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One year has gone by already

September 28th, 2005, 08:33 AM
A year ago this morning, I received the phone call that all adult children dread. My 86 year old father had died. It came as a shock since he had not been visibly ill. My dad, died in his sleep, at home. I am fortunate to know that his last hours were lived as he would have wished. He had seen all his children ( 8 of us) in the last few days before he died. My older brother had just returned from seeing his sons in BC and spent the day with dad. I had seen him the week before, and I am grateful that fate took me to our family home that day. I have the last picture taken of my dad. He's sitting is his favourite chair, looking out the big picture window at the chickadees in the pine trees, his faithful companion, Tippy, a little black dog, is at his feet. I treasure that photo.
My dad loved the Blue Jays, and the last game he watched, the Jays won. He enjoyed his cookies and a glass of milk before retiring for the night. He usually dozed off watching tv..usually a 'duster' as he liked to call western movies. My dad never did get to his bed. He fell asleep on the couch, and that's where my mom found him.
As I was the furthest from home, I was worried that I would not get to see my dad before the coroner's office came. But I did. My dad looked like he was sleeping, there was a faint smile on his face, no signs of distress, so I know his final moments were peaceful.
My dad didn't want any services and we all agreed that his wishes would be granted. We took my dad's ashes, and spread them on the Canadian Shield that he loved, below the pine trees that graced his property.
The day after my dad died, a beautiful bald eagle circled around my farm fields for about an hour....I think it was my dad's spirit letting me know all was well.
If you can...give your dad a hug for me. It's hard to believe a year has gone by already.

September 28th, 2005, 09:18 AM
I am so sorry for your loss...I could not imagine losing my mother...just know that your father is somewhere smiling down at you.

September 28th, 2005, 09:19 AM
I'm a firm believer in signs and I feel definitely your Dad was the eagle saying Goodbye. I lost my mom when I was almost 16 and I cherish my dad. :grouphug: to you on this difficult day.

September 28th, 2005, 01:29 PM
J&C, your post is a beautiful tribute to your love for your dad. It isn't easy losing a parent. I'm in tears now at work as I relate so much to what you're feeling today. My Pop has been gone 5 years now. We did not have a service either per his request. He felt people should come see him while living. My brother scattered his ashes in the mountains where they hunted together. I don't regret not having a service. Pop was a month short of being 85. Most of his siblings were older and had already passed and the rest would have had great hardship coming. Many families need the closure of a memorial service and this is a personal decision. It would have been an ordeal for my mom. Your memories touch me deeply. :grouphug:

September 28th, 2005, 01:55 PM
J&C what a nice way to honour your dad. He must be very proud of you right now. I worry so much having my dad aproaching his 70's and looking older and having Parkinsons. But I know life is what you make it and enjoying the time you have with your loved one should always be paramount.

God bless!

September 28th, 2005, 09:38 PM
J&C, I'm so sorry for your loss. I'm glad though that your memories are still fresh. :grouphug: