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What women want... really

HunterXHunter
May 30th, 2006, 08:39 AM
My girlfriend sent this to me in an e-mail...I think she's hinting at something :rolleyes: Anyhow, this is more for the guys on this forum :D

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What women want... really

Men wouldn't mind receiving gifts that have a lot of functions, but they don't appear to be what women want
WE NEED to talk - the four words that will make any guy's heart plunge into his gut - she said, after opening the gift.


Sigh, what did I do now?

To be honest, I wasn't fully sure if she would like the gift I had bought, but I certainly did not expect to have to 'talk' about it.

As far as gifts go, I thought it was okay. It was something she needed and I thought she would appreciate it.

I had bought her a mobile phone charger.

I mean, she was always forgetting to charge her phone so I thought it would be useful to have a back-up phone charger she could take around with her.

But I realise now that I, like many men before me, had become embroiled in a bad gift disaster.

Nearly all men, I dare say, would have gone through moments such as this - where a seemingly well-meaning gift was received with 'the look'.

The 'look' is a non-verbal form of communication perfected by women that delivers the message that the 'lookee' is in big trouble.

We have a terrible problem buying gifts for women - as if we were born without required brain parts to pick out gifts that women will like.

My brother, for one, is a fine example of someone completely devoid of the gift-giving sense.

He is, otherwise, a rather thoughtful, considerate person but, for some reason or other, cannot bring himself to buy anything that doesn't need to be plugged in.

He once bought my mother - the same mother who was then only coming to grips with the Internet - a flatbed scanner.

A year earlier, he had bought her an inkjet printer and thought the scanner would complement it nicely.

Even though she has since embraced the Internet wholeheartedly, the scanner still gets only the most minimal use.

She finds that it makes a rather handsome shelf.

Then there is Sidney, an uncle who bought my aunt a top-of-the-line PDA phone. The thing was twce the size of a normal phone and had so many functions, it was like a small computer.

We all thought it was seriously cool.

It took my aunt two months to work out how to change the ringtone.

She hasn't told him, but she doesn't really want a phone that can play powerpoint presentations.

She wants a pink one.

Then there is Martin, a friend who must surely take the cake.

The chemist gave his girlfriend what he thought was a killer Valentine's Day present: a cordless steam iron.

She didn't talk to him for two days.

The main problem, you see, is that all of us were buying gifts that we personally wouldn't mind receiving.

Men like things with a lot of functions. They do not appear to be what women want.

American humorist Dave Barry once described the ideal gifts for women like this: 'The gift should not do anything, or, if it does, it should do it badly.'

I suppose that's why women like diamonds so much: They are essentially useless.

But consider the following pairs of gift options.

Gift 1: A one-litre pack of Dove brand shower cream in a handy plastic dispenser. Good for the whole family to use.

Gift 2: A pack of five small decorative soaps, shaped like fruit.

Or...

Gift 1: A table lamp with a 3M polarising light filter to cut out glare and also uses a special energy-saving bulb that can provide 10,000 hours of light.

Gift 2: A small hand-made scented candle in the form of an angel that the recipient will never ever light.

To a man, any of the two Gift 1 options is clearly superior, but should they buy it for a woman, they will find themselves in serious gift-giving trouble.

And even when some of the more courageous among us try to adhere to this 'useless gift' rule, we seem able to mess things up.

A friend, Rachel, recently received for her birthday three jars of beach sand from her boyfriend.

They were taken from three different beaches in Australia. He no doubt thought he had, in that gift, achieved the nirvana of boyfriend sensitivity.

As Rachel described the gift to me, the jars were not decorative ones but rather simple glass bottles with a label on them, not unlike a geological survey sample.

Her reaction initially was to pour out the sand from each of the jars assuming the real gift - possibly something with diamonds on it - was buried within.

When it became evident this was not the case, she remarked: 'Haha, where's the real present?'

I understand the relationship is now a little rocky.

But whatever it is, men, I urge you not to give up. Just keep at it and one day I'm sure you'll buy that one thing you think is useless in just the right way and she'll open it, look at you lovingly and say: 'We need to talk'.

technodoll
May 30th, 2006, 08:57 AM
giggle!! so true!! :D i'm only starting to like the iPod & accessories i got for christmas, and still haven't figured it out much... it's a tool, not a toy... but hubby did balance it out with ridiculously expensive body-cream that i only use once a month cuz it costs so much and i want to stretch it out! ha ha! he said "i can't win, can i?" :D

Prin
May 30th, 2006, 12:30 PM
It was something she needed THAT's the problem. Women can always go out and buy whatever they need, but buying the luxuries is what presents are for. Things we wouldn't buy ourselves...

All I know is that if my man got me an iron for a gift, I'd be single again.;)

HunterXHunter
May 30th, 2006, 12:45 PM
THAT's the problem. Women can always go out and buy whatever they need, but buying the luxuries is what presents are for. Things we wouldn't buy ourselves...

All I know is that if my man got me an iron for a gift, I'd be single again.;)

But I like the presents my gf has gotten me...they were all things that I needed...I guess women are just troublesome that way :evil: (uh-oh...:crazy: )

Prin
May 30th, 2006, 12:47 PM
That's because to men, luxury means something you need, only the better quality version.;)

Frenchy
May 30th, 2006, 12:48 PM
That is too funny!!!I guess it depends on the woman.One year,for my birthday,my bf (ex) paid for my driver's license renewal...but I was glad because money was real tight.And personaly,I rather have my bf spend money on something I need/will use.But he has to ask me first!Then,again,I would never say no to a diamong ring :p :thumbs up :fingerscr

jessi76
May 30th, 2006, 12:55 PM
my bf gave me a printer once, so I now give him a list of items I want, complete w/ PICTURES, where to buy such things, and what size & color to get. I call it "flashcards for the gift-challenged".

meb999
May 30th, 2006, 01:13 PM
That is too funny!!!I guess it depends on the woman.One year,for my birthday,my bf (ex) paid for my driver's license renewal...but I was glad because money was real tight.And personaly,I rather have my bf spend money on something I need/will use.But he has to ask me first!Then,again,I would never say no to a diamong ring :p :thumbs up :fingerscr
LOL! I'm with you Frenchy. Last Christmas my bf bought me winter tires. The year before that, he paid for my license and registration. I'd rather get that then jewlery anyday. Then again I'm a very, very poor student, so I'd be exstatic if he gave me a 20$ bill in an envelope!

I wouldn't say no to a diamond ring either....actually to tell the truth, I asked my bf, if he ever gets me an engagement ring, to get either a ruby or a fake diamond. (He was very upset, and said he's NEVER get a fake diamond...)
I don't see the point in spending SO MUCH money on diamonds. I'd be too scared to wear it, what if I loose it? Plus, diamonds are only valuable because one compagny owns them all (or almost all), and only puts a small amount of them on the market. They are discovering more and more diamond mines. I predict someday, they'll be worth alot less. Did you know aluminum was once really expensive and sought after? Kings used to make their crowns out of it...now we use it to wrap up our leftover food....

ok...I'm threadjacking...I'll stop now.

Skryker
May 30th, 2006, 02:02 PM
All too funny! I guess I'm atypical, though. I asked for a new toaster and a new vacuum for Christmas, and my husband thought I was nuts. He also flat out refused to buy either one. No way. Uh-uh. He was not going to get into trouble that way-and he didn't think they were good gifts. :D

It's not that I don't appreciate luxury gifts at all. It's just that, well, we needed a new toaster and I hate our vacuum, so it made more sense to me to get those . Here's how unromantic I am-our first Christmas together, I was shopping with my Mom and saw a ring I loved-at 2/3s off, since the store was liquidating its inventory. So I went home and told my man, "I just found my engagement ring-and it's on sale!!" Dutiful man that he is (and seriously relieved not to have the burden of choosing a ring himself) off he went to get it. ;) He loves telling people that story-"she chose her own ring, and it was 2/3 off!"- for some reason.

Skryker
May 30th, 2006, 02:03 PM
That's because to men, luxury means something you need, only the better quality version.;)

Guess I think like a guy, then. :crazy:

jawert1
May 30th, 2006, 03:50 PM
My ex was a champ at gift getting, but seemingly only at Christmas/my birthday (which is one day apart). One year he got me diamond earrings and a new Palm Pilot - which as my one friend put it, a perfect blend of geek and chic - neither would I buy for myself but both I love dearly, needed and still wear/use.

Skryker
May 30th, 2006, 04:36 PM
Ugh, the Christmas/birthday combo! I always said that if I had a kid with a birthday close to Christmas, I would designate July 25th the kid's unofficial birthday, so it would feel special.

My own is just before Valentine's Day-way too many heart themed birthday presents and cards in my life. Plus, try and go out for a birthday dinner just before Valentines. It stinks!

Pardon my thread-jacking!

My husband freely admits to being gift-challenged, and asks for broad hints and lists (although, he's made me cry with unexpected and completely thoughtful gifts all on his own, so I don't think he is gift challenged at all). No ego involved at all. And he reciprocates with great hints himself, so I never get stuck.