- Pet forum for dogs cats and humans 


The worse week ever

February 3rd, 2006, 12:59 PM
Ok, well as you know I am a single mom with a young daughter. Now picture this. First Harley gets attacked, then other dog injured, So I paid half the bill, =133$
Now re enroll him in class, behaviours have started right after incedent. = 220$
NOW my car broke. Have to get it seen but if it is what we think it might be = 1100$- 2000$

I am crying right now. I can not do it. What sacrifices can I make. I feel like giving up. I need the car to work to support Harley and Kayla. Need OB class for both of us to gain confidence again.
Vet bill I paid

I have no credit cards I can use, I am still trying to pay off bills.
What can I do

February 3rd, 2006, 01:37 PM
Oh, Rottielover, I'm so sorry this is happening to you. Believe me, I know it's not easy. My sister has been through similar situations. She ended up talking to a couple of banks. One of them agreed to consolidate her current loans & credit cards and gave her the extra money she needed to buy a new car. At the very least, it gave her only one payment a month to worry about, and because she stretched it out over a 5 year period, the payments were actually lower per month than before she consolidated. She's had to do this a couple of times over the years, but it has gotten easier as the children got older. You could also try selling some stuff on e-bay, if you have anything hanging around the house. Hang in there, though. It's bound to get better in time. :grouphug:

February 3rd, 2006, 04:01 PM
Rottielover me and my hubby once sold are whole CD collection to Deja VU discs. We made $150 and then we ate. Ofcourse we sold a lot of our CD's but hey I can always get them back. Now that is one of my favourite stories.

You will get past and when you do you come out a better person.

Cut little services like call waiting, display, voicemail. If you have a cell phone cancel your house phone. Basic cable.

Cut internet. That is what we did till we got out of debt. What a relief. Now we are doing great and feel very proud we made it on so little.

Just some suggestions ofcourse what worked for me might not work for you. I hope this helps.

Good luck!

Oh and one more thing.... when your going to the mechanics wear a short cut top..... Discounts baby!

February 3rd, 2006, 04:09 PM
Rottilover,it seems things are ganging up on you and I am really sorry.
Have a good cry and then look at things you can do without,don't you have an ex in the background who could help you out,at least with the car???
Sometimes,in my experience,a good cry,a good nights sleep and a new day,brings solutions :love:

February 3rd, 2006, 04:55 PM
If you can't pay your bills, I'd get rid of the car. You can either bus it or hook up with organizations like Communauto when you need a car.

February 3rd, 2006, 06:44 PM
I can not rid the car, my daughter has to daycare, and I work.....It would be 2 hours in the morning, and 2 hours at night. I just can't do it. As for I have only a cell phone, no internet.

February 3rd, 2006, 07:28 PM
Hi Rottielover,
I hear you, I know how hard it is to live as a single mother. The father of my eldest has never been around.
I hate to say it, but sometimes, having a roof over your head and food in your mouth is more important. Is there any way that you can leave the obedience until you find out more about your car? You seem to have a relationship with them, maybe if you explain to them the situation you can postpone it until the car is worked out. Maybe you have to keep him on leash until both of your confidence is back, or you get enough to pay for the car AND the OB. Two weeks seems far now, but I'm sure you can make it.:)
Aside from that, how are your bills? I will admit, only to you;) , that sometimes, if something comes up, I will pay half of one bill until the next month when I pay the whole amount. Of course you still have to pay it later, but, if it helps with the immediate problem, then you just don't order in or go to the movies, bum cigarettes instead of buying, etc. until all bills are back to where they should be.
Just know this, I'm not a single mother right now, but sometimes I still feel like giving up too. It's not the kids, it's money, there's never enough when you have kids and dogs.

My favourite quote, oh, I wish I had thought of this for that other thread, "Mother is the name of God to all children" - The Crow.

Good luck Rottielover

February 3rd, 2006, 07:52 PM
When I was younger and needed money to play the bills while in school (even scholarships don't pay the incredible costs at some American universities, I often wonder how some ppl do it), I took on extra jobs. I did all manner of things - rather than ask my parents who would have gladly helped but I wanted to be independent!! (They already were saddled with my half million dollar medical bills so I felt guily enough!! I know rationally that I should not have but emotionally, I felt I was costing them a smalll fortune and I am so fortunate they were able to pay for my care or I would not bne here.)

But this is about you and there are prob more things you can do now than I had available. Ever think of copying your CD's and selling the real ones (not the copies - which would be illegal and bring you more probs). Selling old clothes on consignment? Offering to help neighbours with special skills you might have - maybe you can teach older people who hate the idea of a classroom how to use the internet or something like that? (without charging them much - just enuf to help you and them).

I am not sure what you do for work but can you work extra hours? Do you have someone who can help you so you could cut back on daycare - it is important for kids to interact with others but do you have family close by? What about reselling old books? Having a garage sale? I too would have asked the other family if I could pay the half of the bill later - surely they would have understood since it was their dog who started the fight. And the OB clases could be done later could they not? Or are you worried about how your dog is around your child?

Please don't go to those places that offer payday loans whatever you do - I know one of the orderlies here at work who did that (he got into gambling and one thing led to another - I lent him the $$$ to pay it all back and I personally do not care if I ever see it - he is the most sincere, caring man who is wonderful with "my" kids and has no family in this country that I felt the need to help him!!! He does pay me what he can when he can - is there someone you know who might do that for you, someone you would confide in - who would respect you while helping you?

Do you have skills that many now do not have? Sewing? Pottery? Teaching music? (I taught piano and guitar lessons in Boston while in school - it was good money and I had fun doing it). I also worked in a lab - even tho that was not my most fav thing (I love research but being the grunt worker was not my idea of fun but it paid really well and then I moved up and as a med student worked PT at the Children's Hospital and another one (Women's - now part of Peter B. Brigham - the one that was used in the series St. Elsewhere (we all played extras now and then and made money doing that but we had to pay money to the actra's union, sigh for these nothing parts - like walking past someone in the hallway with an IV pole, lol) - and it helped me to be morwe proficient than most lab techs or other med students because I could find almost any vein! I also tutored students in chemistry, math,physiology and other sciences - another good money making arrangement (and teaching others hepes tyou to recall the info yourself!- esp in Boston with so many schools and universities!!! Fortunately, I lived in Brookline and I think there may have been 10 univsities in 2 sq miles, lol

So think of the special skills you have that might work for you, esp ones you can do at home while your child is there.

Good luck!!!! And it WILL get better, this too shall pass! (I once lived on $20 for an entire month - not sure I could do that now - my rent/utilities etc had been paid but that's all I had to eat with. I really looked for invitations to dinner but the fact is I was not a big eater anyway - I could get by on cereal and an apple all day, lol Still can! (Tho I do not advise it)

February 3rd, 2006, 09:13 PM
Sorry the financial hurdles seem to be mounting Rottielover, this must feel very overwhelming for you.

I too am wondering about the car.. as this is the "big" expense you're looking at right now.
Is there any way you can carpool it to work for now? Or bus it?
Is your daughter's day care far out of the way?

I relied on public transit for three years when I first went back to work - 90 miuntes each way - providing I connected with all three buses.
I didnt have children to drop off and pick up though.

Are there are family members who could loan you the car repair cash?

Cyberkitten's also given you some great possibilities, if any are workable for you ,to bring in some extra money.

I wish you all the best, and hope that things pick up for you soon.:grouphug:

February 3rd, 2006, 10:17 PM
I know the feeling. Sometimes you feel as though youre getting hit from every side don't you? I'm sending prayers for a break in the onslaught.

We've got two kids in college, they're there on student loans because I had cancer 6 years ago and that's a very expensive little hobby. But even with loans to cover their tuition it's still very expensive paying for the cars and their living expenses etc. My husband started a company last year so money is either really tight or just non-existent. I've got a scan coming up next month so every little ache and pain is magnified. My daughter wants to add more dance classes to her schedule--ka ching ! And of course the cars and the appliances seem to communicate with one another before they break down. I think they've set up a schedule so that there is always someone in the shop at any given time.

I didn't mean to jump in with my own little saga, just empathizing with you. I'm sure it must be extra tough to go through these times as a single parent becaue you don't get a break. You're being strong for her and whose shoulder do you get to cry on??

Our church keeps a food pantry going and when there is a fmaily going through a tough time we'll fill up bags of groceries for them. It stays very confidential. Our ministry is the one that runs the pantry and I have never known which families received the food. Maybe you could find out about that sort of thin in your area. Its' not the same as the chunk of money that you probably need right now but even a few meals can take a little pressure off you know?

February 4th, 2006, 12:30 AM
I can not rid the car, my daughter has to daycare, and I work.....It would be 2 hours in the morning, and 2 hours at night. I just can't do it. As for I have only a cell phone, no internet.
Have you looked into Communauto? It might be cheaper than having your own car.

February 5th, 2006, 12:19 AM
Rottielover, this is just to let you know that just about everyone goes through tough times at one point or another. When my hubby was in the military, we had to pawn his watch, not once but twice, to make it to payday. It doesn't seem like it now, but this will pass and better times are going to come. Hubby still has that watch too!.