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Why was he mad??

meb999
November 15th, 2006, 07:52 PM
People are so weird sometimes. I took Buster for a walk, and, since he's been home alone all day, he had lots of energy. So I decided to bring him rollerblading (ok, before any of you ream into me about 'forced' exercise, I let him drag me around, never the other way around...and never more than 20 minutes!!).

So here we are having a grand ol' time when see a small dog and 2 people in the distance. So I cross the street because I'm on rollerblades and I don't find I have as good control over Buster as when I'm on foot. So the guy (and his son) and his GSD puppy start sprinting towards us. So I put Buster in a sit-stay. i can see all of Buster's hairs are going up and he's starting to take a fight stance because the puppy was pulling on the leash and headed right for us.

The guy says : ooo, can they play?

I say : not a good idea (as I'm trying to keep Buster in a sit while rolling around on blades (not the best rollerblader!) my dog isn't great with other dogs (for those who don't know...well...my dog isn't great with other dogs!! --- we're working on it!!)

the guy keeps advancing, so now I have to put Buster in a down position because he's getting more antsy, and taking an even more agressive stance.

The guy : yeah, but my dog is only a puppy
me : please, my dog isn't great with other dogs, it's not a good idea
the guy : but he's only three months old (now he's close enough that the puppy is actually pawing at Buster...
I say : LISTEN!! NO, please leave us alone (Still trying to keep Buster down and stay on my feet at the same time)

Then he strolls off calling me a b!tch (nice language in front of his kid)

:confused: :confused: :confused: :confused: Did I do something wrong???

jawert1
November 15th, 2006, 07:58 PM
Not at all, so many ppl assume because their dogs don't have history, yours shouldn't either. Peaches is leash aggressive to NO end, which has taken tons of patience and training to deal with - I get ppl all the time that assume because both she and Simon are with me, that they're both fine with other dogs (def. not so). I'm sorry you had a bad experience with that jerk, but one side of me is more sorry that his kid is being raised with those kinds of values. You did what was best for you and Buster, and that's the only thing you can really count on :)

mummummum
November 15th, 2006, 08:11 PM
meb999, he put his ego before the safety of his dog and child, you did not. You did the RIGHT thing that every responsible dawg person does and unfortunately his poor little puppy is likely going to get bitten a few times because of this guy's lack of common sense , dog-knowledge and just plain courtesy.

meb999
November 15th, 2006, 08:22 PM
thanks guys :o I was starting to wonder if I'd broken some unwritten rule...

jiorji
November 15th, 2006, 08:23 PM
umm well if anyone screamed at me to leave them alone i'd probably say more than call you a b**** lol
i guess it's a choice of wording and new dog owners...hehe

~michelle~
November 15th, 2006, 08:31 PM
mebb this is like what i have to put up with when i ask people not to pet the dogs (especially when ive just gotten them and dont know their history) some people just dont understand. :( :frustrated:

meb999
November 15th, 2006, 08:36 PM
umm well if anyone screamed at me to leave them alone i'd probably say more than call you a b**** lol


It wasn't so much a scream as a loud NO! you'd really be offended? I guess that's it then....:o

jiorji
November 15th, 2006, 08:41 PM
well, lol honestly i'm the kind of person who thinks "what the f*** is up her a**??" when someone gives me dirty looks on the subway LOL so umm...I guess it would make me wonder...crazy girl on rollerblades haha;)

Frenchy
November 15th, 2006, 08:43 PM
You did what you had to do! This guy didn't get the message the first time :shrug: People are weird,just was at the vet and the vet tech was holding Bella's leash to take her in the back but she was still talking to me. A couple came in with a black lab,they just let him approach Bella without asking ,saying to their dog ; oh yes,another nice doggie.So I put myself between the 2 dogs turning my back on them.:shrug: I know Bella wouldn't have done anything but I don't like it when dogs I don't know come near "my" dogs. And I wasn,t the one holding Bella's leash so I felt I had to protect her.

TeriM
November 15th, 2006, 09:23 PM
You were right. This is one of my pet peeves. I hate when I am walking along and they say "oh, my dog is friendly" as it comes flying full tilt at Lucy (who is unpredictable/not great on leash and especially hates little yappy dogs). I just say .. well, mine is not friendly so grab yours before she eats it for breakfast.

Also, I always am sure to put my dogs on a leash if they are off leash and someone is walking towards me with a leashed dog. I think that is just being polite and respectful.

technodoll
November 15th, 2006, 10:00 PM
i have just one question... don't yell at me... why would any dog not be good with a 3-month puppy? :confused: it would make me look at the owner in a "what's wrong with you if you can't socialise your dog with a puppy" kinda way... just IMO. please don't shoot me! :o

meb999
November 15th, 2006, 10:24 PM
Buster was never socialised....I've tried my best to socialise him (written more than one thread about it....). I know it's a problem, and I've seen more than one trainer about it. Now, I just try to avoid confrontational situations.

Some dogs he just dislikes from the get-go, others he doesn't. when he's leashed, it's worse. He gets very defensive. I'm pretty sure he wouldn't have done anything, but his body language was showing agression (until I put him in a down stay). Plus the pup was pawing at his face, and why take the chance? I have enough stress in my life without having to deal with that. Rescues come with alot of baggage, this is Busters baggage. When we got him he had scars on his rear legs (which have pretty much disapeared thanks to polysporin!!), like puncture wounds. I'm sure he's been in more than one nasty dog fight. He's a boxer, if he shows any aggression, he'll be blamed right away.

it would make me look at the owner in a "what's wrong with you if you can't socialise your dog with a puppy" kinda way...
I know you too well to interpret this as saying I'm a bad owner....but I've been wrong before....and I certainly hope that isn't what you're implying.

If I wanted to introduce him to the puppy, it has to be done OFF LEASH, not in the middle of a busy street, where the pup is pulling on HIS leash to see my dog (therefor taking what could be perceived as an agressive stance) and Buster trying to defend himself because he feels trapped (by the leash)

Why take the chance? Why insist when someone tells you no?

technodoll
November 15th, 2006, 10:30 PM
marie-eve i know you're one of the best moms around :love: i was just commenting in a general way (not about you!), trying to look at it from the other person's perspective... trying to answer the title of this thread (why was he mad?) for sure this guy doesn't know you, had no idea buster's a rescue with a history, he was just happy about his puppy and probably not knowledgeable about dogs in general, including body language, etc, and boxers are in general a friendly, happy-go-lucky breed, etc... i'm not saying he was right to insult you (b@stard himself for doing that!) BUT in a way, i can relate, you know?... :o i was once a young ignorant dog owner too :rolleyes:

meb999
November 15th, 2006, 10:32 PM
marie-eve i know you're one of the best moms around :love: i was just commenting in a general way (not about you!), trying to look at it from the other person's perspective... trying to answer the title of this thread (why was he mad?) for sure this guy doesn't know you, had no idea buster's a rescue with a history, he was just happy about his puppy and probably not knowledgeable about dogs in general, including body language, etc, and boxers are in general a friendly, happy-go-lucky breed, etc... i'm not saying he was right to insult you (b@stard himself for doing that!) BUT in a way, i can relate, you know?... :o i was once a young ignorant dog owner too :rolleyes:

:rolleyes: I guess it doesn't help that I'm tired and WAYYYY oversensitive!!! :rolleyes: :D

technodoll
November 15th, 2006, 10:34 PM
and i'm too zonked to choose my words right the first time! :o

hazelrunpack
November 15th, 2006, 10:43 PM
Frankly, I think the guy was at least a little mad in the :crazy: sense. If I have a puppy out on a walk, I don't want him hurt. If I see another dog, I make sure I ask before I let my puppy approach--because, as you say, you never know what baggage a strange dog might be staggering under, and not all dogs are good with puppies! To let his pup approach Buster despite your warning that he wasn't good with other dogs...well that was just plain crazy! Don't beat yourself up--you did good. It's the other guy who was being irresponsible...

Prin
November 15th, 2006, 10:50 PM
thanks guys :o I was starting to wonder if I'd broken some unwritten rule...

The only unwritten rule you broke, IMO, was that you were too nice... Like techno said, from the newbie point of view, it's different and you have to be clearer.. I mean, who cares if a dog's not great with other dogs?

