August 18th, 2005, 09:42 PM
We found out yesterday that another one of my man's friend's girlies is preggers- she's 21, and it's unexpected. She's the third friend he has that is preggers this summer. Then this morning, we found out his 21 year old cousin's girly is preggers too... None of these guys are ready, nothing was planned.
Needless to say we've stopped drinking the water around here... :D I'm gonna have to start double patching... :D
My man asked me "what's going on?!?" rhetorically, and I said, we musta been in the back makin' out when they were passing out the babies... :D
It's so weird how the kids one step up from us, like my oldest brother and cousins, all started having kids around 30, 33, etc. My age group is starting so young!! It's crazy! We're the most settled of almost all our friends, I think, and we're the ones who take the most precautions... :o
Anybody else notice this trend, or is it really in the water over here?
August 19th, 2005, 06:39 AM
Anybody else notice this trend, or is it really in the water over here?
:eek: It better not be in the water!!!! :eek:
***goes out to buy bottled water - fast!***
August 19th, 2005, 07:25 AM
I personally don't think it's about young people planning their families earlier. Rather, I think it has more to do with the fact that today, more young people are living for the moment and not worrying about the consequences--which in some cases ends up being a baby.
Futhermore, I think that SOME young people today simply don't get it...they've had everything handed to them on a silver platter and have never learned the value of a hard earned dollar. Having babies, buying cars and living the free life came to them, well, free. So, why take precautions? Why plan for stuff when money's covered?
August 19th, 2005, 07:52 AM
Well,I was pregnant at 17 with my oldest son(not to be recommended!),4 yrs later again(son)and another four years later a third son,something to do with the Olympics :D
Nothing was ever planned,but by the time we had our third son,we had all the"things"you are supposed to have,house,car etc...
But even if one baby had to sleep in a drawer,the love was no less...
Having it all and planned to the last diaper,is wonderful,but not always the most important.
August 19th, 2005, 08:41 AM
I don't think having babies young is a problem rather its having babies in unstable relationships.
I think the trend was always there. My mom was given up for adoption at 6 (can you imagine being six?) and her bio mom was 15 when she had her. And this is back in the day when it was really unacceptable tp have children out of wed lock.
That is one thing I promised my mom when I moved in with my BF is that I would marry before I had any children.
August 19th, 2005, 12:20 PM
Well, the docs are saying "Don't wait till you're financially stable" because fertility drops and drops as you head toward 40 and fertility treatments are not reliable enough to depend on...
I think it was if you had sex without a condom or any other protection for a year, at 20-25 you have an 84% chance of getting preggers, 25-30, you have a 76% change and 30-35, less than 63% chance.
I feel bad for those who wait and then can't have kids. It's terrible how they really want them and don't get them, while an irresponsible one night stand gives others a baby they don't want... C'est la vie!
(Oh and Luvmypit, I agree about the unstable relationships completely)
August 19th, 2005, 12:38 PM
luvmypit,hubbie and I married when we had our second son and we've now been married 40 yrs and still enjoy each others company :D
August 19th, 2005, 04:46 PM
over here no one is having babies till their 30s, and its drasticzally effecting our population gwoth, were actually in decline, the government is paying woman to have babies, you get up to $6000 min $4000 for having a baby here, and our population is still in decline, its our baby boomer,s we have too many of them so now its affecting us all esp our industries...
the sad thing is here, if a woman wants to have babies at a young age , say before 30yrs, she is quite looked down upon. which i think sucks, if a woman wants to be a mum i thnk thats jsut as good a job as any carreer out there..
and the funny thing is when my mum was 24yo she had three of us and that was normal, now if you see a 24yo with three is like she is simple or a tart or something...
it stinks that our country has become so career driven, if you dont have a hot career your seen as pretty inadequate round here, it sad... ppl forget that life exists ofthe day to day, not the high falutin careers.
i think its great to see youngish mums, they have the energy and spirit, but my sister had her man at 19yo and that did have impact, its only now at 32 she is catching up....
young or old, doesnt matter, as long as your responsible and want to love achild i think thats what counts... ladies round the world should do exactly what they want, its thier world......
August 19th, 2005, 04:57 PM
I think if you are capable of taking care of a child and want one then why not?
My man and I have been trying for a year but something is wrong. We figure we will give it a bit longer and if nothing by the time I finish school we'll go to a fertility doc. We want a baby but we're not in a huge hurry so if it happens now great if not we can deal with that.
August 20th, 2005, 11:58 AM
Melanie- I think that will change. Over here, I think that is how it was not too long ago, but now the generation that had parents who worked all the time are changing priorities and saying "Hey, feminism is not just working and having a career- it's CHOOSING what you want to do with your life". It's really true. If women are frowned upon for not having a career, that's not freedom either.
Jackie, I hope everything goes well eventually. A friend of mine is having trouble too and they're getting karyotyped to see if their DNA is compatible... Not too fun. Good luck. :) :fingerscr (You can drink all the water you want over here...)
August 20th, 2005, 05:17 PM
good one prin, i totally agree, its stinks that ppl calin to be modern ppl and foreward thinkers yet still judge if you dont fit inot societies required shape at the time, its simply like fashion really...
but prins onto it, choice is freedom, being forced into something yo udont want is far from the ideals of the sufferegettes and all our other sisters who fought for us in the past 100yrs....
i want freedom of choice, its all i want in life really..... ps becuase i refuse to go and work in sydney, hey its awful and a stink bomb and totally toxic, well then i am too seen to be a bit of a bum. i work about 20hrs a week, so its part time, but good cash, but the amount of ppl who see me as taking advantage of my husband and getthis being 'lazy' is wild. ppl jsut dont understnad why i wond do it. but at least hubby does not care, we are equals in this house and i would give him the same choices in life, in fact i have...
i jsut think ppl judege too much...
but i also think young girls should wait a bit, simply becuase life is a wild adventure and they need a bit of that, and to a certain extent i think life experience goes along way to beigna good parent, so i would prefer young girls to waittill at least21 or so in this country, 18 to me is a bit young, jsut for the girls sake, and also to make sure she is aware of those options andm akes her own individual choice in life....i jsut want girls to have a bit of fun first, and thats not drinkin or such, but jsut being independant and such...
but at lest you will ahve heaps of babies to playwith, yay :D
August 20th, 2005, 07:31 PM
I definitely think girls need independence. They need to know they CAN do it all on their own before they settle down. From my experiences, I know I can handle anything, whereas a lot of my friends who were in school the whole time I was travelling (and still haven't gotten out), haven't learned much about life and about themselves. When you shoot out on your own, you become such a better role model for anybody you can teach. :)