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Kids and Pets. Sorry, a vent.

Dahlia
March 11th, 2005, 03:44 PM
I think I just might have the laziest kids in the world. First they've been bugging me for a dog ever since they could talk. Now they're almost 8 and 10 yrs old. We just got a puppy a little over a week ago. Now, don't get me wrong, I wasn't expecting them to do all the work taking care of the puppy, but they could at LEAST help out! I'm home all day and I am working really hard on potty training her, so I am taking her out constantly and watching her constantly. The only time I don't have my eyes glued to her is when she falls asleep then I put her in her crate until she wakes up.

When the kids are home I ask them to take her out maybe once a day, each kid, while I'm trying to cook dinner, etc... When I do, first of all they argue about who has to do it and fuss and whine until sometimes she goes in the floor before one of them gets off their butt and takes her out.

And when they do take her out, they're either out there for 30 seconds and come back in and say she wouldn't do anything (I can't imagine why she doesn't do anything in that amount of time) :p , or they come back in and lie, and say she pooped, then she squats a minute after they set her down in the house. Hmmm....

Am I the only one whose kids act like this? When I was a kid I was the one who took care of my pets without having to be told, and without complaining, and I did it right. GGGRRRR. They just bug the p**s out of me.

On top of all that, they're scared of her! She weighs 3 lbs, and she's a beagle! What's there to be afraid of? They say she 'bites' them. She does nibble on them when she's playing but it's not like it kills them. They will walk sideways, run and jump on the couch, everything, just to stay away from her. I just want to beat the crap out of them sometimes.

Ok, I feel a little better now. Am I the only one with this problem? Like I said, I'm not expecting them to do much, I just don't want them to act so goofy about everything. It's driving me nuts. :crazy:

maddoxies
March 11th, 2005, 03:52 PM
Make them clean up a few "accidents". That should be an incentive for them to take her outside. Maybe make up a schedule, so there is no arguing about whose turn it is.

We recently got a golden into rescue and the reason given for giving up the 4 year old dog was "the kids won't walk her". Unfortunately, your story is not unique, but it is unusual that the novelty has worn off in only a week. I hate to rain on your parade, but I don't think that they are going to be much more interactive with her later on either. Kids should be arguing about who gets to be with the puppy more, not who HAS to be with her.

When she nips them, that is acceptable play initiation in "puppy". They need to let out a high pitched "ouch" (like a puppy yelp). That is "puppy" for "you hurt me, stop that". This should help her to stop nipping/mouthing them. All their antics to evade her are seen as invitations to play by the puppy.

Good luck

Prin
March 11th, 2005, 04:03 PM
I agree with the schedule. My aunt got a dog recently from Rosie's and when she was in the hospital, the oldest sibling made a very detailed schedule. It had EVERY responsibility of the dog and the time it had to be done and a little X under the name of the kid that had to do it. There was feeding, water, brushing, changing the house training newspapers, going out (about 8 times for this puppy) and when they went out they had a fixed trajectory outside that they had to follow. It's a little rigid but that's how you learn what a dog needs. If they complained, they were quickly reminded that this is what having a dog is about. Not just good times but messy times, sick times and sad times.

sammiec
March 11th, 2005, 04:08 PM
I agree with goldengirl. It seems the novelty has worn off and they are just not interested in helping out. I doubt that this will improve, unless you make it seem fun and less like a chore to take the dog out. Ask them to go together with her! Make them clean up the mess inside if she does make one. And spend time with the four of them and teach them how to respect the little puppy and how to teach her what's right and what's wrong. Teach them how to react if the dog nips and what not to do. That might help them want to be around her more if they dont' feel as though they are being bitten everytime they approach her.

Prin
March 11th, 2005, 04:15 PM
I agree with Sammiec that you should spend time with them with the dog because if the dog is not fun to be with and is pulling on the leash, it might deter them from wanting to be with the dog...

