 years ago...:D ..Yes she was an oops,but I would NEVER change a thing.My daughter is my life and my world.

April 27th, 2007, 06:01 PM
I could never be a surrogate - I just know it, even if it a purely theoretically issue at this point. I did freeze eggs before my surgery though so that possibility is there but with my work, my health, I have to have the right time!!!

Prin, have you tried depro? Kinda drastic I know but it does work for some women. I tried for several months. (I was desperate and it did certainly help with the endometriosis and the pain and the moods wings even.)However, I am no fan of any of that stuff tho I read and write and review too many freakin studies !!!- Now there is a wonderful new (as in well done, independently financed) study that shows how much breast cancer has gone down amg a very large sample of nurses who were on estrogen before. Now their level of cancer is so much lower!!!

And, antibiotics often interfere with the pill, much to the dismay of many who discover it the wrong way, sigh!

April 27th, 2007, 08:41 PM
CK, Depo is terrible. The more studies come in on it, the more researchers tell women never to use it. I'd never use it.

April 27th, 2007, 08:48 PM
The antibiotics takes over the pill.

You're right. I've been on antibiotics seven different times for the past months and the pharmacist tells me everytime.

April 28th, 2007, 11:06 AM
My sister was on the Depo for some time.And she went off it.I hadn't seen for her for about a year.The family got together(due to my Brother-In-Laws death a month ago,her husband)and she put on extra pounds.And not only that,she has HOOTERS...:eek: ...I'm serious.I had to ask where the heck she got them..LOL..She has always been small.But OMG.I was so jelous.

Frenchy,the problem is,there are some pharmacists that don't mention this to women.And I wish they would.I found out after the fact.And how I did was I actually read the pamphlet that was attached to the back of the pill dispencer.I guess it does pay to read the fine print.LOL

Like I said,I wouldn't change a thing on being a Mum.I love it.And I have raised her(on my own) and she has grown to be a beautiful woman.And we are soooooo very close.....:)

Mocha's mum
April 28th, 2007, 10:53 PM
If at anytime you are taking antibiotics,use EXTRA protection or refrain from the "wild thing"

I heard the same about grapefruit juice.....