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Why Ask If You Don't (Rant)

shannon1233A
June 24th, 2005, 09:52 AM
Okay, I'm relatively new to the forum and maybe a bit sensitive BUT, why do people ask the questions when they don't want the answers? People, pet lovers come here because, I take it, they love their pets and want the best for them and want input on certain issues bothering them. Then when the majority don't agree with them, after much consideration and taking the time to answer, and in some cases research, if they don't like what they hear, they just take off without so much as a thank you. I understand people come and go...but to come, ask for input then take off without any consideration of the time others have given their problem, and of course, with only the best of intentions and thinking of the best for their pet, boom, we never hear from them again. This leaves me wondering, of course, what happened with that poor pet. Case in point: a regular poster asked for help regarding a problem with his dog escaping his kennel and destructive behaviour . Guess he didn't like the responses cause he hasn't been back since. I think alot of people gave his problem alot of thought, took the time to respond, and even suggested alternative measures to curb the problem :mad: The whole point is, I thought people came here because they loved their pets, wanted the best for them, but I guess THEIR own feelings come first and are more important than the well being of their "beloved" pet. Kind of frustrating to be left hanging forever, wondering if a certain pet is doing okay, and living the good life he/she deserves.

Sorry for the rant, but I've spent many sleepless nights, wondering how a certain dog or cat is doing after reading about a problem, solution then left hanging to wonder :mad: I PROMISE, WHEN I POST ASKING FOR HELP WITH SOMETHING, I WILL RESPOND AND KEEP ALL OF YOU PET LOVING PEOPLE KNOW WHAT'S HAPPENING. I MAY NOT AGREE WITH EVERYTHING, BUT I WON'T LEAVE YOU HANGING AND WONDERING WHAT'S HAPPENED CONCERNING THE PROBLEM I'VE ASKED ABOUT :grouphug:

Mockingcat
June 24th, 2005, 10:24 AM
Honestly, people don't like being told that they're irresponsible and cruel, even if their behaviour says otherwise.

It is always cruel to not seek treatment for a wounded animal. Full stop. No ifs ands or buts. (Ok, well obviously if there's a natural disaster or some such that prevents you from physically doing so.) "I don't have money", "I don't have a ride", or "My last dog got better and I didn't" are not excuses, and some people don't believe that.

I'm out of work right now. But my guinea pig wheezed a little, and both of the little buggers went to the vet. That meant that we get another lovely week of eaten ramen and hamburger helper.

Some people just don't seem to realize that animals are not a right, they are a privledge, and having them means denying yourself other things sometimes.

(*jumps down off the soapbox*. :P)

JDG
June 24th, 2005, 10:42 AM
I'm still pretty new too. . . .but, Wow! You know, I've contemplated writing pretty much the same thread, verbatim!!

I would have added:
- the people who post health questions about their pet VOMITTING, BLEEDING or having DIARRHEA on the board that says right it the board title 'if your pet is vomitting, bleeding or has diarrhea take them to the vet' grrrrr!

-People who give their life stories. We here to talk pets (a little teeny weenie tiny bit of personal information is nice - but no one really wants a novel about a trip to the grocery store, that time you went to the mall or 'that one time, at band camp') I like 'knowing' people by their pets. . .

anyways - I feel better too, hahahahahahhahhahaa. . . . .

Eleni
June 24th, 2005, 11:04 AM
-People who give their life stories. We here to talk pets (a little teeny weenie tiny bit of personal information is nice - but no one really wants a novel about a trip to the grocery store, that time you went to the mall or 'that one time, at band camp') I like 'knowing' people by their pets. . .
.

I personally like to get to know people.

And I do agree if people are asking questions about their pets they should be prepared to hear the answer good, bad or indifferent.


Eleni

kandy
June 24th, 2005, 11:19 AM
I think that sharing some personal information helps us to feel more 'connected'. I also think that it is sometimes necessary to give personal information in order to get the most appropriate advice on whatever issue you want advice on. And I like hearing about new babies and new jobs and new houses, etc., etc. I like to think that this forum is not just about the pets, its about the people who own them too. You never know, you could forge some lifelong friendships with people here. :grouphug:

I do agree that some posters want to have their actions or their thoughts validated, and get ruffled when people don't agree. I wonder if some of those are people who think it's funny to get us all riled up by telling us about their fictitious cat bleeding from every orifice and that they think it'll clear up on its own but just want to know how to get rid of the blood stains.

Beaglemom
June 24th, 2005, 11:49 AM
It would be nice to get a quick update to a problem an OP was having. I do wonder what happened to the pet in question and if the proper medical treatment/advice was seeked and what the outcome was. I think that it would also help anybody else who is experiencing something similar.

About the personal information. I have no problem with that. I don't think people get way too personal here. I like to know that there are people out there experiencing some of the same life issues/stages that I may be going through. It is nice to be able to get advice and/or support for many different things.