Rainy
March 11th, 2005, 04:28 PM
A puppy class that your kids take with your pup will teach them how to socialize with thier puppy without getting nipped.It's fun for the kids after they realize they can teach thier puppy tricks! That should definately help them bond and in turn want to take the pup outside. :)

Dahlia
March 11th, 2005, 04:30 PM
I have done all of the above, except the schedule. I just feel like it's easier for me to take the puppy out than to have them gripe about it. And I feel like it's not good for Sophie while she's potty training to have them out there with her with their negative attitudes. I have showed them how to take her out and told them exactly what to do, where to take her, how long to have her there, etc... They come back in and say she didn't have to go because she came back to the door. Well, she wouldn't come back to the door if THEY didn't let her. Of course, she'd rather be in here where it's warm and dry, but she has to do her business first. And I explain this to them EVERY time. They are just WAY too lazy.

Same with the biting. I get down on the floor with them and show them what to do, but it seems pointless. They start yelling NO at her the minute she starts walking towards them. They don't even give her a chance to try to 'bite'. Then I have to remind them again that's not what you do. I don't understand, is this the difference between animal lovers and non-animal lovers? When I was a kid I had all kinds of puppies of kittens, and yes, they did nip at me when playing, but I PLAYED with them, and didn't whine about it. And it doesn't really hurt, it's not like a big dog is ATTACKING them or anything.

Dahlia
March 11th, 2005, 04:32 PM
Rainy, I hadn't thought of a puppy class for that. I'll check into that. My dh is gonna die when he finds out he has to pay to send a dog to school. He's always complaining about how much the kids cost. Oh, well.

Prin
March 11th, 2005, 04:38 PM
Aren't kids like dogs in that if you give in, they will just do whatever it is that makes you cave? Like arguing about whose turn it is?

Jackie467
March 11th, 2005, 04:59 PM
Wow. You have a lot of tolerance, my mother would have kicked my butt by now (not that she ever had to). When I was 10 I was stricktly responsible for my animals myself (though we did live in farm country so it wasn't unusual for someone younger than me to be raising livestock where I lived) I had a dog who was a family dog so we really all took care of him, my mother did the morning stuff and i did the afternoon and evening stuff. and he nipped but it never bothered me and he was a doberman pincher. I also had a cat (the cat i currently have now actully I got her when i was 8) and a rabbit that were strictly mine to care for. and the rabbit lived in the barn (don't worry got lots of love and the barn was heated with electricity and horses so when my mother and i went up to spend time with the horses(not my resposiblity they were hers) we would let scamper (the bunny) run around and play, and anyone with horses knows you spend A LOT of time in the barn) and i had to do this in the freezing snow. (we lived in PA) and my mother and I would actully argue over who got to take care of the animals lol. I think the novelty just wore off for your kids. I agree with making them clean up the messes the puppy makes (I always cleaned a dobies up and that is way bigger than a puppy beagle's mess). I think maybe you just need to tolerate the griping and sooner or later they'll just stop whining cuz they will know it won't do any good.

Dahlia
March 11th, 2005, 05:17 PM
Hi jackie, I grew up on a farm too. We had horses, goats, chickens, ducks, rabbits, dogs, cats, you name it. I lived with my grandparents and my granddad and I did all the feeding and caring for them. I had my chores and he had his. I did mine every day when I got home from school and did work on the farm all weekend. We also raised a tobacco crop every year. I'm in KY. When my granddad died, I was 15, then ALL the chores were mine. Still no complaints. I weighed about 110 lbs then and carried hay bales that I'm sure weighed about as much as I did, to the horses and goats, along with 5-gallon buckets of water. I never thought a thing about it.

I guess that's why it baffles me when my kids gripe about little bitty things like this. You're right, I am too tolerant. My husband says so too, he's not so tolerant. The kids shape up the minute he walks in the door.LOL!

Dahlia
March 11th, 2005, 05:20 PM
Prin, I think you're right. But my kids are more stubborn than any dog I ever had. They get that from their father. Hmm, that's one reason why we're divorced! ;)

meowzart
March 11th, 2005, 06:34 PM
Dahlia - I have four kids 9-19 years...so been there My experience is that quite frankly kids of your age can't yet 'handle' a puppy. Puppies are obnoxious to little kids - especially a high energy breed. Quite literally they see kids as a litter mate - and treat them accordingly...they bite them, they jump, they chew, they climb over them, they do NOT see them as any kind of alpha and it is almost impossible to get them to see them as such, hence it is your responsibility to look after the puppy (sorry about the that) if you want it done properly. Once the dog is older and less silly, the kids will learn to handle the dog but first the dog needs to become a tolerable house member. Unless you have a real laid back dog this seems to be how it works. Good luck.