Now if a dog mauls every dog he sees, that's a different story.;)

Telling somebody your dog isn't social, or isn't great doesn't tell a newbie what's really going on. Telling them, "My dog attacks other dogs because he has a bad past, so please stay away," is a lot clearer..:shrug:

TeriM
November 15th, 2006, 10:51 PM
I wish I could explain Lucy's reaction. We were actually very concerned about getting Riley because while I knew she eventually would be very good with him but I really worried that she might hurt him initially. Thankfully that all worked out ok (a few tense moments the first week).
Lucy was well socialized with other dogs but the majority of her issues (I believe) came from two incidents. The first was a jack russell who beat her up when she was about 6 months old (second fear period) and I also think that she had something happen when we boarded her overnight at a kennel at around that age. I should have been more pro-active in overcoming this problem at the time but didn't. She is quite good off leash (unless some yappy little dog charges at her) and prefers males to females but she can be leash agressive. Interestingly enough she actually seems more social on leash with us having a second dog.

We are being very careful with Riley. (Second animal always benefits from the knowledge gained from the first :( ). He has had puppy classes, goes to doggy day care a few days per week and is now in obedience classes. We really don't want any of Lucy's "issues" to be passed on to him.

technodoll
November 15th, 2006, 11:15 PM
Telling them, "My dog attacks other dogs because he has a bad past, so please stay away," is a lot clearer..


prin that's a good piece of advice... i find that dog owners are alot more understanding and cooperative when they are told the whole story... makes them more "aware" IMO :pawprint:

Prin
November 15th, 2006, 11:19 PM
Definitely. And it becomes less of a "because I don't like your face" argument.:shrug:

So if you don't want people petting your dog because you don't like their face, just mention some sort of contagious fungus. It's ok for you because you already have it.:D

technodoll
November 15th, 2006, 11:20 PM
"why? my dog has tuberculosis, that's why!" :D

Joey.E.CockersMommy
November 16th, 2006, 12:26 AM
I dont think you did anything wrong - I always have to tell people that Joey isnt good with other dogs -and I prefer to either let them sniff breifly or not at all - but there is always those people that insist and let their dog get right in your dogs face. :frustrated: no matter what you tell them.

Golden Girls
November 16th, 2006, 02:01 PM
I agree, that guy was so odd. I mean if you told me it's not a good idea for my dog to approach yours ... heck I wouldn't :eek: and I'd be happy that you warned me. Geez some people

meb999
November 16th, 2006, 06:44 PM
"My dog attacks other dogs because he has a bad past, so please stay away," is a lot clearer..:shrug:

yeah...then jiorji would REALLY think I'm a B!tch!!!
i'd probably say more than call you a b****

technodoll
November 16th, 2006, 07:00 PM
you guys say "bitch" like it's a bad thing... :D

kmjx65
November 16th, 2006, 07:12 PM
i have just one question... don't yell at me... why would any dog not be good with a 3-month puppy? :confused: it would make me look at the owner in a "what's wrong with you if you can't socialise your dog with a puppy" kinda way... just IMO. please don't shoot me! :o

My friend's dog hates puppies. She's fine with other dogs but just really hates puppies...I dunno why.

Prin
November 16th, 2006, 08:37 PM
Puppies are irritating and have bad manners (in general). A lot of older dogs aren't tolerant of puppies.

Maya
November 16th, 2006, 08:48 PM
You have every right to tell someone you don't want them coming near you for any reason. You may not always have time to come up with a good explanation!!!! This reminds me of the article that was posted some time back about people that get angry when their dog gets in your dogs face and then gets nipped. I haven't had a dog but i've seen this happen and had people be offended because I didn't want their dog jumping on me and kissing me. If someone came running towards me that I didn't know i'd be a little freaked out too.:shrug: Grrr people.:evil:

technodoll
November 16th, 2006, 08:49 PM
Puppies are irritating and have bad manners (in general). A lot of older dogs aren't tolerant of puppies.

replace "puppies" with "kids" and i can totally relate, LOL! :D grroowwl growwwl

Mocha's mum
November 18th, 2006, 07:16 PM
I don't think there is anything wrong with what you did. I don't like rambunctious dogs playing with Mocha due to his back condition (maybe I'm too overbearing....), and people generally understand that. Buddy needs a little more education; just because you have a puppy, doesn't mean that other dogs will be receptive to it...

