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Please Help Me!!!

April 15th, 2005, 11:55 AM
How do I get over the awful feeling of guilt I have about crate training Zoe?? I feel so bad that she is home alone! She doesn't whine when she's in the crate, she goes in all by herself - she's really good about it all!! It's ME with the problem!! I have no intentions about her being crated everyday for the rest of her life. I babied Copper so much, I don't want the same thing to happen to Zoe. I want to be able to leave Zoe at home alone for a few hours whereas with Copper, I can't. I miss Copper so much when he isn't with me - even though I know he is at Grandma's(his favorite place on earth!). I'm the one with Separation Anxiety!!

Anyone have any advice for me? :sad:

April 15th, 2005, 12:22 PM
I don't know C's Mom. I know my brother crate trained his lab when he was a puppy - he no longer uses it of course. (In fact, the crate only lasted for while G was a puppy and once he was able to hold it till my brother or someone could go home at noon to take him for his walk, the crate was gone. So I guess knowing it is just a short term measure could help. G would actually go into his crate all by himself - he had lots of toys (as I am sure your doggie has) and other essentials, blanket et al. I know we already had the "crate debate" on here, lol - but it does seem to be a good training tool for puppies.

It is also better for her to get used to being alone so that she does not develop issues ike seperation anxiety and so forth. I worried about sep anxiety with YY (tho she is a kitty but I think it is the same for cats and dogs?) but a few weeks with a friend while I was away to Sumatra and a few days with the grandfolks showed her she could get everything she wanted (sans moi) fine without me. (The little brat, lol)

She spent so much time with my dad when they were visiting that I wondered about her but when it came time to go to bed, she jumped on my bed and in the morning, continued her practice of sleeping on top of me as if to remind me "hey, it's morning. We have rounds and I want to eat something, lol"

I am sure Zoe will be fine but I know it's tough. They are our babies!!

April 15th, 2005, 12:26 PM
Aw, Zoe's fine with it. Einstein is my first crated dog..I felt awful when he DID whine, like I was locking him up. This Wednesday, when he was neutered, I tried to "do him a favor" and let him sleep in my room out of his crate. He didn't want to be out of his bed. That's where he felt secure. His door was open but he stayed there. I won't crate him forever either, when I'm sure he'll be okay while I'm out, he'll have free run like the rest. For now, he's safer (no cord chewing), the furniture is safer and things are great. You're teaching her how to be alone for a bit at a time and that's a good thing :thumbs up . Don't be so hard on yourself..she isn't fussing and that's great. You're a good Mommy for worrying, it's not a bad thing :love: . She'll thank you in the long run. I wish I had magic words for you.

April 15th, 2005, 12:47 PM
It is also better for her to get used to being alone so that she does not develop issues ike seperation anxiety and so forth.

This is EXACTLY why i'm crate training her. She has to be in a crate, not in a room blocked off with gates because George, the stray I took in in Jan or Feb has been attacking Zoe! I thought Zoe lost her nose the other night, scared the crap out of me.

I will be taking her out with me and Copper when we go places, it just can't be ALL of the time. I know all about the big crate debate, lol. But, she nees to learn to be alone sometimes. I've had her for nine days, she's been crated 3 times and the longest she's been left alone will be today, for 4 hours. But even if i leave her for an hour, I feel bad!

Trust me, I want to take her everywhere with me!!! It's so hard to leave her at home. But it's also good for me because it gives me a little bit of a break from her too! :o She's such a little busy body!!

I'm just a big softie!!!

April 15th, 2005, 12:48 PM
I know exactly how you feel! When I had to crate train my dog I felt horrible. But she loved the crate. I would leave the door open when I was home and when she felt tired I would find her napping in her crate. I wouldn't have had much of a house left if I hadn't had the crate. She was a big chewer and since I had to leave her alone for a couple of hours to go to classes, the crate was the only way to go to keep her out of trouble.

Dogs are den animals and if introduced properly, most love their crates. It becomes a place that they feel secure and a place they can run off too if they just want to get away for a little bit and be by themselves.

My dog no longer uses the crate but her crate training has become very useful. She tore both knee ligaments a few years ago and had to be crated during her recovery from surgery. There would have been no way that I would have been able to keep her quiet if it weren't for her crate training.

You are being a great mommy to Zoe. By having her crate trained she will stay out of trouble and her training will go much easier.

I know it is hard, but you are definitely doing the right thing. I'm sure Zoe doesn't mind.

April 15th, 2005, 03:14 PM
We crated Molly,our cairn when she first came out of rescue.She was not 100%clean,had separation issues and needed somewhere she could have quiet time.That was a year ago.Molly still has her crate(always open door now)Our old himmy sleeps in there with Molly and Molls uses the crate to stash stolen socks,other dogs toys,rawhide,etc.Don't feel bad about crating your baby,you'll both be happier in the end.