I too grew up on the farm, but handling a city-dog and a farm outside dog are very different.

meowzart
March 11th, 2005, 06:36 PM
ps - I don't believe dogs should be allowed to nip kids either - she needs to learn bit inhibition and that's also our job not the kids..

reason given for giving up the 4 year old dog was "the kids won't walk her".

People who get a pet thinking that the kids will look after it are nuts!

Dahlia
March 11th, 2005, 06:49 PM
I hope you don't think I'm expecting the kids to look after her, I just want them to all get along! LOL! Okay, so my kids are normal, and I was the abnormal kid? I'll buy that. I never saw my puppies as obnoxious, I just played with them they grew out of being 'obnoxious' without any special training. We had inside and outside dogs, most of which we got as puppies, and I was a lot younger than my kids are now. The baby isn't afraid of Sophie. He doesn't even flinch when she comes running at him and jumps in his lap. He doesn't even cry when she nips him, that's how I know my older kids are overreacting about how much it "hurts". He pets her very gently and tries to share his toys with her. I guess he inherited my animal handling abilities.

meowzart
March 11th, 2005, 07:03 PM
no I didn't think that - but I know some people do ! Ha! what a joke! :)

Jackie467
March 11th, 2005, 07:12 PM
just so everyone knows even though I lived in farm country and all our naighbors had farms we didn't have one (we only had 4 acres.), and our dogs were strictly indoor dogs.

Didn't want anyone thinking we had our dogs outside 24/7 :D . Poor dobies would have froze.

Katherine1
March 11th, 2005, 08:49 PM
I too think both the puppy and the kids might benifit by taking a puppy class. :)

CyberKitten
March 11th, 2005, 11:07 PM
Not much I can add here except the old adage that when a family gets a puppy for the kids, one must understand it is not the kids who will be the primary caregiver - and your kids are young. But I am not telling you anything you do not already know. :)

Are there games you can play with the puppy and the kids to demonstate how to make sure she does not nip them? Beagles are high energy and usually they love kids - and do not see them as an alpha dog so the kids are fair game.

My parents made us look after "our" dogs too but we were teenagers when it was required seriously. We had a Siberian Husky when I was a toddler but no one expected us to look after him - just play with him and he was a great dog with children! I was given a poodle as a gift when I was a teenager but it was a "get well" kind of gift - the poddle was the son of a Champion with mega titles and the breeder a close family friend. I WAS required to look after that dog and did so gladly.

There are classes you and the children could take to help in their bonding with the beagle. (even if your husband won't be thrilled, lol) I do not think they are expensive tho.

lilith_rizel
March 12th, 2005, 12:43 AM
I will admit when I was that age, as much as I wanted a dog, I didn't want to bring it out to go potty, on walks, or feed it, I just wanted to play with it..... But being that I had lots of patience, I was the one who trained all of our dogs, and my other sisters got stuck with everything else (feeding, walks, ect)

Rainy
March 14th, 2005, 11:51 AM
I remember when I was a kid I had to take our dog out and when it was cold outside I hated it!
I agree with including your kids in the raising,playing and even chores of cleaning up after the puppy.They imo need to walk the puppy with you.Things such as how NOT too yank the leash have to be taught.Also they need to learn how to read a dogs clues for when he really has to do his/her business! My family looked after my inlaws dog for awhile last summer and my boys were allowed to hold the leash but I was with them every time.I cannot tell you how many times I had to tell them..."whoa" the dog is peeing STOP and let him! LOL
Remember that your kids have not had experience with dogs meeting each other outside and have no idea how too handle a situation should they meet up with an agressive dog!
A puppy class gets the children interacting with your puppy and I have seen firsthand a child beaming with pride when they were able to get the dog to listen to them,sit,stay,give a paw etc...and proudly show off the puppies graduation papers :thumbs up

Cinnabear
March 14th, 2005, 01:21 PM
Well I think your the one who will always be taking care of the puppy? My dd's 13 and 15 are always argueing who to let out and in. I always feed and water. Sometimes they might consider walking the dogs, usually to them it's around the block and home. :D Then they wonder why is the dog attached to me. :p