Prin
June 24th, 2005, 01:26 PM
All I can say is you can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink... :)

nymph
June 24th, 2005, 03:47 PM
I also like to get to know the person.

I also believe that how you treat your dog is quite similar to parenting your children, you may not agree with some parenting methods, but ultimately it comes down to the parents to make parenting decisions.

I do however agree that it would be nice (not necessary though) if the OP could post update info.

Safyre
June 24th, 2005, 04:06 PM
I understand where JDG is comming from, there is one or two members i can think of that post info that not everyhone needs to know. I realize these ppl might need attention, are lonely, or jsut whatever, but it does get annoying. I just bte my tongue and don't read the threads anymore.

I get annoyed when ppl post for advise and get upset as well, but i think it depends on the tone of the advice. Some ppl jump down throats and make the OP get defensive. Also, they are asking for ADVICE. Asking for advice does not always mean they are going to take it, they want to know what other ppl's feelings are.

I dunno, i think this topic is just a complete rant anyways, nothing is going to change. Good to B*tch about it from time to time though :)

iRONKNiGHT
June 24th, 2005, 04:19 PM
-People who give their life stories. We here to talk pets (a little teeny weenie tiny bit of personal information is nice - but no one really wants a novel about a trip to the grocery store, that time you went to the mall or 'that one time, at band camp') I like 'knowing' people by their pets. . .



Yea but this one time at band camp LOL.... You're RIGHT ON JDG! :thumbs up
but lately when i see personal issues i just ignore them.. people seem to complain about everything... and they know who they are..as for me.. (http://www.pets.ca/forum/showthread.php?p=144346#post144346)

CyberKitten
June 24th, 2005, 04:22 PM
I agree regarding the people who seek advice about a bleeding pet - or worse. I simply do not understand why anyone would seek an easy way out for that. For me - and for most here I think - our pets are family and if they are sick, we take them to the vet. There are genuine questions and concerns like experiences at the vet, travelling with pets, comparison of medications presecribed by different vets, intro of animals, behaviour issues - an endless list and I do not mind respnding to thise. I even respond to the "urgent ones usually saying get to a vet asap. Occasionally, I respond even tho someone may have already said it and I think just maybe my extra post might reinforce it. Sometimes, it has already been replied to and I would simply be diplicating the obvious.

I suspect some people are looking for a cheap way out and I do agree with the examples given - i.e. I don't have a job, car or whatever to get to the vet. Obviously, the person manages to pay for their ISP bill so they cannot be that badly off. Now, someone homeless who really needs help is another matter but they are not likely to show up here - tho I suppose they could access the net at the library or a community access center or school...

As for "I realize these ppl might need attention, are lonely, or jsut whatever, but it does get annoying. I just bte my tongue and don't read the threads anymore." I think if people are lonely then why not let them post their concerns here - that is why there is a thread called Other or Non Pet issues (I forget the title and if I click Back, I will loose all I have written, lol). If anyone is bothered by it, just do not bother replying. We all have issues. I am not sure I'd post all my problems here but I have a good support system. Many people have become quite accustomed to talking to others online (especially younger people) and if we can help, why not? I do not always have time to read everything and I probably miss some posts b/c of that (I just read New Posts) but for the most part, this works for me.

Safyre
June 24th, 2005, 05:48 PM
As for "I realize these ppl might need attention, are lonely, or jsut whatever, but it does get annoying. I just bte my tongue and don't read the threads anymore." I think if people are lonely then why not let them post their concerns here - that is why there is a thread called Other or Non Pet issues (I forget the title and if I click Back, I will loose all I have written, lol). If anyone is bothered by it, just do not bother replying. We all have issues. I am not sure I'd post all my problems here but I have a good support system. Many people have become quite accustomed to talking to others online (especially younger people) and if we can help, why not? I do not always have time to read everything and I probably miss some posts b/c of that (I just read New Posts) but for the most part, this works for me.


I am young myself, have had the internet since 14 and have become very accustomed to talking to online friends about problems.
I guess I see a difference between a Forum, and a personal IM. To me, it seems like there are some ppl posting info that not everyone needs to know, and it might just be because they are lonely. To me it seems like they are attention seeking, and i HATE that from ppl, huge pet peeve. And as stated in your quote of me, I just bite my tongue and don't read the threads anymore. I was just replying to say that I understood where JDG was comming from with her comment.

CyberKitten
June 24th, 2005, 08:26 PM
Safre, I know what you mean but I hate to judge people. Who knows why some people dp what they do - I don't have enough time to worry about it all, lol

Luba
June 24th, 2005, 08:32 PM
Interesting topic and comments

Summed up with "internet love it hate it use it abuse it"

Karin
June 24th, 2005, 09:05 PM
I need to say "byte me" more often....lol!



(not a typo)