Well done you for keeping your cool! :thumbs up

Smiley14
November 20th, 2006, 10:46 PM
Oh, this frustrates me to no end! You did NOTHING wrong! You told the guy NO more than once before having to raise your voice to make your point. You should not have to say NO more than once and the fact that this idiot did not listen to you and still kept on advancing and the fact that he forced you into having to raise your voice is NOT your fault. You did what was necessary to protect your dog and possibly his dog. As you said, it is not worth the risk and it is much better being cautious and only introducing in a controlled enviroment. You were not in a controlled environment at all and even if you had been, it is still your right to say no. He was the one being a rude jerk in this situation.

My previous dog was fearful agressive, so I too had to be extremely careful on walks or on vet visits. It infuriates me even know thinking back to idiots that would still try to approach him even after I told them very clearly not to get close as he was agressive. It is not your fault if people don't listen, but unfortunately, the law does hold you accountable if something bad does happen. So it's ALWAYS better to take the precaution and raise your voice or whatever it takes to protect yourself and your dog and the idiots of the world from their own stupidity. No means no, and people have to learn to respect that, even in doggie world.
As Prin suggested, giving a brief history helps people understand. I would very clearly say NO when they got too close and say, "I'm sorry, but he cannot be touched. He has fearful agression from a bad past and sometimes bites. Thanks for wanting to pet him though." Polite and firm while creating a little fearful doubt usually does the trick. :)

dtbmnec
November 20th, 2006, 11:27 PM
I was in a situation like that once.

We were babysitting a young (two years old tops) black lab from a friend of ours. She was almost never on a leash and didn't really know what do on it and definately did not know the word "heel". Casey would never hurt a thing, she was the cuddliest dog ever and the owners had no problems with her or anything (they actually had her trained since she was a puppy that she couldn't go over anything bigger than a foot high...so as long as we put a board or something at least a foot high she would stay behind it and only lean over but never cross it).

Anyways, so I'm out walking her with my dad when she went for a poop. We forgot a bag so dad ran back to get a bag (oopsey lol). While he was gone I was holding Casey and doing a pretty good job about it. Now I also have to mention that Casey's weight beat mine by at least 40 pounds if not more.

Another person walking her dog (one of the little ones...not chiuaua but not very big either...maybe 20 pounds) was heading towards me and Casey perked up. She was the type that EVERYONE and EVERYTHING was her friend even if it bit her nose off and this other dog wasn't good with other dogs. Well Casey pulled me across the street to meet her new friend even though I was pulling against her weight with all my strength (my feet were splayed and my feet were jumping at least a foot across the street with every lunge Casey took. I was actually CHOKING Casey because she was pulling so hard and I had to stop her from going up to this dog completely...not that she cared).

The owner started yelling at me for not being able to control Casey (which yes it was happening but it wasn't like I wasn't doing anything either) and didn't speed up or anything with her dog either. I was rather mad because I was trying to stop Casey she was just too excited to listen to someone who wasn't her owner and wasn't very leash trained! The other owner got so mad at me anyway....:frustrated:

Did the other owner do anything wrong? No. She did warn me but she was also an idiot because she hadn't tried to control her OWN dog either. We also had no idea that Casey would react this way but we then had either my mom or my dad with me at all times if I walked Casey.

No you didn't do anything wrong and he should be shot for saying those nasty things about you. You did exactly what I would have had I been in your position.

Megan

TMac
November 21st, 2006, 09:04 AM
Telling them, "My dog attacks other dogs because he has a bad past, so please stay away," is a lot clearer..


Actually - then I'm sure you would get "why don't you put the dog down if he's vicious!!" You just can't win with some idiot dog owners. You did exactly the right thing meb999. You can't worry about what people like that think.

i have just one question... don't yell at me... why would any dog not be good with a 3-month puppy? it would make me look at the owner in a "what's wrong with you if you can't socialise your dog with a puppy" kinda way... just IMO. please don't shoot me!

Not all dogs appreciate being charged at - puppy or not. Our trainer gave us a good quote: "its not the size of the dog, its the obnoxiousness of the behaviour". :D

TMac
November 21st, 2006, 09:07 AM
I've often had experiences like this and wondered if I can make a vest or something for my dog (like the Guide Dogs in Training vest) saying STOP! Dog in Training! ..or something like that...:crazy:

Anyone talented at the sewing machine?? I'd pay decent money if it actually worked!:thumbs up

technodoll
November 21st, 2006, 09:07 AM
Our trainer gave us a good quote: "its not the size of the dog, its the obnoxiousness of the behaviour".

oh! good quote! (goes to scribble it down to remember it)

:)